Ask and Dare 3
by DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympians
Summary: Welcome to our moon base! This is Ask and Dare 3, in story format, and we ask that you PM us with your dares. But please, have a seat and enjoy yourself! Come in, come in! And welcome, to ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Well, Ask and Dare 2 got deleted… So I will try my best to actually follow the rules while using as many loopholes as possible. SO this time, if you have dares and stuff, please PM me under the title "Ask and Dare 3 review." Same rules as the last one, no becoming a host, no large explosions, no yaoi or adult themes, and whatever the last one was… (I forgot) btw, I'll accept script like format only for dares. If someone is speaking during your PM, please keep it story style, please.**

**Well, without further adieu, here is Ask and Dare version 3.0!**

It is a large studio, with a few dim lights. At the left, we see a large Icee machine, a restaurant, the top of what looks like a large arena, and many doors with different sayings on them. For example, 'The Changing Room,' 'The Weapons Room,' 'The Land of Sues,' and 'The Donut Room.' At the right, we see an ocean, a rainforest, and a large closet. Behind us, we see a long passageway with many forks and more oddities. But right in front of us, we see a window overlooking the Earth: we are on the moon.

Suddenly, all the lights turn on, and four people come running out from the large closet. One is a girl with long brown hair and green eyes; another is a girl with medium length, curly dark brown hair and dark brown eyes; another is a girl with shoulder length blonde hair ad blue eyes with glasses; and the last one is a boy with short brown hair and green eyes.

"Hello!" The first girl calls out. "My name is Doc!" She then gestures to her friends. "And this is Sei," the second girl smiles and waves, "Lynn," the third girl smiles, "and my little bro, Kai!" The boy smiles, and makes a 'call me' gesture. "And this is…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" A swarm of people run out of the closet to join the group of four. They are the cast of Fullmetal Alchemist. As they run out, the theme song for the Avengers TV show –"Fight as One"- plays.

"Alright!" Doc says, and claps her hands. "Since we don't have any PMs with dares for this so far, we're going to use the last seven reviews from Ask and Dare 2. So let's give a warm welcome to our first guest: **Maruki Shitoichi**!"

Maruki Shitoichi comes running in through a different door with a bazooka in her arms, followed by Natsumi.

**Maru: I'm BACK! *loading her bazooka***

**Natsumi: *hides* Hide! Before she could dare you!**

**Maru: *shoots Natsumi* Zip it, Natsumi! Anyway on to the dares! *evil grin***

"How fun!" Lynn giggles.

**Ed: Let everyone tell you, that YOU ARE short**

Everyone advances on Edward, letting out a bunch of short comments: "Wow, you're short." One laughs. "Can you even reach the sink?" "What about Six Flags? Can you ride anything there?" And more.

After a few minutes, Ed can't take it anymore. "WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE CAN'T BE SEEN WITH A MICROSCOPE?!" He shouts, and starts to punch and kick anyone near him.

"Wharf to Sick Bay…" Kai tells his walkie talkie.

**Al: Slaps him if he starts to use his short rants on anyone**

Amidst the chaos, Alphonse wades through the swarm of people, and slaps his brother after hitting the twelfth person. "BROTHER STOP HITTING EVERYONE!"

"WHY SHOULD I?! THEY CALLED ME SHORT!"

"Do you want to get sent to the Land of Sues again?" Alphonse points to the door marked "Land of Sues," and Edward sets down the person he was about to hit.

**Winry: Hits him with a wrench if he starts to use his short rants on anyone**

A second later, Winry came down on Ed with her wrench. "OW WINRY! WHAT THE HELL? I STOPPED HITTING THEM!"

"But you still used your short rants. So I hit you."

"THAT'S NOT FAIR!"

**Roy: Let Riza pours water on you every time you burned or declines doing your paperwork**

**the endless piles one *evil laugh***

"Do you hate me?" Roy asks with disbelief.

**AND YES, I DO HATE YOU, MUSTANG! YOU COLONEL USELESS!**

"Aw…" Roy trudges over to his desk, piled with paperwork, and starts to sign them. A few minutes in, he took a break, and Riza poured a bucket of water on his head. "IM WORKING! IM WORKING!" Roy shouts and vigorously goes back to signing his paperwork.

**Riza: slaps Havoc every time he started to smoke again, secretly...**

"But I don't smoke. Lynn doesn't want me to." Havoc protests.

In the background, Roy tries to burn his paperwork, which Riza immediately responds to by pouring another bucket of water on his head.

**Natsumi: You're being too much PSYCHO, Maru!**

**Maru: Why yes, yes I am! *shoots Natsumi* Now be quiet!**

**Natsumi: Bye... *dies***

**Maru: I'll revive her later! *smashes all the doors and wall***

**That's for the payback, BAKai!**

"Is that my new nickname?" Kai asks. "I don't like it."

**Maru: And yes, IT IS your nick name! BAKai! As in 'Stupid Kai'! Bye!**

"I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS!" Kai shouts after Maru. "THAT'S WHY I DON'T LIKE IT! IM NOT STUP- Oh, hey! What's that thing do?" He points to the guidebook for the camera. "Manual? Who's Manual?"

"It's a manual. It shows us how to operate the camera we're broadcasting from." Sei explains. Then she turns to the camera. "The next review is from **Ashynarr**."

Ashynarr walks in, nervously looking around.

**Uhm... ((nervous wave)) hi?**

"Hi." Everyone replies.

**Okay, so I don't really know you guys, but I'm a friend of Doc's and decided to check this out. I come... from the Hetalia fandom. Yes **

"You brought a friend from Hetalia fandom?" Sei asks.

"Yes, yes I did." Doc smiles proudly.

**Anyway, since I don't really know you guys, can you tell me a bit about yourselves? **

"So everybody, tell Ashy two things about yourself! Oh yeah, and your name doesn't count as one." Doc commands. Edward steps up.

"My name is Edward Elric, I am the Fullmetal Alchemist, and I lost my arm and leg doing the taboo." Then Alphonse.

"Hi! My name is Alphonse Elric, I lost my body during the taboo of human transmutation, and now brother and I are looking for a way to get our bodies back." Then Winry.

"Hi, I'm Winry Rockbell, I'm a mechanic, and I made Ed's arm and leg." Then Roy.

"Hello, I am Colonel Roy Mustang, I am the Flame Alchemist, and my dream is to turn the military into my personal mini skirt harem." Then Riza.

"I am Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye, I work under the Colonel, and I an a renowned sniper from the Ishbalan Extermination Campaign." Then Scar.

"I have no name but most call me Scar, I survived the Ishbalan Extermination Campaign, and now I hunt down State Alchemists." Then Mustang's group.

"We are Warrant Officer Vato Falman, Master Sergeant Kain Fuery, Second Lieutenant Havoc, and Second Lieutenant Heymans Breda, we worked for Colonel Roy Mustang, and we helped expose the president as a homunculus." Then the homunculi.

"We are homunculi, we are named after the seven deadly sins, and we each have a philosopher's Stone as a heart, so it's hard to kill us." Then Father.

"I am Father, I gave birth to the homunculi, and it is my dream to become the perfect being." Then the chimera from the Devil's Nest.

"Our names are Martel, Dorchet, Bido, and Roa. We are chimeras, and we serve under Mr. Greed."

"So that's the basics." Doc says. "But I hope you get into Fullmetal Alchemist, it's really good!"

**Secondly... well... maybedothemacarena? **

"Sure!" Lynn smiles, and shows everybody how to do it. "So it's right arm out, left arm out, right hand over, left hand over, right hand on left shoulder, left hand on right shoulder, right hand on head, left hand on head, right hand on left hip, left hand on right hip, right hand on right hip, left hand on left hip, then twist, and turn to the left." She explains, and the group follows along. "Let's start the music!"

Lynn then turns on the music and everyone starts to dance to the Macarena.

"That was awesome!" Doc proclaims, and everyone nods in agreement.

**I think that's everything for now! Bye bye! (and remember your promise Doc! I'm holding you to it!)**

"Yeah, I know. Good thing I already did it! Or did I…" Doc starts to ponder whether or not she actually did what she promised to do.

"And the next review is from **animelover102**." Lynn says, and animelover walks into the room with Lucy.

**DOC ONCE AGAIN IM BACK AND READY TO SLAP SOMEONE**

**Lucy: ok ok animelover clam down**

**Me: WHY SHOULD I**

**Lucy: -.- listen i know you upset but you can slap him at the end **

**Me: ok fine anyway dare time**

Everyone groans. They don't like dare time.

**All the boys: YOU BIG PERVERTS SHAME ON YOU FOR WATCHING THE GIRLS!**

All the boys start to protest, but were silenced by a gun shot from Riza.

**Al: where you also watching the girls because if you were then OMG SHAME ON YOU **

"I wasn't watching them! I was minding my own business!" Alphonse exclaims.

**Lucy: no i don't think he did al isn't like his brother you know**

**Me: oh ya anyway **

**Roy and envy: once again off the hook but one day one day i tell ya one day i shall give my revenge *laughs creepy* MUWAHAHAHAHA**

Roy and Envy shudder at the thought of a hyper girls' revenge. Could it be like the donut thing that RubySaphireMoon had used on Kai? Or maybe worse…

**Lucy: sorry about animelover acting that why she's high on sugar again**

**Me: :3 what i just love sweets especially chocolate**

**Lucy: umm animelover it's the end of your list or are you going to dare everyone **

**Me: nope no dare for everyone but now i can slap the person i wanted to slap **

"Who did you want to slap? Please tell me it's the pervy guys!" Doc says. "I need more revenge!"

***slaps ed* **

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!" Ed screams, and rubs his cheeck, which already has a red handprint on it.

**THATS FOR YELLING AT ME I KNOW YOU ALREADY EXPLAINED WHY BUT WHY HATE ANIMALES YOU HATER**

"IM NOT A HATER! I JUST DON'T LIKE ANIMALS!" Edward protests.

**Al: now you're officially my #1 fav character which means no pain for you :D**

"Yay!" Alphonse cheers.

**Lucy: anyway while she's over there changing her fan wallpaper animelover wants to give gifts to people **

**Me: ya anyway here al you said you like turtles so here's one its a she you can name her and if ed says no doc can i go to your studio just to slap him plz :3**

**lucy: id like to see that can i come too**

**me: sure you can while your there you can slice the two people i hate**

**lucy: -.- ok whatever sorry but shes paying me to be here anyway so ya**

"I'll call her Tasha. Tasha the turtle. Can we keep her brother? Please?" Alphonse begs.

"No Al. We can't take care of it." Then animelover slaps Ed. "OW!" Ed rubs his sore head.

Meanwhile, Roy and Envy got a painful punishment. "OW! "GAH! MY SPINE!"

**me: ya and a lot that is anyway thanks doc for being awesome bye :3**

"You're welcome!" Doc smiles, and waves goodbye to animelover and Lucy.

"The last review is from **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**." Kai says.

**Konnichiwa!**

**Rin, why the hell are you eating the plastic sandwich?**

**Rin: I feel like it.**

**Don't you have other dares?**

**Rin: Touche. Um, Al, go to a puppy mill and slap every puppy there. If you don't cry, you get every puppy there.**

Alphonse nods, and goes into the door marked "Puppy Mill." The cameras there turn on, and you see Alphonse slapping innocent puppies, who give the kicked puppy look, and Alphonse is apologizing after each slap, and trying hard not to cry.

When he finally comes out, he's holding a little puppy in his arms.

**Better. My turn.**

**Roy- take ME to a hibachi! I've always wanted to go there! And you are paying for everything. That's payback for being a perv to Riza.**

Roy shrugs. "I've always wanted to go there myself." At that, Doc cuts in and starts to spazz.

"YOU MEAN YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO HIBACHI OMIGOD YOU HAVE TO GO I KNOW THIS PLACE AND BLAH BLAH BLAH!"

"Um, how about we go during the chapter break…"

**Riza- I apologize for Roy. *takes out M-16* SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND! *kills Riza***

AS Riza dies, everyone starts to protest. "WHY DID YOU KILL HER?!" "RIZA!" And someone starts to sing "Amazing Grace."

**Well, what did you expect? I had to balance out the universe. One good deed for one bad deed.**

Roy: But two wrongs don't make a right...?

**Yeah. No one finished that saying. It ends with "Cause an eye is for an eye. Not two eyes for one."**

"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind, an ear for an ear means no one can hear, and a mouth for a mouth means that no one can protest." Doc informs. ROy just stares at her.

"Whose side are you on?"

"I am a First Lieutenant in the Devil's Army, so yeah, her side." Doc nods.

**Winry- The emerald wrench I gave you before. Hand it over. You are no longer worthy of it.**

Winry hands over her emerald wrench, and replaces it with her old one.

***pulls out Flamethrower of Doom* *torches Winry***

AS Winry dies, there are more protests.

**I'm using this way too much...**

**Ed- Keep up the good work. Here's a tub of milk free ice cream.**

Ed stares at the tub of ice cream suspiciously. "Are you trying to trick me?" He asks.

**No, I'm not tricking you. I have Maru's magic wishing pool down in hell. I asked for milk free chocolate ice cream, and it gave me some.**

"Oh." Ed says. "Okay." He then stashes the ice cream into the freezer in the restaurant.

**Hosts- Sing the "Crow Song" from Angel Beats with me!**

"Sure!" Comes the unanimous reply. "Wait, Romanji or English translation?" Sei asks, then smiles as her friends reply "Romanji."

So everyone starts singing "Crow Song."

**For your reward in finding the song, you each get Pocky! **

"Wait," Kai says, "you didn't think we would find it? We have almost every song here!" He shouts angrily. "But thanks for the pocky."

**Now, i have to go.**

"Why?" Doc asks.

**Why? Because Rin's starting to break fever.**

"She's sick?" Sei wonders aloud.

**No, she's not sick. She's suffering from KWS.**

"What's that?" Lynn asks.

**Kimblee-Withdrawl Syndrome. Before she steals Kimblee, we're leaving. Sayonara. Rose, you're next on my list for Chinese Bamboo Torture. Watch out...**

Rose gulps, and Doc stakes center studio. "Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, and "The A-Team Theme" starts to play as the lights fade out.

**A/N: Wow. This takes so much longer than script format… PM if you have dares, review if you don't. Remember, I love little reviews if you can't think of anything to dare~**

**~DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympian s, seikatsu-chan, rachLA, and Kai**


	2. Disney Song Marathon

**A/N: Hello. I am in need of two things: A beta, and a cover for Ask and Dare. PLEASE SUPPLY ME WITH BOTH PLEASE!**

The lights in the studio flashed on, and everyone runs in from the restaurant. Doc performs a cartwheel, and starts the show.

"Hello, and welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers. Then Sei walks to the middle of the room.

"The first set of dares are from me, **seikatsu-chan**."

Sei: Um... Guys? *faints*

Doc: OMG! Sei!

Roy: *checks pulse/breath* I don't really know how to say this, but... she doesn't have a pulse.

Doc: CPR! *does CPR*

Sei: *comes in with a rocket* Hi!

Everyone: 0.o

Kai: But- You- But-

Doc: How?

Sei: Oh, the beta test for robo-me is a success! Sorry, I was trying to stay off of the moon because I get rocket sickness. *staggers* Luckily, I happen to have a cure. :)

Lynn: Um...

Sei: So, I have some dares

**1) who wants to play "Blowing Up Stuff" with me?**

Almost everyone raised his or her hands, and Sei nodded approvingly. "Good. But we should take this to the Dalek planet." She said, and summoned a portal to the Dalek planet, where everyone blew everything up. And it was fun.

**2) Let's cosplay as Hetalia Characters!**

Doc smiled widely. "Since I'm too lazy to type it all out, I'll just supply you with the names and such." She explained.

Riza: Switzerland

Doc: Spain

Sei: Hungary

Edward: America

Alphonse: Canada

Roy: France

Kai: Prussia

Lynn: Lichtenstein

Lust: Fem!Spain

Gluttony: North Italy

Envy: South Italy

Pride: Sealand

ect.

**3) Riza, can you teach me how to shoot a sniper rifle? I can pretty much only use a handgun... Not that it doesn't have lasers, but still!**

Riza nods. "Sure. It's quite simple to use. All you have to do it lie down on your stomach, aim carefully, and shoot. It's just like a normal gun, but it's not."

**4) Roy, here is fanfiction. Read the whole RoyX*insert character here* fanfiction.**

Roy sits down to read it. After a while, he has a creepy smile on his face. "Oh, Lieutenant, would you like to act this out with me?" His response is a bullet hole in the wall a millimeter away from his head.

**5) Winry, what do you think of this? *throws automail heart at Winry* it comes with a whole bust if you want to see it.**

Winry gazes at the automail heart, going over the workmanship. After a while, she smiles. "This is a really good model! And I would love to see it in action!" Doc smiles at this.

"Good. Because we have a hospital here, and there's a man in need of heart surgery." Everyone stares at Doc. "What? This is the least weird thing that's ever happened."

**6) Doc, it's time for our Disney song singing marathon!**

Doc cheers at this. "YAY! We are going to sing "Circle of Life," "Zero to Hero," "Son of Man," "I Have a Dream," and "Bella Notte."" She smiles. "With everyone singing "Circle of Life," the hosts singing "Zero to Hero" for Ed, Ed and Al singing "Son of Man," everyone doing "I Have a Dream," And the hosts doing "Bella Notte" for Roy and Riza because it's fluffy~" She explains with a dreamy look in her eyes. Then she looks at Lynn, who starts the music. "Plus some extra ones…"

Suddenly, everyone was dressed as a different animal. Everyone stared at Sei, who just shrugged and replied that it was costume. So everyone started to sing "The Circle of Life" from The Lion King.

When the song ended, everyone was wearing normal cloths again, except for the hosts, who were dressed in Grecian outfits. Kai was wearing a toga that was obviously too big for him, and the girls had on fitted togas, and started to sing "Zero to Hero" from Hercules.

When that was over, they were in normal garb again, and Kai kissed his normal clothes. This time, Ed and Al were in primitive loincloths when the song started. They started to sing "Son of Man" from Tarzan.

When it was over, everyone was wearing Viking clothing, except Winry, who was in a purple dress, and Ed, who was wearing a white shirt, blue vest, and brown pants when the song started, so everyone started to sing "I've Got a Dream" from Rapunzel.

After that, everyone was dressed as kitchen utensils, except Riza, who was in a blue dress. Doc started to sing "Be Our Guest" from Beauty and the Beast.

For the last song, Sei was dressed as a meerkat, Doc is a warthog, and Roy and Edward are lions. And they started to sing "Hakuna Matata" from the Lion King.

Finally, everyone was back in their normal clothes, and no other songs seemed to be playing.

**7) Here, Kai. I fixed the Icee machine. Again. *chucks Icee machine at Kai***

Kai ran around in a circle trying to catch the Icee machine, which in turn, squashed him. Everyone rushed over to see if he was alright. "KAI! ARE YOU OK?!" In a muffled and pained voice, Kai answered back: "Ow, my squeedily spooch…" Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

"He's good."

**8) Ed, I dare you to kill Envy as many times as you can in a minute.**

Edward smiled maliciously at Envy, and Sei started the timer.

A minute later, Edward had managed to kill Envy 56 times.

**9) Alphonse! I made you a kitty. You can name her. So far, her name is Kit mach 10. She's from my lab.**

Alphonse gasped at the robotic cat. "She's so cute! I'll call her Kim!"

**10) Ling, are you aware that you lost? I'm the new king of Xing!**

Ling scrutinized Sei. "But aren't you a girl?"

Sei laughed. "So? There was a story about a man who caught a magic fish, and his wife kept wishing for grander things. In the end, she wished that she was king. So why can't I?"

"But that's just a story!" Ling protested.

"So? In ancient Egypt, Hatshepsut became a pharaoh when she knew that she was breaking the law."

Ling had nothing else to say.

**11) Mustang and Co...? I was wondering, would you sing Amazing Mustang for me? *puppy dog eyes***

"What's that?" They wondered.

"It's a song that's a spoof off of Amayzing Mayzie from Seussical the Musical." Sei explained. "Here's a script." She handed scripts to all the ones singing. "So Mei, you will be singing this part, Roy, you are doing this part, and you guys are the Bird Boys and Girl." Sei said. "NOW SING!"

Before the song started, Roy found himself a centaur with a feather boa around his arms, and a feather boa for a tail, Mei was a little blue bird with a one feather tail, and Mustang's group were all dressed as different colored birds with fabulous feather boas and fabulous tails. And they started to sing Doc and Sei's parody of "Amayzing Mayzie" from Seussical the Musical.

When the song is over, everyone is clapping. "So wait, I'm the elephant?" Alphonse asks nervously. Sei and Doc nod happily.

"Maybe if more people ask, we can do more musical numbers from Suessical the Musical: FMA." Sei says.

Sei: And now I'm staying as the real me! Btw, I just added Chinese water torture, another sue pit, and a shark tank (like the ones in spy movies) to the punishment arsenal. :3

"That's awesome!" Lynn proclaims. "And the next set of dares are from **RubySaphireMoon**."

***rattles inside Al's old armor* Hey guys, where's the latch on this thingy? **

"It's right here." Sei answers, and pulls the strap loose.

***climbs out* Thanks Sei. So anyway, on with the tor- I mean fun!**

The hosts smile, while the cast groans.

**Edward & Roy- So did you learn, or do I have to send you back to...the SUE PIT OF DOOM? Or I can roast you over a spit fire, gouge your eyes out, dump you in a ditch full of fire started by Roy's gloves (I stole some spares) then dump the remains over a cliff full of robo-crocodiles. *Motions to set up* hehehee...**

Roy and Edward just stare at her. "And why in the hell would we want to do that?" They ask incredulously.

**Envy- Can you PLEASE change your outfit! I mean really! My little cousin walked into me on my 6th time through the FMAB series (yes, I'm obsessed!) and pointed to you saying, "Cuzzie, why is that girl wearing slut clothes?" I laughed. **

Envy starts to fume. "THEY ARE NOT SLUT CLOTHES! They are cool, and I like them." He crosses his arms, and suddenly, he's wearing regular shorts and a t-shirt. He looks down at his new clothes with a shocked expression, then starts to chase Doc and Sei around. "HOW DARE YOU?!"

**Father- I still hate you. So, Ed gets to beat you up repeatedly and you can't use your powers. That's a dare. To see if you can even survive.**

Edward cracks his knuckles and Father just stands there with a neutral expression. A few minutes later, Father was on the ground moaning, and Ed was standing triumphantly over him "Take that." He commented.

**Winry- Hehe, I realized that when I was in wrench form in previous review (took me forever to get out!) I ran off with it. So I bought you a new one. It has automated mini-tools to help with your work.**

Winry smiled happily complete with sparkly eyes. "THANK YOU SO MUCH!" She squealed.

**Kai- I'm glad you like the Doughnuttor! It has different filling options, including Honey, Chocolate, Jam, Jelly, and Icee. Idk how the Icee flavor tastes, you'll have to tell me. **

It's Kai's turn to have sparkly eyes. "Yum~" He says, and fires the donuttor. A giant Icee filled donut lands on Father, who moans in pain. Quickly, Kai eats the donut, and smiles. "The Icee filled donut tastes AMAZING!" He squeals, and launches another one at Envy.

**Kimblee- I have another one for you. You have to create a commercial (You can include anyone in the humiliation) on women's fashion. That means you have to dress up. Doesn't have to be long, so you better type it out Doc!**

"I'll type it out this time," Doc says, "Because I want to see his humiliation~ TO THE COMMERCIAL STUDIO I NEVER KNEW WE HAD!" She shouts, and drags everone to the other studio, after making a pit stop to the changing room.

After filming, Doc brought the tape out to be viewed by the cast.

(This part is in script format)

Kimblee: Are you tired of your boring worn out clothes? (shows video clip of Roy in a prairie dress and looking very frustrated) Well good news! Here's the new line of Kimberlee clothes, made just for you! (shows clip of Edward in new clothes looking very happy)

Kimblee: We have dresses, skirts, shorts, pants, shirts, necklaces, we have it all! (pictures of all the guys in different outfits show up) Just order now and you get it all! That's a $20 value for only $2,9999.99! So order now before it's too late! Whoops it's too late you're slow 'kay bye.

TEEHEE!

**I'm off, but before I go, I have to say, my black cow Adolf did taste very nice as a cheeseburger. The Germans even did all the work for me! And Ling, here. I think you deserve this. *points to Ling and a plate of pasta with garlic bread and meatballs lands in his lap* Enjoy!**

Ling happily scarfs down his pasta, while Doc looks on jealously.

***dissipates***

Lynn notices Doc' look of fury, and quickly changes the subject. "The next review is from **Silvereyedfreak**." And Silver-chan enters.

**Hi *still sad***

**hi doc-née Sei-née, and Kai-nii.**

Doc's look of jealously towards Ling is replaced with a look of sadness. "Hi, Silver-chan."

**Hi Envy *shyly kisses him***

Envy doesn't do anything. (He won't admit it, but he likes it~ ;))

**may I sing missing by Evanescence **

Sei nods. "Of course." She quickly turns on the music. Silver-chan began to sing "Missing."

When the song's over, Doc starts to cry.

"Sis, you're over reacting. It's a song." Kai scoffs.

Doc smacked Kai. "I'm not over reacting! … Okay, maybe a little, but it's a really sad song! I'll miss you, Silver-chan!" And Doc starts to cry like crazy. Kai sighed, and brought out a plate of pasta. Doc immediately perked up, and took the pasta.

"I'm telling you, she's bipolar…"

**Can I castrate Roy he's cheating on Kaede**

"I. AM. NOT. CHEATING. ON. KAEDE! IT'S ANOTHER STORY!" Roy protests.

Lynn smiles wryly. "Sure thing, jelly bean." Roy's eyes get wide, and he starts running for his life.

**Everyone gets to beat up the boys who were being pervy**

All the girls glare at the guys, who gulp, and follow Roy into the rainforest, screaming "AAAAAHHHHH!"

**Oh yeah a lot of the anime fans at school were asking why I like Envy so much so here's the reason: I can relate to him in many ways. Not being wanted by your parents a mistake a other sibling replacing you and they just ignore being misunderstood, just wanting scream from the pain. Also he looks cute in his oufit. **

Doc starts to cry again. "IT'S SO SAD!" Kai slaps his sister.

"BE QUIET! THIS ISNT MARLEY AND ME!" He shouts. Doc lies unmoving, and everyone starts to think that she's dead. Then Doc wakes up, and starts attacking Kai. "OUCH! IM SORRY! FAH! MY SQUESSILY SPOOCH! AGAIN!"

**BaiBai wish me luck I'm really going to need thus time around :(**

Doc stops attacking Kai, and looks sad again. "Good luck, hon." Kai gets up painfully, and looks at the camera. "The last set of dares is from **Sushi Hawkeye**. Ouch…"

**A five-foot tall girl with short black hair and brown eyes come in.**

**"Uh is this the right place?"**

**A young redhead neko chimera with gold eyes follows about a foot away, fidgeting and picking at her cream-colored coat.**

**"I don't know, you never brought me here before."**

**"Oh yeah," the first girl remembers. "Yeah, this is the right place."**

**The chimera girl perked up instantly, as if her nervousness was a facade. Which it was.**

**"Hello Doc, Sei, Lynn, Kai." she smiled. "Do you have an empty pool, preferably the one that skaters use? We need it for a few dares."**

Sei nods. "It's in that room." She points to a door marked 'Skating Rink.'

**"Thanks! Now I'll just set these stuff up..." she mumbled, already working on something.**

**The black-haired girl shook her head.**

**"She didn't even introduce herself because of her because of her excitement. Her name is Raied."**

**"Call me Rai!" Raied shouted out, still working on something.**

"Hi Rai." Everyone choruses. Doc chuckles. "Heh, that rhymed~"

**"Yeah. Anyway, I'm sure you guys still remember me, right? Anyway, I just had to bring my OC here, she wanted to dare people. Hey Rai, are you done?"**

**"Yup!" she smiled, showing a few skateboards. One was red and had a black flamel. Another was dark blue with flames. There was one that stood out- it had a beach background and a palm tree with coconuts was at the foreground of the design. It had the red image of a snake biting its own tail.**

Everyone stares at the skateboards. "Wow…"

**"Well, what do you want them to do, Rai?" Sushi asked.**

**"Well, if I remember, you told me that Ed was taught to use a skateboard." Rai recalled.**

"Yeah, and I still know how to." Ed said, crossing his arms.

**"Good. Because you're teaching everyone else. Especially Roy, Al, Envy, Riza, Havoc." the chimera declared, pointing out the people she called. "The boards are decorated that one look you know who owns it."**

**Meanwhile, in the background, Sushi had fallen asleep talking to Al. She was seated between Al and the icee machine. One of Al's cats, Cot, hopped onto her shoulder, causing her head to fall on Al's shoulder. Mei saw and was glaring daggers at the sleeping girl.**

**The chimera companion of Sushi noticed, and sighed.**

**"Second day of school, and she's got tons of homework. Glad I'm not in school. At least Izumi doesn't give homework." she smiled.**

**"Okay, get to work Ed."**

"Roy, Riza, Al, Havoc, Envy, come here! Or I will kick your asses through the camera!" Ed shouts.

Roy cheered because he'd get a break from paperwork.

Riza rolled her eyes at Mustang's victory dance.

Envy snorted but went to Ed.

Al got up, gently setting the still sleeping guest on a couch that conveniently appeared, and went over to his brother.

"Okay, maggots, we are going to learn how to skateboard." Ed starts to teach them.

**-after Ed taught everyone-**

**"Now I dare all of you to use this pool as a skating ramp and do exhibitions and stuff. You get what I'm saying, right?" Rai asked. "Good. The one who impresses me and the hosts most will win 5 dare passes. Which will not affect Sushi's dares. Nor mine."**

The hosts beckoned Rai over to a judges table placed in the skating room, and offered her a seat. "LETS GET STARTED!" Kai shouts.

**-after contest-**

**"Ed wins the contest. Therefore, here are your passes. As a second place prize for Al, chocolate and a stuffed kitty." Rai announced. **

Ed quickly fist pumps while the rest just stands there, jealousy evident in their expressions. Especially Roy's. "THIS WAS RIGGED! I DEMAND A RECOUNT! NO FAIR NO FAIR NO FAIR!"

**"Second dare of mine, I dare Ed to scrub the pool spotless."**

Edward stops his victory dance and stares at Rai in shock. "WHAT?!"

**She pointed at the now filthy pool, then threw a wet sponge at him, barely hitting him.**

**Ed grumbled, going to work.**

**-after that dare-**

**"Now Ed, I dare you to milk cows so that there will be enough milk to fill this pool."**

Edward grumbles, but does his dare.

**-next dare-**

**"Last, I dare you to jump in."**

**At that statement, Sushi rolled of tin couch and fell on the floor, waking up.**

**"Aw, I fell asleep? Sorry for being lethargic, Physics and Chemistry together is hell." she explained, rubbing her neck sore from being bent over, writing in her notebook.**

**While people were distracted, and by people Rai meant Ed, Rai pushed the elder Elric into the pool. The pool without a ladder and filled with milk.**

**"Well, what'd I miss? Hopefully someone took some footage..." Sushi asked, rubbing her eyes.**

Sei smirks and nods. "Oh hell yeah we got footage."

**"Thanks, Sei." **

**"Bye!" Rai waved.**

"Later!" Doc calls. "Well this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, and the lights fade out as "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: Definitely takes longer to type… PM if you have dares, review if you don't!**

**~DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympian s, seikatsu-chan, rachLA, and Kai**


	3. Lean on Me

**A/N: So far, so good. Only two people who reviewed instead of PMing me. I appreciate reviews, but please, PM me if you have dares and such. :)**

Lights flare on and Doc jumps down from the ceiling, landing on her face. Quickly, she scrambles off the floor, dusting herself off. She smiles at the camera. "Hello, and welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone comes running out as the "Fight as One" starts to play. Doc smiles.

"The first set of dares today is from **animelover102.**" She says, and animelover and Lucy walk in.

**So doc its me animelover, you said pm so i can dare people right? so here i go**

**anyway first up Lucy my list plz **

**¨here's your list¨ Lucy says**

**ok great so lets start off with my torture gun for Roy and envy *starts**

**blasting them with the gun* haha told ya id get revenge**

Roy and Envy get hit full in the face with the guns, rendering them to hilarious coma-like states.

"NO! DON'T LET THE LLAMA GET ME!" Envy shrieks, while Roy is mumbling about a bad circus experience. Meanwhile, Doc is videotaping with a smirk on her face.

**¨Once again your hyper right¨ Lucy said**

**Ok listen for reals Lucy this time im not eating chocolate **

**¨Fine ill believe you for now¨ Lucy said**

**Ok lets make this quick i have to study for my exam this Wednesday so im really nervous **

**¨Yup she has to study or ill use my vectors on her¨ Lucy said**

**Ya and you Roy and envy know how that feels**

At the word 'vectors,' Roy and Envy start crying for their mothers.

**Ok quick dares: i dare ed to drink milk**

"No." Ed states. "I refuse." Kai grins maliciously.

"Do you want to go to the Sue pit instead?" He asks, and Ed pales visibly, grabbing a glass of milk from Kai's hand. "Oi! That was my milk!" He whines, and Ed glares at him.

**I dare Winry to smack herself since im not a big fan of her**

Winry takes a second to glare at animelover, but then quickly slaps herself.

**Al here's another turtle once again if ed doesn't let you doc can i come and smack him again **

Doc looks over at Al, who's playing with his two turtles and all his cats and bunnies, and then looks at Ed, who's scowling, but not doing anything about it. "Nah, I don't think that you need to.

**¨this time im only going to see how she smacks him¨ Lucy said**

**ok this is the end and now i shall study and watch brotherhood bye :)**

Sei waves to the retreating girls, then looks back at the camera. "The next review is from **Silvereyedfreak**." And Silver-chan walks in with a guy.

**Wooh I made this one with acquaintance!**

Lynn looks at the guy. "I'm taking it that that's him?"

**Silver-Chan: Hi Doc-nee,Sei-nee,Kai-nii *looks at Envy sadly***

"Hi Silver-chan!" Doc says happily. "Hi, What's-your-face!"

**Shayne: hey weirdos!**

**Silver-Chan: Be nice!**

Envy: why's the girl ignoring me?

**Shayne: Well cross-dressing palm she is convinced that she annoys you and so in order to not have you be annoyed is to leave you alone.**

Envy sighs. "Why does everyone take it personally? I hate everyone!"

**Silver-Chan: Dares: **

**I can stay at this studio too?**

Doc smiles. "Sure! Have some fun in the green room! There's Hi-Def surround sound, a wii, a kinect, and a mini fridge stocked with everything!" Kai glares at Doc.

"And why didn't you tell me about this room of awesomeness?"

"Because you are undeserving of it." Doc replies, sticking out her tongue.

**Roy go to rehab you are too much of a pervert.**

Roy just stares at Silver-chan. "I am not a pervert! I am just a man who enjoys the company of beautiful women!" He protests.

"That's pretty much a pervert…" Everyone else replies. Then Kai gets an idea and kicks Roy to the rehabilitation center that no one ever knew was there.

**Therapy and beat up the boys for the girls who the boys saw at the bathhouse**

All the girls turned to the males, a fiery aura surrounding them.

"Oh crap… SWIM AWAY!" The boys shouted, and jumped into a large pool and swam to the other side. But waiting for them, was Lan Fan, Mei and Sei, with very large and pointy weapons. "Eep!"

~The authoress has decided not to show this scene due to violence, pain, and all that other crap that doesn't exactly belong in a T fic~

**Singing Time! I dib missing by Evanesence! **

Doc smiles and drops Kai into the pile of beat up boys. "SONG TIME~ We shall do a whole song that shall encompass Ask and Dare!" She cheered.

"Um, do we have a song like that?" Lynn asked nervously.

"Sure! It's called We are Young!" Doc replied.

"Isn't that about a bar and stuff?"

"So? But first, we shall do Silver-chan's." Doc said, and turned on the music. Silver-chan started to sing "Missing."

When she finished, Doc wiped a few tears away. "Now before I start bawling, I have changed the song to "Lean on Me."" She sniffled, and played the music, and she started to sing.

**Shayne: palm tree you have to be nice to silver-Chan she's sensitive!**

Envy scoffed. "I kind of got that. Stupid humans." The girls looked at him. "What?"

"Why didn't we beat you up earlier?"

"… Crap."

"YAAAAAAH!" The girls scream, and start chasing Envy around.

**Oh yeah Kimblee blow stuff up!**

Kimblee manages to pick himself out of the pile, and blows up a lot of stuff that stops the girls from chasing Envy.

"The next set of reviews is from **Devil'sEyeAlchemist.**" Kai groans, and picks himself out of the pile. "Ow… Who knew that they could pack that big of a punch..?"

**You say in your review that there's an Ask and Dare 3, and that 2 was deleted.**

**Well, in another window that I have currently open, I have 2's reviews and I'm**

**actually reading it now. It's amazing they found you already. **

Doc sighs, and places her head on a randomly placed desk. "I think that they have under close watch now… Sucks to be me."

**Oh, right!**

**Dares!**

**Ed-Drink a whole bottle of vodka**

Sei holds out a large bottle of Russian vodka, which Edward grabs, and chugs.

~a few seconds later~

"An' tha's how I-I" Ed says, his voice slurred from the alcohol. "Wha? Wha wa I gonna say?" He wonders, then faints.

**Al- Join Ed with thata**

This time Lynn holds out the vodka, and Al looks at his unconscious brother. Al shrugs, and chugs the bottle.

~an hour later~

"Haha, bro, those were good times!" Al laughed. Doc smirked.

"This reminds me of a song that Ed and Al should sing." She mused. Sei glared at her.

"No. Country. Songs." She said.

"Aw."

**Roy- Go to McDonald's, buy one of everything on the menu to go, and pay them**

**in pennies!**

Roy sighed, and grabbed a large jar of pennies. "Fine." He said, and went off to McDonalds.

At the restaurant things weren't going well.

"I told you, you're holding up the line!" The clerk said. Actually, shouted.

"And I told you, I wanna buy stuff!" Roy replied, and continued to count out his pennies. "92,000, 92001, 92002-"

"JUST HURRY UP!"

"NOW YOU MADE ME LOSE TRACK! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7-"

"GAH!"

**Riza: Go to a classy restaurant and do the same.**

~this scene has been deleted due to Riza shooting the crap out of the waiter because he annoyed her~

**Mage of Hope's OC's- Here's a three day pass to the Great Escape.**

Zack grabbed the passes. "YES!" He screamed. "TO THE GREAT ESCAPE!" He shouted, and grabbed Cole, Crystal, and Leila, heading to the Great Escape.

**Kimblee- You have another shipment of dynamite.**

Kimblee smiled, thinking about all the stuff he could blow up with his new dynamite.

Meanwhile, Kai was screwing around with it. "What does this do-" BOOM! "… Never mind…"

**Greedling- Make me another sandwich**

GreedLing shrugs and heads off to the kitchen, coming back a few minutes later with a PB+J.

**Ling- Make Rin a sandwich.**

GreedLing went back to the kitchen and came back a minute later with a PB+Nutella sandwich.

**Greed- Here! *hands him a bag of gold* I robbed the US Tresaury.**

Guards: WHO STOLE THE MONEY?! *sees Greed with bag* GET HIM!

Greed: Thanks a lot! *sarcasm* Then Greed ran away, screaming that no one could catch him because he is the gingerbread homunculus of awesomeness.

**I think that's all. Oh, wait! Kai, here's $50. Go to Legoland and have fun.**

"LEGOOOOOOS!" Kai screamed, and grabbed the money, running off to Legoland. But first, he crashed into the wall.

"Boys." Lynn sighed. "The last review is from **kuttiepie3**."

**"Why hello my torture subjects." Says a girl in an epic blue dragon ninja**

**oufit with cat ears**

"Hello." Everyone replies.

**"Well for my first dare I'd like to, to balance the universe out put kai in a**

**cage out of arms reach of the Icee machine."**

Kai looks at kuttiepie. "But I have to go to Legoland!" He protests.

"That can wait." Sei says, and throws him into the cage.

A few minutes later, Kai went absolutely crazy. "GRAH! GRAH! ICEE! LEGOLAND! GRAH!" He screeched, almost exactly like a monkey.

"NEVAH!"

**"Same with Ling." Says a girl who is wearing a red dragon ninja oufit with dog**

**ears."**

Lynn grabbed Ling, and threw him into a separate cage, minus his sword, and locked it. "No food for you." She stated.

A few seconds later, Ling went Sky Goddess.

**"Bri-chan!" Shouts kuttiepie**

**"Well bye bye!" Kuttiepie shouts as she vanished out of sight like a ghost.**

**"Yeah whatever." Says Bri-chan as she walks out the window**

"Bye, girls!" Doc calls, then turns to the cameras. "Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers, and "The A-Team Theme" plays as the lights dim out.

**A/N: I CAN UPDATE AGAIN! PM if you have dares, Review if ya don't!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	4. Snowballs and Houses of Meat

**A/N: I really need to fix my swivel chair, but I keep putting it off… Oh well.**

**Please, PM IF YOU HAVE DARES! DO NOT REVIEW! REVIEW IF YOU DON'T HAVE DARES!**

All is quiet, until Doc falls out of the large closet, with a party hat and a bottle of root beer. She quickly gets up, and starts the intro.

"Hello, and welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone swarms out of the closet as "Fight as One" plays.

"Heheh, the first set of dares is from **Maruki Shitoichi**." Lynn says.

**Maru waks in with an apology gifts in her hand for everyone, "Hi ya, Doc-San"**

**she said, as she gives the gifts to everyone.**

Sei looks at the gifts. "Not that I'm ungrateful, but what are these for?"

**"It's for the' other two chapters" she replied, "Since, you know, I go**

**psycho"**

"Oh."

**"And yes, yes you did" said Natsumi, with a bored expression on her face.**

**"Well," as Maru pulled out a Dares/ Truths list, "Fist one, is dares!" she**

**said, as she pointed her finger to Winry.**

**"Winry, in every FMA or FMAB anime I've ever seen, you'll always hits Ed with**

**a wrench. Is that correct?"**

"Yes." Winry replies. "Yes I do."

**"Then," "I dare you to use something else, other than your wrench to hit Ed,**

**for 3 chapters" as she smirks to Ed.**

Winry nods, and puts down her wrench, replacing it with a hammer.

**"And, the next one is Al," she continued.**

**"If I gave you a chubby and cute hamster, will you keep it for me?" as she**

**does her 'puppy eyes' act to Al, "Pretty please?"**

Al nods. "Of course I will!" He says. "I love hamsters!"

"I thought you said that you love cats, bunnies, and turtles?" Roy asks.

"I do. I love all animals!" Al responds.

**"Yay~! Thanks Al~!" as she glomps Al.**

"Heheh, you're welcome."

**"Okay, this is the last one," Natsumi said "For now..."**

**"Ling, I don't know why, but" as she hands Ling a house of meat, "Eat it, in**

**two seconds, or it'll disappear"**

**"Don't you mean, 'It'll be eaten by Gluttony, Natsu-Chan?" Maru asked**

**innocently to Natsumi.**

**As her sweat drops, "Never mind..."**

Ling and Gluttony both eye the meat house, and make a run for it. Unfortunatley, Kai gets there first, and eats it all.

**Then both of them waves to Doc and her peeps, "Bye~!"**

"Bye! Thanks for the snack!" Kai calls. "The next set of dares is from **Talon Graveshadow**."

**Ah, so it's story format now? Very well.**

"Yup." Lynn says.

**I only have one dare as of now, but it is for everyone.**

**Band together in an army, and attempt to fight...**

**Talon dramatically whips a towel off of a cage, revealing... A cucco.**

"… It's just a chicken…" Edward says.

**Seriously, it's much harder than you think.**

Doc shrugs, and everyone bands together. "ATTACK!" Everyone attacks the cucco, and the demon chicken defeats them all. Like a boss.

**Anywho, tell me if I did anything wrong Doc, okay?**

"Nah, you did good." Doc nods. "Now if I could get the stupid cucco dead…"

**See ya later!**

Sei waves. "Bye! The next dares are from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**."

***scratching at the door***

***door opens, no ones there***

"OMIGOD! IT'S A GHOST AT THE DOOR!" Kai screams, and drops into a fetal position. "Mommy…"

***cool breeze blows through the door***

***snow ball comes out of nowhere and hits Ed right in the face***

Edward brushes the snow off his face. "What the hell?"

**Aka-STRKE! Nice one Yuki!**

**Yuki-I'm going to be the newest character in Aka's story, I'm one of Roy's**

**officers.**

**Emi-Hey Mustang, catch!*tosses a snow ball to Roy***

Roy nods, and gets ready to catch the snowball.

**Yuki-Wait for it...*snow ball turns into a ball of water and pops in Roy's**

**face***

Roy blinks, as he is now wet.

**All-*laughing***

**Aka-Ehem. Ok then, moving on. Ed, umm, uh, ANGEL! **

**Angel-Yeah?**

**Aka-Think of something.**

**Angel-Ok. Ed, Roy, fight!**

**Emi-BUT, some rules.**

**Yuki-You two cant use alchemy. only physical combat.**

**Aka-Al, Make sure the fight doesnt get out of hand.**

Doc holds up a hand. "WAIT! This shall not take place in the studio. It shall take place… on the planet… BLORCH!" With that, Doc presses a button, and the two men are teleported away.

"Where's the planet Blorch?" Alphonse asked.

"It's the home of the slaughtering rat people." Kai answers. "Haven't you ever seen Invader Zim?"

"You are evil…"

"I know~"

**Yuki-Havoc, no smoking till the end of next chapter.**

Havoc sighed. "I don't smoke anymore!"

**Emi-Envy,...nevermind, i got nothing.**

Envy scoffed. "Typical- wait, what? Nothing? YES!"

**Aka- No you dont. Envy, You cant call Ed in any way/form short for two whole**

**chapters.**

**Angel-But if you do...**

**All four-Ed can once again beat the hell out of you!**

"Aw…"

**Emi-Riza, tazer Roy.**

Riza nods, and waits for Roy to come back. A few seconds later, a portal appears, and Roy and Ed run out, followed by a hoard of slaughtering rat people.

"CLOSE THE PORTAL! CLOSE IT!" Edward screams, and Doc closes the portal. Meanwhile, Sei takes a cattle prod, and sticks the rat people into a room. When questioned, she simply replied that it was for extra torture.

**yuki-Well,**

**Angel-Thats all,**

**Aka-For now.**

**All-Bye!*take out snow balls and throw it at random people then dissapears when no one is looking***

Doc wipes snowball off her face. "When did we get snow on the moon?"

"No idea. But then again, when did we get a rainforest?"

"Good point. The last dares are from **rachLA**."

**Okay...Wow. Story formatt for this story is strange...XD**

Doc nods. "Yes, yes it is. But on the bright side, none of the people from Critics united are on my ass yet."

**Anyway, I have some dares...**

**Ed: You have to give Mustang at least three compliments before the end of the**

**show.**

Edward groans. "This episode? Fine. Let's make this quick. Mustang, you're not a bastard, you're not useless all the time, and you're less of an ass than I say you are."

"Wow. That was the nicest thing I've ever heard you say."

"Shut up. THAT WAS TORTURE!"

**STOP COMPLAINING, IT'S NOT TORTURES!**

"YES IT WAS!"

**Havoc: Aaaaaw! You aren't smoking anymore because of me! That's so sweet! 3**

***goes off into ramble about how sweet Havoc is***

Havoc smiles proudly, and gives Lynn a hug.

**ALL THE GIRLS WHO DUMPED HIM ARE IDIOTS! I love you!**

All the girls just roll their eyes. "Whatever."

**XD**

**Hawkeye: Anyway, I was thinking about how much you and Lan Fan have in common!**

**Plus, the girls of FMA are so badass they should get to talk about it! Izumi,**

**Olivier, Winry, Hawkeye, Lan Fan, and Mei! You 6 have to talk with each other**

**(and the hosts!) about your guys! I'm sure that you know exactly what I mean**

**when I say your guys...Well, Olivier...you are forced to talk about Miles...3**

Olivier glares at Lynn, and points her sword at her.

**YOU'RE A CUTE COUPLE! DON'T YOU WAVE YOUR SWORD AT ME!**

"Shut up." Olivier growls.

"… We should get to the meeting now…" Sei says, and drags Olivier away.

**Ahem, that's about it for now...XD MUAHAHAHAHA!**

**Love you, Havoc!**

"Love ya too, honey!" Havoc says. Doc smiles.

"This has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone says, and the girls go to a separate room to talk about their guys. The lights dim out as "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: I fixed my swivel chair of awesomeness. Yes. Pm if you have dares, Review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	5. Crazy Parties

**A/N: I should be doing other things… But I'm not. :) **

Doc does a one handed cartwheel into the camera's view, and falls on her face. She gets up, muttering about always falling on her face. She then looks at the camera, and smiles. "Hello! Sorry about that… Well, this is another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! WHOOO!" Everyone screams, and runs onscreen.

Sei smiles. "The first message is from **RubySaphireMoon**."

***Jumps out of nowhere and throws Roy into a safety capsule* **

Roy has a 'WTF' look on as he is thrown in.

***yells at Silvereyedfreak* NO! You can't castrate him! I called marrying his son! *slaps silver* Ok, now that thats over...**

Doc gives Ruby the kicked puppy look. "Why?"

Sei sighs. "I doubt he will ever have a son, though… He will most likely have a daughter."

**Ed & Roy- Why would you want to go through the torture device of swirling evil monkies and destructive doom? **

"That name is too long…"

**IT DOES NOT HAVE TOO LONG A NAME! AND, Because I thought you hated each other! So, here are your options. You can stop being stupid little twits and be nice to each other, or you can go through the spitfire, eye eating pigs, firey ditch, and icy cliff with robo-crocodiles, your pick!**

"… There, there, Roy." Ed said, and awkwardly hugs Roy, who awkwardly hugs back. And then Doc snaps a picture.

**Truth- Here, you get a lollypop. *Hands a white lollypop* **

Truth nods, taking the lollipop.

**Kimblee- Wonderful commercial. I got some footage of Roy in that outfit. Seriously, what you have to do to get him into a ruffley pink dress? ... wow...**

Kimblee smiled. "You would be surprised the amount of blackmail I have on him. Well, the stuff that Doc has." Doc just nods.

**Alphonse- DAMMIT! YOU'RE TOO F*ING CUTE! *bear hugs* *runs over to Doc and swipes Alphonses photo album of cuteness* IT'S MINE! ALL MINE! *Hugs the photo album* **

Doc nods slowly and backs away. "Okay. Just calm down, and the tranquilizer dart won't have to be used…"

Alphonse smiles awkwardly. "Thanks… I think…"

**Maes- *pokes repeatedly* I FINALLY found something cuter than Elicia! Mwahahaha! *holds up photo album of Alphonse's cuteness* HE'S TOO CUTE! *runs up to Roy and starts gushing about baby Alphonse* (read really fast) Isn't he just the darlingist thing! And look how cute he is in that outfit! He looks just like his older brother, and look here! He's being cradled by Ed! He's so adorable and- *gets slapped* OWWW! *rubs cheek* Thanks Doc, I suppose I deserved that...**

"Hell yeah, you did!" Doc says, and Roy and Maes nod in agreement.

**Father- *sends through swirling evil monkies and destructive doom torture device* **

"Now what was that for?" Father asks.

**Shut up. You know what that was for. *kicks into corrupt Mary Sue Pit* Have fun down there!**

Father kills all the Mary Sues. So Lynn and Sei stick Father into the room of slaughtering rat people. Who have been infused with Philosopher's Stones. :3

**Eh... I have to go make dinner...*is grumbling something about stupid dads and how they can't cook just cause mom isn't home* **

Kai sighs. "Tell me about it."

***Sigh* Alright...bye...And Roy, you and Riza get busy! I'm gonna Marry your son, Dammit! *Turns into potted plant* wait, thats not right...Oh, here! *presses button and vaporizes***

"… I'm pretty sure that I'm not going to have kids…" Roy states.

"The next thing of stuff is from **animelover102**." Kai says.

**DOC IM BACK AND BETTER AND IM NOT NERVOUS ANYMORE**

"YAY!"

**calm down anime lucy said**

**ok ok im ok so lucy first things first**

**ok here says lucy *gives list of dares***

**thanks *grabs list of dares***

**winry- no need for glaring i have my reasons to hate you**

Winry just glares.

**ya the fact that you like... *covers mouth***

**lucy dont say anything ok its a top classified secret that anyone can use it**

**as blackmail**

**-.- *sigh* sorry i know lucy said**

Doc giggles evilly. "I think I know what it is~"

**ok whos next oh ya al**

**al- yay im so glad you like my turtles i hope you take good care of them ok**

Al nods and gives a thumbs up.

**ed- sorry for daring you to drink milk dude i just had to dare you ok**

Ed also glares.

**roy and envy- BEWARE THE VECTORS MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA**

Roy and Envy cower before the might of the evil vectors.

**anime you too are scared of the vectors lucy said**

**i know but you wouldnt hurt me right *looks at her with puppy dog eyes***

***sigh* no i wouldnt hurt you -.- lucy said**

**ok well this wraps things up sorry doc i didnt give enough dares its just that**

**IM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS... anyway peace out bye :3**

"LATER!" Doc shouts. "The next dares are from **Dragonlover71491**, who has found her way back, and needs to PM me." Doc says. "Not that I'm accusing anyone…"

**(Black dragon flies in, landing on Bradley in the process)**

Bradley screams in pain, and everyone else laughs.

**Sorry that your show/story got deleted, twice, but I'm back baby! And I have**

**something for Kai. (Smooches Doc's little brother on the cheek.) I never**

**forgot how he complimented me, so I'm rewarding the sweetie.**

Kai lightly blushes, and Doc sighs dramatically. "For tis a shame that my story had been deleted before you had the chance to see it."

**Now down to business! Let's turn Riza into a real hawk and train her in**

**falconry. Look it up, it's way cool.**

Sei grins. "Oh, heck yeah!" She says, and turns Riza into a falcon, who flies around, using her talons to kill target dummies.

"… TO THE FALCONRY!" Kai screams, and grabs Riza by her legs. Riza screeches in protest, and starts to claw on Kai's arm. "OUCH!" He cries, and lets go of Riza, who then flies back to the dummies and kills them.

"… I think that she already has it down…"

**Next, let's bury Edward at the beach!**

Lynn snaps her fingers and suddenly everyone is in beach wear. And Riza is back in human form, and wearing a black one piece (lol). The males start to drool over Lust's tiny bikini.

"TO THE BEACH I NEVER KNEW WE HAD!" Doc screams, and grabs Ed's arm, pulling him to the sandy shore which shouldn't' exist. She lets go, and Ed falls down. Then, everyone starts to shovel dirt onto Ed's body. In a matter on minutes, Ed is covered in sand, unable to get up.

Kai gets an evil idea and starts to mold the sand into the body of a mermaid, which gets Ed angry, but he cannot get up~

**And finally, time for the homunculi to do the hula!**

Now the homunculi are wearing grass skirts and coconut bras. Sei turns on music, and all the homunculi hula.

**I'm done for now. (Morphs into dragon and flies toward the ceiling, shooting a**

**hole in it with fire breath.)**

"YOU FOOL!" Sei cries. "WE SHALL RUN OUT OF OXYGEN!"

**And Riza, look what I got!**

**(Holds out Riza's diary.) Surprisingly, there's quite a bit of steamy stuff in**

**here. Naughty, naughty Hawkeye.**

**(Bullet whizzes by my ear.) I gotta go! (Flies away and seals up hole with**

**magic.)**

"… Better." Sei umbles.

"The last dare-a-ma-bob is from **Maruki Shitoichi**." Lynn states.

**Maru walks in with a slurpee machine, "Hi again, Doc-San" she says, with a cat**

**smile on her face.**

"Hola!" Doc replies.

**"And~!" then Maru gave Doc her Slurpee machine, "It's for you Doc-San~!"**

Doc catches the machine, groaning under the weight. "Thank you!"

**"You can make drinks, just like an icee machine, but it could turn into a**

**small box when you press the blue button, so you can take it anywhere" she**

**explained**

Doc gasps, and presses the said button. The Slurpee machine turns into a tiny box, and Kai squeals.

**"No dares today," Natsumi continued, as they heard a sighing of relief from**

**the casts.**

"Yay!"

**"Have a barbecue and camping party/trip at/to the forest"**

**"Bye!" Maru and Natsumi said in unison**

Everyone looks at the girls, the shrugs.

"TO THE FOREST I NEVER KNEW WE HAD! AND BRING THE SLURPEES!" Kai says, then runs into the forest. "OOH! MOSQUITOS!"

Doc facepalms, then turns to the camera. "Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone says, and runs into the forest while the lights fade out and "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: I really have to clean my desk… *head desk* PM if you have dares, review if ya don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	6. The Old Switcheroo

**A/N: WE HAVE A NEW COVER! It is drawn by raingirl777! :D Ain't it awesome? From left to right, from top to bottom, it is Me, Sei, Lynn, Kai, Winry, Ed, Al. :D **

Doc runs onscreen, with a smile on her face, until she trips over a stray Icee cup and falls on her face. She gets, up, scowling and muttering about how she was going to kill her brother, then she turns back to the camera and smiles. "Hello, and this is another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone screams, and runs out.

Doc laughs. "The first set of dares are from **Sushi Hawkeye**."

**Sushi and Rai roll into the studio, unknowingly followed by two teens.**

**"it's party time!" the girls shouted, popping streamers in Envy's face.**

Envy grumbles and rubs the streamers out of his face.

**"Hm, so this is the place you to go to..." one of the teens, a blond with natural black highlights and brown and blue eyes, mused.**

"Who's that?" Lynn asked. "And that?"

**Sushi was too busy emptying the rootbeer in the fridge and Rai was playing with Al's pets, therefore, they didn't notice him.**

"Waitaminute… MY ROOT BEER!" Kai screeched, and went to stop Sushi.

**The other teen, a girl taller than the boy, had black hair with natural blonde highlights and the same eyes.**

"Okay seriously, who's that?" Lynn asked again.

**"Okay, you got to see where they were going, now can we get back to the library?" she said, crossing her arms.**

**One of Al's pets scampered over to the newcomers, and Rai followed.**

**"Hey, there you are." she said looking up. "Oh! Sushi, the twins followed us here. Did you leave the knife again?"**

**"Uh... I may have forgotten about it with the excitement of surviving school for a week?" she said, rubbing the back of her head.**

**Rai sighed. "Yes, well they followed us through the open rift. And they haven't showed up in your story yet!"**

**"Wait, I haven't updated that? Alright, you two! Give me the knife and go back to your universe. I haven't made you guys show up yet. Shoo."**

**and with that, the twins were shoved into a rift in time and space.**

**"Okay, now that's taken care of, dares." Sushi declared.**

"Um… Okay…"

**"I'm glad you asked about the knife. Do any of you know about 'His Dark Materials'? The story with daemons as people's souls?" Rai replied, twirling the said knife in her hand.**

"No."

**"Yes, well this knife is indeed the Subtle Knife." Sushi said. "And now, I shall put hit away."**

**"Anyway, dares." Rai pushed an orange button and a hologramic list showed in front of the cast.**

**Then they ran off to do pranks on everyone they deem fit to be pranked.**

"Pranks. cool."

**List:**

**Envy- because we hate you, you will become Ed's servant until he says so.**

"Can I hurt him?" Envy asked.

**And no, you cannot harm him.**

"Grr. Then I shall simply annoy him until he lets me go."

**-meanwhile-**

**Ed poured himself a glass of water in a white mug. Only when he took a sip, he spat the liquid back out.**

**"What the? Why did it turn to milk?" he asked, scowling.**

**Sushi and Rai giggled and revealed that the mug wasn't really empty, but filled with milk powder, and when Ed added water, it mixed.**

**Then they ran off to the next destination of their prank fest, Rai inviting others to join so that they can be prank-proof.**

"DARN YOU, PRANKERS!"

**-back to the list-**

**Olivier- had any fun with your pink sword?**

Olivier nodded. "It adds to the fear factor."

**Roy- wear a pink sparkly tiny miniskirt.**

"I don't wanna!" Roy protested.

**What, you don't want to? Fine.**

**Riza- tazer if non-compliant.**

Riza glares at Roy, who gulps in fear. Then runs away screaming like a little girl!

**-after being tazered-**

**Roy opened the door to the Costumes Room and water fell onto him, followed by a metal bucket that covered his head. He fumed with anger and chased Ed and the two girls around the room.**

**"Nothing beats the classic!" Ed cheered, still running while laughing.**

**Riza caught up to Roy and tazered him. "Sir, miniskirt, now." she ordered, holding up a sparkly pink tiny miniskirt.**

**Roy groaned and after being tazered a third time, he changed into the garment.**

Unknown to everyone, Doc and Sei were stalking the pranks, and taking pictures for future blackmail.

**-list-**

**Last one is for two people.**

**Ed and Roy- dress as each other, act like each other, and be each other. In other words, spend the day in the other person's body.**

**-end list-**

**The hologram fizzled out and disappeared.**

**Rai and Sushi snapped their fingers at the same time and then Ed and Roy looked down.**

**Roy, or should I say Ed, looked at Ed, aka Roy, evilly. Complete with the evil grin.**

**Roy in Ed's body looked up at Ed in Roy's body and gulped.**

**"Please write the events, just a few everyday things like Winry hitting 'Ed' with a wrench and Riza threatening 'Roy' to do paperwork." Sushi requested of Doc.**

**"Before we forget." Rai shot the cast except Ed and Roy and the hosts with an amnesia ray. "So that only you guys will know who's who."**

**"Have fun!" the seafood and feline duo shouted, using the Subtle Knife to get to Rai's verse, closing the rift from the other side.**

"… What the hell just happened?" Winry asked.

"Well, Sushi and Rai just-" Doc began, then Sei slapped duct tape over her mouth. "Mmh mm mph!"

"Do NOT tell her! I shall only say that Roy is about to go on a perv spree and Edward is about to break his automail." Sei said, and Riza got her taser ready, and Winry got her wrench ready. They started to chase Roy and Ed, who ran like hell.

"Heheh, the next set of dares is from **Dragonlover71491**." Sei said. "This'll be fun to watch~"

***A large capsule materializes* *steps out* Hello, my wonderful pets...hehe.. *Is playing with very large and sharp needles***

"Ooh~ Sharp, pointy outfits~" Doc said.

**Well, first off, I happen to know quite a lot about needles...and where to stick them to make'm hurt...**

"Heheh, that's a good skill to have~" Doc giggled. "Teach me?"

"No. You are not allowed." Sei frowned, and pulled Doc back.

"Aw…"

***glares at Roy* I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that comment on not having kids. Besides, who's gonna carry on the Mustang legacy? *smirk* no matter. If not, I'll gladly introduce you to my friends...*gestures to over-sized spinal tap needles* **

"Keep reading." Kai says. "We're getting there."

**Ed- Here *snaps * *gives dark chocolate* 's good. No milk. My sympathies with all those terrible milk dares. *sigh* And I guess I can't torture you and Roy about hugs and whatnot anymore..**

"Thank God…"

**Hughes- LET THAT BE A LESSON! To stop gushing...now you feel our pain...hehe :)**

"… I'm still going to do it!" Hughes protested.

**Doc- *snaps and a basket of oranges appears* Hehe, sorry for the trouble last review . I was REALLY high on sugary pancakes. Dude, don't do it. NEVER. Your mind gets screwy. **

Doc's eyes get huge. "O… ran… ges…" She drools, and starts to eat all the oranges in the basket.

"Getting high on sugary pancakes sounds like fun!" Kai says. "I'm going to try it!" He runs to the restaurant and starts to scarf down sugary pancakes.

**Father- I like you now! You killed the Mary-sues! *squeezes the air out of Father in a awkward bear hug* **

"Thanks!" Father wheezes.

**Greedling- Hey, you like chocolate, right?**

"Yes, yes I do." GreedLing says.

**Riza- ... Here- *hands a shiny SSR877* (a sniper, basically) Just incase...that..hot spring incident happens..again...*shivers***

Riza takes the gun and cocks it. "It won't happen again. Not without more male casualties."

***yawn* *Glares at Roy before packing up needles* Well, I have surgery to perform. I'll see ya later! *hops in capsule and blasts out through removable skylight***

"… Who would let her do surgery?" Edward asks no one.

"The next dare stuff is from **Dragonlover71491**." Kai says.

**(Has eyepatch over left eye) Ah, now this brings me back, albeit it's**

**painful.**

Riza nods. "It sure does."

**Now to business, time for you guys to re-enact the "Upendi" scene from Lion**

**King 2. Here's the cast list:**

**Kovu: Edward**

**Kiara: Winry**

**Maes: Rafiki**

**Background: Use whoever because I could care less.**

"Okay." Sei snaps her fingers and Edward and Winry are lions, and Maes is a monkey, and everyone else is a random animal. "NOW SING!"

"Wait, why is Roy with me?" Winry asks. Sei looks around.

"Um, no reason."

And they started to sing.

At the end, Edward and Winry kiss, and Doc squeals with delight, and faints. Kai mutters about his stupid sister, and pours cold water on her face. "WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? HOW? WHY?" Doc asks, turning to look at everyone, who just stares.

"WAITAMINUTE! I JUST KISSED ROY MUSTANG! EW! EW! EW! EW!" Winry screams, and Edward sighs.

"Aw…"

**And just to torture Roy for old times' sake, he has to wear a miniskirt. JUST**

**a miniskirt.**

Roy pouts, and puts on a miniskirt, and takes off his shirt. Doc drools with hearts in her eyes. Sei smacks her. "I did not just do that." Doc says.

"Wait, why is Edward in a miniskirt?"

"NO REASON!"

**Okay, bye!**

"Bye!" Lynn says. "The last dares are from **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**."

**A girl with night colored hair and bronze eyes walks in. "The Devil has entered the building!" She pulls out a bottle of whiskey and tosses it to Roy, who barely catches that. "Don't drop it." She says with a smirk.**

"Why did Edward grab Roy's whiskey?"

"NO REASON!"

**Kai quakes in fear. The cursed girl has arrived. That's right, the devil in...jeans and a t-shirt? Odd.**

**Doc is first to answer the call. "So you're back!" She says with a smile. "Glad to see ya! Whatcha got for stuff?"**

**Kaede speaks. "I first have a disclaimer for RubySaphireMoon. No, Silvereyedfreak will NOT castrate my husband. Yeah, you heard me. Roy Mustang is married to the DEVIL! He sold his soul to me. And we have TWO SONS!"**

**Doc is a little puzzled at her boasting statement. "Who?"**

**"Ed and Alphonse."**

**"Right." **Doc nods, and mentally giggles. 'So right now, Ed is married to Kaede and Roy is her don~ heheh~"

**Kaede turns back to the camera screen. "So hands off my man! He is my flame! Anyway, I came to see insanity and I'm gonna get some! First off! Edward, my son. Seven minutes in heaven in that closet with RIZA HAWKEYE!"**

**Riza displays a look of utter disgust on her face while she loads her AK-47. "What?" She calmly asks.**

**"You heard me. And just so that you don't get any ideas of harming me... hametsu kaen no hosha-ki!" An infamous weapon of hers-the Flamethrower of Doom. "Now get your butts in there and have seven minutes in heaven!" She says angrily as Sei shoves them in the nearest closet.**

~in the closet~

"So," Roy says, "wanna make out?"

"Hell no."

**"Someone seems happy today." Kai says as he rolls his eyes. Another fun day for him.**

**"Glad you talked. I blew up the Icee headquarters."**

**"You WHAT!"**

**"Enjoy your precious Icee machine while it's full... MUAHAHAHAH! Anyway, Alphonse, I dare you to cosplay as Honey-senpai for three chapters."**

**"Why must I be here?" Alphonse asks, but gets no reply.**

While Kai is mourning his beloved Icees, Alphonse if getting into a honey cosplay outfit.

**Sei was next to talk. "Now what?"**

**Kaede gave an evil glare at Sei, who was now deathly afraid of what mischief and malice Kaede had already done or was going to do. "I blew up your lab. Have fun rebuilding all your precious inventions." She then turned to Lynn, who was shivering and who's teeth were chattering. "I also made Havoc smoke again. Enjoy!" Kaede grinned. "Mustang, drink up!"**

**Mustang preceded to reply, "Yes, Kaede-sama!" And finish the whole bottle in ten seconds.**

Edward faints. "Um, I don't think he had that large of a tolerance… He's only 16…" Lynn says. "AND WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU MAKE HAVOC SMOKE?!" She turns to Havoc, who is smoking a cigarette. "HOW DARE YOU!" She slaps him, and knocks the cigarette out, replacing it with gum.

"Wait, why is Roy 16?"

"NO REASON!"

**"I never said all at once. But whatever, the more torture the better. Hey Winry, where are all your tools?"**

**Winry proceeded to look around the studio for five minutes before replying, "They're gone!"**

**Kaede turned her attention to the emo corner, where Kimblee was being roasted on a rotisserie over a cauldron of melted iron. She snickered. "No, they're right there! In that pot! Oops, I melted them. Oh well." **

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Winry cried.

**She turned to Olivier Mira Armstrong, who was looking as cold and ** as ever.**

**"What do you want?" The Northern Wall of Briggs replied harshly.**

**The Devil put her hand out. "The sword."**

**Olivier knew the consequences of not complying with the Devil Incarnate's requests, so she bitterly handed over the sword.**

**Kaede stuck the sword in the pot of iron ore. It melted almost instantaneously. "No more badass blade for Briggs. Armstrong, lose the sparkles for eternity or be forever damned to hell."**

**Armstrong frowned, and started to tear away the sparkles.**

Once gone, Armstrong started to cry, and Olivier got really really pissed.

**"And last but not least," She pulled out many bottles of tequila. She smashed everyone's' heads with the glass bottles and knocked everyone out. Except Doc. For Doc, she pulled out a bottle of champagne and smashed it over her head, knocking her out. "Wine for the classy ones." She said as she walked out the fiery portal to hell that had appeared. "If you'll excuse me, I've some souls to take to hell. This has been Ask and Dare 3. Sayonara, and ganbatte kudasai kouetsu!(hang in there, reviewers)**

As Kaede exited, the lights faded out over everyone's unconscious bodies as "The A-Team Theme" played.

**A/N: I just got home from the pool, and now I am watching Victorious episode where Tori and Jade have to go out on a dare and Robbie and Cat are the bearers of bad news. It is hilarious! RM if you have dares, review if you don't. **

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, Kai**


	7. Canadian Please

**A/N: To all those who are concerned for the well being of everyone's stuff, the studio has a child safety lock (believe it or not) and everything goes back to normal between chapters, unless I say so~**

**Best quote of the week: **

**Doc: What's that?**

**Doc's mom: It's for your brother.**

**Doc: What is it?**

**Doc's mom: A shaving mirror.**

**Doc: He shaves?**

**Doc's mom: No.**

**Doc: Then why- never mind.**

Doc runs in, and avoids the icee cup, but trips on an empty root beer can. She quickly gets up, and smiles to the camera. "Hello, and welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts as "Fight as One" plays.

Sei grins. "The first set of dares is from moi, **seikatsu-chan**."

**Sei sighs. She shakes her head. "Kaedee," she says, "Why did you have to blow up the kindergarten? My ankle biters almost nailed down cold nuclear fusion!"**

Kai nods as six toddlers run and trip Kai. "STUPID ANKLE BITERS!" He shouted, and shook his fist.

**"And thank you for destroying that Icee factory; I've had to find a way to keep Kai supplied since it closed down, and now I don't!"**

"… Ramen?" Kai asked. "And cheesesticks?"

**"Ok." Sei gets a stern look. "So I was wondering, Roy, why have you been cheating on me?" she asks, fire in her eyes.**

"WHAT?! I HAVE NOT BEEN CHEATING!" Roy protested.

"Are you sure?" Lynn asked.

"YES!" Roy replied.

"Riza, Kaede, Ed that one time, and all those girls." Doc counted.

"WAIT, SINCE WHEN WERE WE GOING OUT?!" Roy demanded.

**"Al, how's Kit mach 10 treating you?" Sei smiles and pats the silver and blue robot on the head.**

"Kim is just darling!" Alphonse said. "She's so cute!"

**Sei stands up, reaches into her purse, and pulls out a long sword."Olivier, here's another model of your sword. I have 29 of them, jsyk," she sys.**

"… Jsyk?" Olivier asked while she takes the sword.

"Just so you know." Lynn said.

**"Armstrong, I have some shimmery lotion for you. It's not the sparkles, but it's the best I can do at the moment. It also reduces risk of sunburn." Sei tosses him a tube of lotion that says "Shimmery SPF" on it.**

"THANK YOU!" Armstrong said, and hugged (read almost killed) Sei with tears streaming down his face.

"OUCH!" Sei screamed.

**"Riza, I have an areaonal in the back of you ever need a place for gun storage." Sei gestures to the hallway that just appears.**

Riza nods. "Thank you."

**"Guys, good news! We finally have smell-o-vision!" Sei says, giving a double thumbs-up to the camera.**

"YAY!"

**Suddenly, Sei pinches her nose as a horrib smell floods the room."Aw... What's that smell? Gluttony, really? Camera robot, turn off smell please."**

**The robot nods it's head. "Yes, Sei-sama."**

"Wait, so now the readers will know when I'm having a garlic and onion Icee?"

"Dude, I don't know what you see in those. The next set of dares are from **animelover102**." Doc says.

**sup animelover is bac pep**

**sorry shes on chocolate again lucy said**

**no im not lucy im no tequila lol jk jk**

**-.- well i wouldnt be surprised you are from... *covers lucys mouth* **

**no bad lucy *smackes arm* frist you almost give away my secret and doc is**

**becoming suspisiones about it now you want to ggive away my locating**

**-.- sorry i have a big mouth all of a sudden lucy said**

**dang anyway dare time **

"That is right, I am getting suspicerous~" Doc giggles.

**ed- sup umm sorry about the milk man i dont want to fight with you ok...**

**friends *takes out hand***

Ed looks at animelover's hand warily, then shakes it. "Sure."

**al- aww thanks for taking care of the turtles plz keep doing that ok**

"You got it!"

**roy and envy- once again BEWARE THE VECTORS**

**haha ok now thats getting funny lucy said**

**i know right but wat do the perfer i tell them that or i dare them horrible**

**things**

**if i wear them id think the 2nd choice lucy said**

**ikr anyway a dare for everyone dress up like you fav hero **

Doc grins. "YAY!"

Kai: Iron Man

Doc: Captain America

Edward: Iron Man

Roy: Thor

Riza: Hawkeye

Alphonse: Catwoman

(Kay, that's all I got… I r tired…)

**good one anime *high fives anime**

**anyway ya so doc can we be friends if you say yes just call me anime ok thanks**

**bye :3**

"BYE ANIME!" Doc shouts.

"The next dare-a-ma-doo-hickeys are from **kuttiepie3**." Kai says. "Can I go watch TV now?"

"No. Stay."

**Why hello you little torture devices you~ .**

**Now for my dares**

**Kai- lets see if he can survive and become one with the forest in a week**

**without any supplies**

"TO THE MOSQUITO-INFESTED FOREST!" Doc shouts, and kicks Kai into the forest.

~a week later~

Kai stumbles out of the forest, with a beard and a deranged look. "… HI FLOOR, MAKE ME A SAMMICH! IMMA GONNA ROLL ON THE FLOOR FOR A BIT, KAY?!" He says, and rolls around on the floor.

"… I'm not going to say anything."

**Doc, sei, and Lynn- sing Canadian please while doing a funny dance like the**

**robot or the moon walk, or the shuffle**

Doc nods, and rolls the music. Doc does the robot, Sei does the moon walk, and Lynn does the shuffle, and they all sing "Canadian Please."

The three girls ended with the ending move of standing back to back with crossed arms and nodding heads. "Word!"

**Ed- must watch roy doing really stupid stuff and keep a straight face the**

**whole time**

Roy raised and eyebrow, then shrugged. First, he headed over to the circus that no one ever knew was there, and went to the tightrope. He fell off. Edward managed to keep a straight face, but when Roy went to the cannon, and shot out of it, hit the flaming hoop, and burst into flames, he burst out laughing.

**Tata for now (vanishes in a whole bunch of blinding sparkles that blind**

**someone stupid enough to look at them)**

Kai screamed. "MY EYES!" He rubbed them, and started to wander around, hitting his head on the cannon, and passed out.

Lynn facepalmed. "The next set of dares are from **Talon Graveshadow**."

**Talon yawns, and slowly walks up to the cast.**

**"Hey guys, wassup?" He asks.**

**Then, for some reason, he slaps Envy.**

Envy rubbed his cheek. "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!"

**"T-thats for killing Hughes you dirty rotten ba-ba-bastard," Talon stifles a**

**yawn as he does this, still speaking in a sleepy tone.**

"… Are you doing this at 2 am?"

**"Anyways, dare." Talon straightens up, and takes out a sheet of paper.**

**"Roy, you shall eat forty of the hottest peppers known to mankind, and light a**

**fire in your mouth.**

Roy shrugged, and took the jar of Peruvian Flaming Death Peppers (Garfield, ftw) and ate forty of them. Next, he light a match near his open mouth, and instantly, he turned into a FIRE BREATHING MUSTANG! RUN FOR YOYR PUNY LIVES! AAAAHHH!

**Ed, have some chocolate. **

"… Is it dark chocolate?"

**Yes, of course it's dark chocolate.**

"YAY!" Ed says, and starts to eat his milk-free chocolate.

**Maes, *Hugz* WHY YOU AHVE TO DIE?!" Talon yells.**

"Because if I didn't die, there would've been a huge imbalance. Also, it probably would've ended the series pretty early." Maes shrugs. "It's just a small price to pay."

**Talon straightens up, and smoothes his shirt.**

**"Anywho, I've gotta go, see ya," Talon starts to walk out the door.**

**"Oh wait! Doc, have you played Team Fortress 2? If not, go look it up on**

**Youtube, and look for the Medic. I give you the Medic's medi-gun, for**

**in-chapter usage," Talon explained, holding up said gun.**

Doc quickly goes to her mental youtube, because she has no idea what it is, but then takes it after realizing. "Thank you!" She turned to the fire-breathing Mustang, and fired the gun. The fires instantly extinguished, and Roy's mouth wasn't bleeding anymore. And all was well.

**"Bye!" He yells, and opens the door. Unfortunately, since they were on the**

**moon, he was sucked out at high speeds.**

**"This is why no one uses the doooorrrrrrr," Talon's voice is distantly heard**

"We know. He doesn't." Sei prods Kai's unconscious body with a stick as Doc turns to face the camera.

"Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone says, and the lights fade out as "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: It is official. I know how to spell unconscious! Thank you, spellcheck for also teaching me how to spell psycho! :D Pm if you have dares, review if ya don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	8. Palm Tree Madness

**A/N: Spongebob… Officially… Annoys… Me… **

Doc comes running in and manages not to fall on her face. She turns to the camera with a smile. "Hello! And welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone screams as "Fight as One" plays. Lynn faces the camera. "The first set of dares are from **Dragonlover71491**."

**(Large box is delivered to the studio)**

**"What's in here?" Kai inquires as he opens the lid.**

**(I fly out and somersault in the air a moment before unrolling a banner that**

**says "Viva La Royai!")**

**"I dare anyone to go against me, lest they want to be set on fire."**

Roy shrugs and walks up to DL. But before he could snap his fingers, he is set on fire. "AAAUGH!" He screams, and runs into the ocean.

**Time to get down to business :) Roy, Riza, tell us all honestly, do you two**

**love each other? If neither tell the truth, turn them into an MLP.**

"So either we confess, or get turned into Ponies…" Roy muses as he walks out of the ocean. "I CONFESS! I LOVE RIZA!" He shouts.

Riza glares. "I have no feelings for the Colonel." She says, but gets hit in the neck with a blow dart.

"It is truth serum. What are your feelings for Roy?" Sei asks.

"I… love him…" She says. Roy grins.

"YES! I KNEW IT!" He shouts, and starts to do a victory dance.

**Alphonse, you have to juggle Doc, Kai, and Sei, along with a few torches.**

Alphonse shrugs, and lifts up Doc and Sei on one arm, and Kai on the other arm. "Can you throw me the torches?" He asked Lynn. Lynn nods, and Alphonse starts to juggle the three hosts. Lynn throws a torch to Alphonse, who adds it to the circle of stuff. Edward throws another torch, and Envy throws three. All are added to the circle.

"WHEEE!" Kai shouted. "YAY!" Doc said. "COOL!" Sei cheered.

**Edward, let's see how long you can run away from your fangirls. Give the boy a**

**30 second head start.**

Lynn looked at Edward. "Run. I'll give you thirty seconds. RUN! RUN!" She shouted, and Edward started to run.

~thirty seconds later~

Lynn opened to door to the land of fangirls, and all the Edward fangirls ran out and started to chase Edward.

"EDO-KUUUUUUUN!" "COME BACK EDO!" "I LOVE YOUUUUUU!"

"AAAGH!" Edward shouted, and ran faster.

**Maes, try and keep from gushing about your daughter. If you don't, we change**

**you into a octopus and make you into calamari.**

Maes nods, and throws his pictures of his daughter, and his daughter into Alphonse's large circle of juggled stuff.

**Bye! Love you all!**

"WE LOVE YOU TOO!" Doc shouts from Alphonse's juggle circle.

**(I morph into a chibi dragon and fly away, but not before whacking Envy on the head with my teeny tail.)**

Envy covers his head and scowls. "What the hell was that for?"

**"Me no like you, you cross-dressing, gender confused, palm tree."**

**(Blows raspberry at Envy before flying away.)**

Envy growls. Sei smirks and pushes Kai out of the juggling circle. He falls on his face and grumbles. He looks at the camera. "The next set of dares are from **kuttiepie3**."

**There is a bright flash and suddenly there are fish swimming outside of the window. **

"Wait… WHAT THE HELL!" Sei demands. "WE'RE ON THE MOON! HOW THE HELL CAN THERE BE FISH?"

"Maybe it's a species of flying moon fish!" Kai says. He has obviously hit his head.

**A girl also appears magically behind Kai. "Eh, hi...guy..I might of sort of... kinda teleported the studio at the bottmoftheocean!"**

"WHAT?" Sei says, and looks about ready to strangle the poor girl.

**"PLEASE DON'T BURUTALLY MAUL ME!" **

Sei glares while Doc is staring out the window. "FISHIES!"

**"Well now that we have that sorted out lets do dares~."**

**Doc, sei, and Lynn- WHO WANTS TO BE CANDIAN NOW!**

All three raise their hands.

**ED- Do a very embarrassing dance for blackmail purposes**

Edward is still running away, and is doing really weird evasive maneuvers.

"… Does that count?"

**Doc- be sure to get me lots of pictures**

Doc shrugs, and starts taking pictures of Ed's weird maneuvers.

**Kai- what the wut... I don't really want to know what happened in that**

**forest**

Kai's eyes get huge, and he curls into a fetal position. "The mosquitoes… THE MOSQUITOES!"

**Well asta la vista baby (puts on really epic shade then sky dives and does**

**cool tricks before landing in a candy store)**

"… How can you skydive underwater?"

"Best not to question it… The next set of dares are from **Talon Graveshadow**." Doc says.

**Talon walks in, wielding a bloodstained and battle-worn, but wickedly sharp,**

**claymore sword.**

"What's that sword?"

**"Now, this is a special sword. It's called the Eyelander, pattern-welded**

**Damascus steel, harmonically balanced, slow-forged for generations in the**

**bowels of captured English Kings,"**

"Lol, wut?"

**Drake is interrupted,as a ghastly voice emanates from the sword.**

**"Heeeaads" It mutters.**

Kai looks at the sword, a terrified look on his face.

**"And it's haunted by a malevolent spirit obsessed with beheadings." Talon says all of this while swinging the sword around in his hand.**

"HOLY CRAP IT'S A GHOOOOOOST!" Kai screams, and runs into the forest, then runs out, chased by a swarm of mosquitoes. "NOOOOOO! ANYTHING BUT MOSQUITOES!"

**"And I give it, to... Al!" Talon tosses it in Al's direction.**

Al catches the sword, and looks it over. "Why?"

**"If you ask why, I had it in my shed, and it was taking up space." Talon**

**shrugs.**

"Oh. Okay."

**"Anyways, I dare Winry to attempt to make a robot, the size of three Alex**

**Armstrongs stacked atop each other.**

Winry has an excited glint in her eye, and starts to build.

~an hour later~

"I'm done!" Winry shouts, and shows everyone her invention. It is a three story tall robot that looks like Armstrong.

"Wow…"

**I also dare Kai, to see why no one uses the door."**

Kai shrugs and walks out the door. "HAH!" He shouts, and stands outside the studio.

"How can he breathe underwater?"

"… Best not to question these things…"

**Talon yawns.**

**"That's all, I'm tired." With that, Talon explodes in a burst of fire.**

"Later, dude." Sei says. "The last set of dares are from **Sushi Hawkeye**."

**"I'm back!" Rai called out, shooting a baseball gun at Envy and another at Selim. "Sushi just wanted me to torture some certain humunculi. Since she is still doing homework, she can't come."**

"Aw."

"SO WHY ARE YOU HITTING ME?"

**"Right. The first victim is you, Selim, because the guy sitting beside her reminds her of you. Cute and kind on the outside, a little bastard devil on the inside." Rai said, grabbing a random object from the torture arsenal.**

"… What is that?" Selim asks. "And why is she torturing me just for looking like a bastard she knows?"

**"Ah yes, the most powerful weapon invented by Sei. Now stand still, Pride."**

**Rai raised the weapon and aimed for Selim.**

**"No! Don't hurt my baby!" Mrs Bradley, who had just come back from a tea party with a Mary-Sue, cried out.**

**The homunculi, Ed, and Roy's team tried to stifle their laughter.**

**"Shut up. He's a devil monster." Rai said, all serious and business now.**

While Mrs. Bradley screamed for mercy, Sei chloroformed her, and she was knocked unconscious. Rai shot Pride, who died.

"That rhymes!"

**And Father held a funeral in memory of his homunculi.**

**Kidding. The ghost of Selim Bradley went to the emo corner after his body disintegrated and no one cared.**

**"Much better." Rai grinned. "Dares."**

**"Envy, prove you are not related in any way to a palm tree. If anyone can counter his/her/its proofs, you get a reward from Doc."**

"… What is it?"

"… What do you want?"

"… To kill Hohenheim."

"Done."

"WHAT?"

"You heard him, he's going to kill you."

Envy smirked. "Now, notice that a palm tree has coconuts. I do not."

"Then what are those brown things on your head?"

"My EARS!"

"Oh."

"Also, palm trees create their food from sunlight and water. I eat stuff I make, therefore, I am not a plant. I also hate the sun, and water. So there."

"That proves nothing! You hear me, NOTHING!"

"Then I will pee in a cup to prove that my DNA is not plant-like!" Envy shouts, and runs to the bathroom. He comes out a minute later with green liquid in a tiny cup. "There."

"… That's chlorophyll." Sei noted. "You're definitely part plant…"

"NOOOO!"

**"Ed, you are still in Roy's body, right? Do a mountain of paperwork or be tazered/shot."**

"No." Roy said. "I'm back in my own body."

**"Roy, in Ed's body, obey everything Ed orders you to."**

Edward is still running away.

**"Ed, you still have Envy as a servant, remember that. If you had already let him go, than he is your servant again."**

Envy facepalmed. "I forgot about that…"

**"And this time Envy, you cannot annoy Ed, and must do only what he tells you to. Aside from dares."**

"… Grrr…"

**"Truth, why is your realm all white, aside from the gate? I dare you to make it colorful."**

Truth shrugged, and turned his white realm off-white. "Done."

**"Hm, that's all for now, I gotta check on Sushi to see if she's done. Geez, so this is how Riza feels."**

Riza nods. "Give her my regards."

**"Well, bye." the girl called out, before using a ghost vac on Selim, shaking it, then letting him free. Pride went back to the emo corner.**

"Poor Pride…" Lynn noted. "Eh, he'll get over it."

"Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone says as the lights fade out and "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: Ever been hit in the head by a ball? It's not fun. In other news, I shall be posting a new story that I'm writing with Silvereyedfreak called "Where The Hell Are We." Look for it. And PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	9. Everyone Dies

**A/N: Heheh, I didn't get this up when I wanted to… Heh…**

Doc runs in wearing a clown afro. She stops at the camera. "Hi, everyone! And this is another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone comes in, wearing similar afros. Doc laughs, as everyone does the afro dance. "RA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA CIRCUS, DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA AFRO, CIRCUS, AFRO, CIRCUS, AFRO, POLKA DOT, POLKA DOT, POLKA DOT AFRO!"

"Okay, now that that's out of the way, the first set of dares are from **animelover102**!" Doc says.

***a tv magically appears and behind that tv lucy is standing there***

**hi its lucy anyway anime cant be here so we will do the dares in tv so stay**

**tune to watch *lucy leaves***

"Oh, okay." Kai says, and sits down, his eyes glued to the TV.

***tv turns on* ok anime the tv is on lucy said**

**ok ok thanks anyway frist things first my dares**

**ed- yay were friends again *hugs him***

Edward looks in surprise at the screen. "How is this possible?! You're on TV, but you're hugging me! HOW?!"

**al- keep up the good work heres some food for them *gives them food***

Al takes the food from the screen, which appears in his hand, and smiles. "Thanks!"

**roy and envy- i want you too to fight and who ever wins will no longer get**

**torture ok**

Roy and Envy high five, then realize what they're doing, and step away awkwardly.

**doc- yay were friends **

"Hooray for friendship!" Doc says.

**anyway last dare everyone dance like silly people lol**

Lynn turns on the Crazy Hamster Dance, and everyone starts to dance like crazy.

**ok thats all for now bye *leaves the room***

**wait doc stay you want to know her secret right now stay ok **

Doc smirked. "I already kno-ow~"

***anime walks in the room* is it off**

**ya its turned off anyway anime i have a question lucy said**

**ok wats the question**

**umm can you explain your feelings for you know who lucy said**

**why are you asking me this again**

**idk i keep forgeting lucy said**

**umm ok but you have a reason why**

**i already told you i keep forgetting lucy said**

**ok you mean my anime crush**

**yup you know ed lucy said**

**oh ya im in love with ed becacuse hes so cool and awsome and much hotter then roy **

**ok thats all i need to know *starts cracking up**

**umm you ok lucy *sees the tv on* OMFG LUCY YOU BETTER RUN FOR YOUR LIFE *turns off tv***

As Anime runs away, Doc fist pumps. "I KNEW IT!" And Ed is staring open mouthed at the screen with Roy.

"Awkward…" Sei muttered. "The next set of dares is from me, **seikatsu-chan**."

**Sei is running around the studio with a suitcase screaming about how they're**

**all gonna die unless they get back up to the moon. She runs down the stairs.**

Roy stares at the stairs. "Um, is she okay?" He asked cautiously.

"She's fine, but she's pissed that the base isn't on the moon. The moon base feeds off of star power, so if the studio ever leaves the moon, or space, we have at least… five? Yeah, five episodes to live." Doc nods.

"How long has it been?"

"I think this is the fifth."

"… AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Everyone screams and freaks out.

**Sei comes back up in her overalls and white t-shirt covered I swear, motor**

**oil, and something that looks suspiciously like blood.**

"… I don't wanna know."

**"Okay,"she says, "I fixed the teleporter. I almost forgot I moved my toolkit**

**to something much more efficient as well." She holds up a tiny, blue box.**

"… What?"

"Time Lord technology."

"… Again, what?"

"It's spacey-wacey. Now shut up."

**"Everyone hold on tight!"**

**The ground shakes and the world spins around for about five minutes. Suddenly, it stops. **

**Doc looks out the window and pulls Sei over. "Oh my..." Sei says.**

**"We're on the...we're on Mars!"**

**Sei smiles. Oops, wrong coordinates... Stupid UPS..."**

"WHAT DOES THAT SHIPPING COMPANY HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?!"

**"And by UPS I mean Universal Positioning System."**

"Oh."

**"Should we stay here, or go back?"**

"I WANNA STAY!" Kai shouts.

**"Ok... I guess we can stay, I'll just make the radar stronger."**

"That'll work."

**"So," Sei smiles deviously, "I only have one dare today. We're all going to**

**summer camp in the woods room!"**

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Kai shouts, and runs from the room. "THE MOSQUITOOOOOOOOES!"

"… This'll be fun…"

~one summer camp trip later~

"That… Was AWFUL."

"It wasn't that bad."

"Never again. you hear me? NEVER!" Kai shouts, and runs out of the room, screaming 'VIVE LA RESISTANCE!'

"… Okay then. The next review is from **RubySaphireMoon**." Lynn says, sweatdropping.

***crashes through the window on a surf board* Duuuude...that. was. AWESOME! I fricken love shark chases... Anyway, at least the plastic surgery went ok. Man, kudos to Mei, alkahstry takes awhile to learn... Alright then... **

"… Alright then…"

**Roy- Now that you and Riza confessed, can I marry your son? NO, I will not give up, so quit being a jerk! Regardless, I am currently staring at some lovely Mountains I do not know that name of. It's quite fascinating! **

"NO! YOU CANNOT MARRY MY SON! THAT IS FOR JEAN AND LYNN'S CHILD TO DO!" Roy shouts.

"Wait, Lynn's pregnant?"

"No…" Lynn says. "We haven't even done it yet!"

"BUT IT WILL HAPPEN!" Roy shouts.

**Truth- You said you don't like colors. Black isn't technically a color, right? Black and white are reflections I think, so why white instead of black?**

"Because white gives my victims hope." Truth smiles evilly.

**Alphonse~ You're still so cute! *bear hugs* I now Envy Edward. If I had you as a little brother...I'm not sure I could stop hugging you..*sigh* But at least I have pictures~! *holds up Al's photo-album of epic cuteness* hehehe~!**

"Thank you! I'm glad to know that I'm loved!" Al smiles cutely.

**Kai- I brought your pink Kunai back... Sorry if they kinda turned orange. The blood always taints stuff! **

"Um, Kai's not here… He ran away to watch Avatar: the Last Airbender." Doc says. "He loves it."

**Envy- I feel a VERY strong urge to smack you. *whips out a large steel hammer and crushes Envy* heheh~! That felt SO good! You know what? I'm in a giving mood. Sooo~! Edward, Roy, and one other person can join in the Envy bashing. The more critical blows count for more points. Whoever wins gets a free bashing ticket. Good for 1 use to bash whomever they please! **

Envy growls in pain, and everyone gets evil glints in their eyes.

"… Crap."

~Doc has chosen not to show this scene due to violent Envy bashes~

**And now, I must resume my hunting of sharks...hehe! Those stupid fish never see it coming. Who's the predator now! *laughs maniacally before picking up the surfboard and hopping out the window* See ya later dudes~!**

"BYE!" Everyone shouts.

"The last review for today is from **Mage of Hope**." Doc says.

***Someone in a black cloak appears and destroys all the doors with super sonic spped* Hey! Sorry I couldn't review before, I had stupid exams to study for, but I'm free now!**

"YAY!"

**Envy: Maybe I have some dares or truths for you but this time, I'm going to tell you how I feel about you. *Takes deep breath* YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A INDECENT, INCONSIDERATE, LOUSY, PSYCHOTIC, EGOTISTIC, IDIOTIC, PERVERTED, MORONIC, IMMATURE, SCUM OF THE EARTH, INHUMAN, ANIMALISTIC,BUT MOST OF ALL, YOU'RE A RAPTIST! **

"I'm sorry, but Envy is in our hospital now. I can give him the message later."

**Doc: So how was my speech to Envy? Pretty awesome huh? I bet anyone wanted to do that! Also, what's with the new picture designer thing that was posted in our profiles? You know, the Images Manager thing? I'm sorry, can you explain?**

"It's so beautiful!" Doc sobs. "And the Image Manager is simple as pie. You simply save a picture from the internet to a file, exactly like how you would post your profile picture. Except you go to image manager instead. You also have to have to click the button that says you have permission to use the photo. Then once you've uploaded that, go to Manage stories, and click the story you want to add the cover to. All done!" Doc smiles.

**Al: I dare you to kiss and hug all the most vicious creatures in the world! I have nothing against you, but I just want to see.**

Al nods reluctantly nods, and puts on his armor. He walks into the room marked 'Dangerous Animals,' and closes the door.

Half an hour later, he comes out with his armor torn to shreds, and numerous cuts all over his body. He stumbles out the door, and collapses.

"You can buy the DVD in the kitchen." Sei says.

**Ed: Dye your hair rainbow colored and the cut it short. I really never did like your hair long.**

Before Edward can protest, Doc, Sei, and Lynn grab his head and chop his long hair off an pour rainbow hair dye all over him.

A bit later, Edward's hair and clothes are dyed rainbow. :)

**Roy: Dare you to go bald and run around in public naked.**

Roy shrugs, and puts on a bald cap, along with stripping all his clothes off.

"DUDE! I DON'T NEED TO SEE THAT!"

"TOUGH PATOOTIES!"

**Doc: See to it that Roy gets arrested.**

"911? There's a naked man inside my home on mars!" Doc shouts.

"We'll be right there!" The operator said.

An hour later, Roy was back in the studio with a towel covering his vital regions with two police guards hand-cuffed to him.

"SCORE!"

**Kai: Icee contest against all the FMAB members!**

"He's watching his soaps."

"Icee?" Kai asks, poking his head into the room. "I can do that."

Quite a while later, everyone else has a brain freeze except for Kai, who sits with two dozen empty Icee cups around him.

"I. Win."

**Doc: Everyone but you, Kai, and Sei will not be affected with this next new power I obtained, but your studio will automatically be restored in the next chapter. Sorry if I destroy your studio, but every single FMAB member deserves this attack! Also, you, Kai, and Sei will be safe in this force field as long as you don't get out. * Summons meteors, fireballs, missils, tidal waves, explosions, bombs, tornadoes, earthquakes, lighting, and ICEEs to the area.**

"… What about Lynn?" Doc asked, looking around. Everyone was dead, including Lynn.

"… Oh well." Kai shrugged.

**Well, that's all! Sayonara**

"Bye!" Sei says.

"Well, this has been another episode of… ASK! AND! DARE! 3!" Doc shouts as the lights dim out and the "A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait… I was kinda really distracted… REVIEW!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	10. Truth's Domain

**A/N: I'll try to get this out sooner! Also, if this gets deleted, I won't re-start it again. Sorry, guys. Start time: 9/6/12**

The lights flare on as Doc comes jumping in. "HELLO PRETTY PONIES! Welcome back to the tenth episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts and runs out as "Fight as One" plays.

"We're gonna go quickly, so the first set of dares are from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**." Lynn says.

***rumbling noises and girls screaming***

***pounding at the door***

**Aka- AHHH OPEN THE DOOR! OPEN THE DAMN DOOR NOOOOOW!**

**Emi, Angel, and Yuki-HURRY!**

***door opens and the girls run in and lean against the door***

**Emi-Uh, uh... Edward, use your alchemy and seal the door shut!**

**Angel-All of your guy's crazed fan girls are back!**

***girls screaming for Edward, Alphonse, Mustang, and surprisingly Envy***

**Yuki- Baka fan girls followed us here.**

Ed, Al, Roy, and Envy's eyes widen, and they help bar the door.

"Phew…"

**Emi-Ok then. Ed *hands Ed a jar with a gecko/lizard in it* since the dog attacked you last time, i found by far the harmless pet i could find. You need to take care of it for two chapters.**

Ed took the jar, and opened it. As soon as he did, the lizards jumped out and attacked him. "AAAAGH!" He cried, then shuts the jar. "Harmless my ass."

**Angel-*poofs into a fox and jumps on top of Ed's head and takes a nap***

"WHAT THE?!" Ed shouted.

**Yuki- She's part chimera. Oh an to why there was snowballs the last time we were here, I am the snow alchemist in Aka's story's.**

"… Sure."

**Aka-Roy, i will allow you to dress up Emily how ever you want to and Emi, you**

**have to let him.**

**Emi-Aw.**

***everyone is waiting for them***

***a few minutes later, they come out***

**Yuki-Oh, and Riza if it's too unnecessary, you can tazer Roy.**

When Roy comes out with Emily, she's dressed as a My Little Pony. Rainbow Dash, to be exact.

**Aka-ENVY! You're lucky, we've decided to not do anything to you, this time. Oh**

**and Ed! You need to watch Fox Angel till the next time we come!**

**Fox Angel-*still on top of Ed's head wagging her tail***

"So I'm stuck with a killer lizard and a fox demon for two days?!" Ed shouts.

"Fox Angel, not Fox Demon." Sei notes.

"WHATEVER!"

**Aka, Emi, and Yuki- Bye! **

***Aka opens a portal of some sort and they use it to get out***

"The next set of dares are from **Dragonlover71491**." Sei says.

**Hey Doc, Kai, I got something for you two. (Presents two wrapped packages)**

**Open em' up, you'll love it!**

**(Doc and Kai lift up the lids before being tackled to the floor by two tiny**

**dragons; one black European, the other a blue Eastern.)**

"SPARKY!" Doc shouted.

"TOOTHLESS!" Kai shouted.

**That's right, I got you Sparky and Toothless! They missed you, and they have**

**all the same powers as before, plus they can grow bigger when you want to ride them!**

"HOORAY!"

**Now to the show! Everybody has to get in a conga line and do the limbo, hosts**

**included!**

"Well in that case, LIMBO TIME!" Kai shouts, and the studio transforms into a beach party complete with limbo bars.

"LIMBO LIMBO LIMBO! CONGA LINE!" Lynn shouts, and everyone does the Limbo, then joins a conga line. "YEAH!"

**Next, let's turn Ed into an MLP and put Elicia and Nina on his back, and he**

**has to give them a ride.**

Sei grins evilly, and uses her magic to turn Ed into a red pony with a flamel cutie mark. "WHAT THE?!"

"YAY!" Nina and Elicia shouted with glee, and jumped onto Ed's back. Ed neighed in shock and started to canter away.

"MY DAUGHTER!" Maes shouted, chasing after Ed.

**Then, let's shave off all of Lust's hair and doodle a funny face on the clear**

**surface.**

Kai pulled out a dart gun and sedated Lust. As soon as she collapsed, Doc pulled out a razor and shaved her hair off. Sei then took the liberty of doodling a weird face on the shiny bit.

When Lust woke up, everyone was gone, and her hair was gone, and there was a weird face on the back. "AAAAAAAGH!" She screamed.

**And finally, all of the Armstrongs have to dog pile on Roy!**

Much to Roy's dismay, two large men, three large women, and two other women jumped onto Roy. He was still in the hospital for two weeks after that, along with Edward, who was still suffering from lizard bites and saddle burn.

**P.S. If you need any magic potions or whatev, I'm your dragongirl! Bye, kisses**

**to all of the protagonists, and a swift kick to the rears of all the villains!**

"Okay!" Everyone shouted, waving goodbye.

"The next set of dares are from **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**." Doc says.

**Kaede slammed open the studio doors and walked in. In a mad and monotone voice she said. "Hi. I hate cats"**

**WHY DO YOU HATE CATS?!" Alphonse cried out, making himself look like an idiot in front of the whole studio. Everyone laughed, and sent Alphonse to the emo corner with a little cat plushy in his arms.**

**"They destroyed my Internet access for a week! So in revenge..." Kaede stole all of Al's cats. Living and stuffed. She put them in a boiling cauldron and made a delicious cat stew, and then gave it to Edward, who was quite pleased with how well it came out.**

**"This is amazing! But why does it have an alcoholic taste?"**

**Kaede got a devilish look on her face. "THE TEQUILA HAS RETURNED! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!" The she turned to everyone else. "I put in everyone's water, which it appears that everyone has taken a sip of. Including myself. So, my dare for everyone is LET THE LOVE BEGIN!**

Everyone's eyes started twitching, and they started going crazy. Mostly just Doc and Kai. And yeah, everyone else.

***after all the love is happened***

**"Okay, I can tell you want to kill me, so do what Italy does! No war, just pasta. AAAAHHHHHH!" And ran out the door.**

"… Well, we're all sober now, so the last set of dares are from **Sushi Hawkeye.**" Kais says.

**"Hey guys! Guess who got only two easy homeworks today?" Sushi grinned, pulling Rai beside her.**

**"Yup. Didn't need to babysit last time after all. Unlike a certain useless when wet (like the paper in paperwork that he hates) colonel alchemist." Rai grinned while looking at said person's direction.**

**"And another act of revenge. My Selim/Pride classmate got me to cuss real bad again. I was actually mumbling random cuss words. And two of my classmates actually supported me," Sushi declared, giving Pride an evil look only second to Ed's.**

**"Tsk. I thought you were gonna break that habit of yours?" Rai glared at Sushi.**

**"Well I can't help it if that kid is like the Earth counterpart of Selim/Pride. And I have to sit beside him and endure the taunting and torturing..." Sushi shivered. "Anyway, enough rambling. My revenge is for Pride to become the homunculi's little servant. Except Envy."**

Pride snarled at Sushi, but obeyed.

"WHY NOT ME?!" Envy shouted.

"Nobody likes you." Gluttony replied.

"GRRRRR!"

**"You like making your enemies do stuff for you or others don't you." Rai said.**

**"Yep."**

**"I have a question. If the studio is on the moon, then if you open a door or window, won't stuff and people get sucked out due to difference in atmospheric pressure?" Rai eyed Kai and the door**

"Actually, we're on Mars." Kai replied.

"And besides, I modified it so that we don't get sucked out." Sei added.

**"Why don't we test that theory. Since Kai keeps spazzing that people don't use the door, why not let him be the one to test?" Sushi declared, rubbing her hands together and an evil glint in her eyes.**

**"Nah, let's use Tucker. Poor Nina..." Rai started tearing up.**

**"Alright. I'm fine with that."**

Kai opened the door, and Tucker was sucked out of the room into empty space.

**"I just remembered something. Your dare for Truth last time?" Rai recalled, after noticing a shadow outline of someone.**

**"Hey, Truth used loophole! I guess I'll have to be more specific. Truth, I dare you to make your realm very colorful, with as many colors known to man."**

Truth blew a raspberry.

**"And for precautionary measure, Armstrong! **

"Which one?" They all asked.

**Err...the sparkly one. I dare you to help Truth in decorating his realm. And the gate. Feel free to add sparkles and to paint rainbows and flowers and butterflies and fire and snakes and stuff." Rai suggested, gesturing to the off-white place.**

Armstrong nodded and ripped his shirt off. "BUT OF COURSE!" He shouted, and grabbed a gigantic brush, and started painting My Little Ponies all over Truth's realm.

**"Nice one, neko. Okay, next. Everyone, onto Facebook! Specially Maes." Sushi pointed into an open portal that led to a place filled with enough computers for all. "Hey Hughes~~did you know you could post pictures and tag people to let them know about it?" she whispered into his ear.**

Maes grinned widely, and grabbed his camera.

**"Guys, there are games as well!" someone called out.**

**"Okay, who was that?" Rai raised an eyebrow.**

"ME!" Kai shouted, and started to play Bejeweled Blitz.

**"Oh. Alright."**

**"Hm, all I can think of for now, bye!" Sushi waved, along with Rai.**

**Then Sushi turned into plates of everyone's choice of sushi and Rai turned into a cat stuffed toy. And a pink badass sword with a note attached to it fell onto Olivier's head.**

**Note:**

**You can keep the sword, I got Lan Fan's and Riza's weapons. Except for the tazer.**

Olivier smiled evilly, and waved good-bye as everyone started randomly telling everyone how his or her day was.

Doc started typing, and on everyone's Facebook page was: Well, this has been another episode of…

And everyone else replied (and liked): ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!

Sei turned off the lights via internet, and Kai played "The A-Team Theme" off iTunes.

**A/N: End time: 9/7/12 Wow that was fast! So yeah, I guess I have to remove the song lyrics from this fic. Oh well. **

**To Lissie Lupin: If you're reading this, which you probably won't, (you'll probably report me. AGAIN.) STOP TELLING ME TO DO STUFF THAT I WONT DO BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE I DON'T LIKE TELLING THINGS THAT I DON'T WANNA DO. I prefer to hear that from my friends. I actually listen to them. Other than that, I'm a stubborn idiot. **

**Devil'sEyeAlchemist13: Thanks for letting me know that I have to do that. Thanks! :)**

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	11. Jack Attack!

A/N: Alright! Start time: 9/7/12, 10:48 Let's get going!

* * *

Doc cartwheels out and performs a split. "We're going to try to hurry through this, so let's go! Welcome to another episode of..."  
"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!"Everyone shouts and enters as "Fight as One" plays.  
"The first set of dares are from Mage of Hope." Doc says.

Hey! You were late!

"Yeah, yeah." Doc mumbles. "I was busy."

Roy: I triple dog dare ya to shave your head and NOT wear a bald cap!

Roy screams in frustration and shaves all his hair off.

Doc: Please see it that Roy actually does the dare!

"Um, I don't think he needs help..." Doc says. As soon as she says it, Roy's hair grows back.  
"Heheh, special potion from Dragonlover." He smirks.  
"Well then..."

Envy: Did you get my message? If you did, then all of that was indeed true!

"I got your damn message, lady, and I get that crap everyday." Envy huffs.  
That's all I have right now! Bye!  
"Later!" Sei says. "The next set of dares are from XAka-kitsune-toriX."

*Aka is thrown through the door*

Aka- WTF. why the hell did you do that for Sin?!  
*A girl with long brown hair and red eyes, wearing some thing similar to Envycomes in.*  
Sin- I had nothing else to do.  
Emi- not to mention that you didn't want to come here.  
Aka- you could have come here with out me though.  
Sin- Who gives a hell about what you want and don't want!  
*Aka sits in a corner moping*  
Yuki- What did i miss- *sees Aka in a corner* on second thought, i dont wannaknow.  
Sin- Well first of all, i'm Sin, the 8 th homunculus in Aka's story.

"Well that explains it."

Emi- Ed, dress up like a girl and stay like that till the end of the nextchapter. Sorry, it was Sin's idea.

Ed glares at Sin, who smiles innocently. Grumbling, he walks into the changing room, and comes back out in a skirt and camisole.

"I hate you all..."

Yuki- Mustang, same as Ed!

Roy stops laughing at Ed, and Ed shoves him into the changing room, and comes out a bit later in a mini skirt and tube top.  
Ed broke down laughing.

Sin- Ok, everyone needs to answer this. Out of me, Angel, Emi, Yuki and Aka,who do you like best?

"Um, does everyone have to answer?"

*Angel suddenly changes into her fox form*

Fox Angel- All need to Answer!

After careful consideration, the homunculi answer Sin, the hosts answer Aka, and everyone but Ed votes for Angel. He voted for Emi.

Sin- Finally, Ed needs to watch over fox Angel till we say so.

"I THOUGHT I ALREADY WAS!" He shouted.

Emi- Well, that's all.  
Yuki- Bye!  
Yuki- *Walk out*  
Emi- *fixes the door and follows Yuki*  
*Sin grabs Aka by the back of her shirt and drags her away*

"Bye!" Lynn says. "The next set of dares are from Talon Graveshadow."

Talon walks in, wearing a blue suit.

"What's with the suit? Schnazzy, but not really necessary." Doc says.

"Oh, sorry. I was just taking care of some business," Talon the background, a distant scream echoes."HELP! THE PAAAIIINNNN!" Talon turns around and fires what lookssuspiciously like a laser screwdriver at the voice.

"... IS THAT A LASER SCREWDRIVER?!" Kai shouts. "OMIGOD THE MASTER'S BACK RUN FOR DA HIIIIIIIIIILLS!" He immediately starts running for the large hills,but stops when he falls off of one.

"Um... I've been taking tips from Artemis Fowl... yeah...anyways, DARES!"Talon yells, whipping out a piece of paper."Envy, would you kindly go explode yourself with this," Talon gives Envy apiece of nuclear dynamite."Go to Pluto, if you have to." Talon advises.

Envy scoffs, and walks into a bomb-proof room. Seconds later, a large explosion shook the studio, and Envy walked out of the room, burnt like toast.

"Okay, Ed, you are now going to attempt to eat your own automail. With Milk.

Ed growls, but covers his automail in milk, and tries to eat it, but only breaks hit teeth.

"Father, kindly change your name to Mother."

Father (sorry, Mother,) raises an eyebrow, but obliges.

Talon pulls out a different piece of paper."And now, a few . Hughes, what's you apple pie secret?

"You really wanna know the secret? Well, I always add extra cinnamon, and a hint of apple juice to the mix. Plus lots of love." She smiles.

Al, why doesn't Ed like milk?

"He's lactose-intolerant." Al says simply.

And finally, Roy, what do you think of this man?" Talon pulls Captain JackHarkness from Doctor Who (The immortal one) into the room.

"Hi, Captain Jack Harkness." Jack says.  
"Roy Mustang." Roy says.  
"Oh stop flirting." Sei rolls her eyes.  
"But we're just saying hello!" They both say.  
"For you two that's flirting." Lynn says.  
"I like him." Roy declares.  
"Well, bye!" Talon leaves the room in an explosion of Time Energy.

"Later, alligator!" Kai says, coming back. "The last set of dares are from Dragonlover71491."

(Chibi black dragon poofs out of nowhere, landing on Doc's head.)

"Oh, hello DL!" Doc says, taking the dragon off her head, and placing her on Sparky's back.

"It's wonderful to be back. I decided to go with a smaller form to notfrighten the cast." I chirp as I make cute chibi-eyes.

"D'AW!" Everyone coos.

Now, time to get to work. First, a small gift for Doc, Kai and the rest of thehosts. (Offers little bottles of potion.) Drink this stuff in order to becomewhat you truly are on the inside.

"Okay!" Kai says, and takes his bottle. After he chugs it, he quivers, and smirks before leaving the room. He runs into the music room, and some really complicated drum rhythms are heard.  
"... Well then." Doc says, and takes her bottle. Sei and Lynn also take theirs, and the three drink. When they're done, Doc runs into the music room, and she starts to sing. Sei runs to the lab, and comes out minutes later, proclaiming that she discovered the cure for cancer. Lynn skips to the music room, and many other instruments are heard.  
"... Well then."

And now, to the dares! Roy, you need to model a tiny miniskirt for the public!Enjoy!

Captain Jack smiles foxily, and Roy goes to change back into his miniskirt. When he comes out, Jack does a wolf whistle.

Next, let's turn Al into a maraca and shake him til he's dizzy.

Sei comes out, snaps her fingers, and Al turns into a metal maraca, which Mei grabs, and starts shaking.  
A bit later, Sei snaps her fingers again, and Al turns back human, and vomits. "... Clean up on aisle three!"

Then, just because I'm in a hyper mood, Riza has to run around town in herundies! I know she's going to shoot me, but screw the consequences!

Riza's glare is murderous, but she takes off her uniform, and runs around, followed by wolf whistles from Roy and Jack.

And finally, let's see how well Roy does in taming a wild lion. If he canmanage to make it jump through a flaming hoop, I'll name him the awesomestalchemist in the history of forever!

Roy changes into a lion tamer outfit, and uses his whip on a random lion that Kai kept as a pet.  
An hour later, Roy managed to make it River dance, sing opera, and juggle on a unicycle. And make it jump through a flaming hoop.

"Bye!" (Poofs out of sight.)

"Bye!" Doc says. "This had been another episode of..."  
"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone says, and the lights fade out as "the A-Team Theme" plays.

* * *

A/N: End time: 9/7/12, 11:18  
DONE! PM if you have dares, review if ya don't. Sorry about the type... Not a good idea to update from an iPad...  
~Doc


	12. Only Three

**A/N: I've been getting the dates wrong… Start time: 8/8/12, 4:57 (oh yeah, I have to write a chapter tomorrow for Kai's birthday, SO GIVE ME DARES!)**

Doc cart wheeled into the room, and performed a flip before crashing on her face. She jumps up, and grins like nothing happened. "Wow, I seem to do this a lot… Well, welcome to another fun-filled episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, and runs in. Sei grins at the camera.

"Hola! The first set of dares are from everyone's favorite devil, **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**." She says.

**A quiet mumble is heard behind the studio doors...**

"Who's that?" Alphonse asks, and Ed hits him and calls him an idiot.

**"Come on! It'll be fun!" A girl said.**

**"Wha'? Why? I don' even know anyone here!" A man complained.**

**"Just stay silent and let me do the talking." Kaede walked in the door, the man quietly trailing behind. "Hey Doc! I think you've met Gin before."**

**"Hi," Gin said quietly. He had silver hair and was smiling a very wide smile, eyes closed to slits (like Ling's).**

"Hey, Gin!" Doc waves. "I remember! Kaede was going on and on-" Doc says, but was smacked by Sei, who shook her head.

**"He's from Bleach, fyi. For those of you who don't know Gin, his full name is Gin Ichimaru, ex-Captain of Squad 3. Yeah, he's a bad guy. Anyway,"**

Ed glared at Gin, as did Roy. "Peh."

**"I'm here ta help wi' a few of yer dares...wai'. wha' were th' dares again, Kaede?" Gin stopped smiling as he turned to Kaede.**

"Heheh, awkward~" Kai sang.

**"I knew you'd forget the dare. Anyway, this is an everyone dare. Everyone is going to pull three pranks on someone else in the studio. People can share pranks, and the same prank can be done twice, but not by the same person, and you can't prank the same person twice."**

"… Huh?" Everyone asked.

**"I know it sounds a li'l confusin'" Gin interrupted Kaede. "Bu' basically Doc can' prank Roy twice. Doc can prank Roy an' the' Sei can prank Roy, though."**

**"Whatdya know, you actually remembered their names. One in a row. Gin and I'll judge and reveal the winner next chapter."**

**"Th' winner will get ta kill as many people as he/she/it wan's ta. Good luck; yer gonna need it."**

**"Let the pranking..." Kaede dropped a flag. "BEGIN!"**

During a long afternoon of pranking, a few people were dead, some had pie all over them, Doc's glasses were broken, Kai's drums were full of pudding, Sei's lab exploded, and Lynn had mysteriously vanished with Jean.

**"Nice job, guys!" Kaede congradulated as they walked out the door. "And don't worry, Roy; I ain't cheating on you."**

**"A' least, no' wi' 'im." Gin la**

"… Gin la? What does that mean?" Kai asked.

"I think it means 'Gin lied.'" Doc explained. Roy snarled, and ran after Gin, screaming something about 'getting away from his woman.'

"Should we move on?" Kai asked.

"Good idea. The next review is from **Talon Graveshadow**." Doc says.

**Talon pokes his head in through the door. "By the way, Jack gets to stay**

**around for as long as he wants.. Or," Talon smirks "Until one of the homunculi**

**can kill him" Talon closes the door and goes back to 'business'.**

"Oh, okay." Jack smiled, and smirked at the homunculi, complete with his tongue sticking out. "You do know I'm immortal, right? I can't die, period. Even when I'm killed many many times!" He bragged.

"… Lets move on before this gets ugly." Doc says.

"The next review is from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**." Lynn says.

"And where were you earlier?!" Sei asks.

"Um… Nowhere?" Lynn smiles weakly.

"Suuuuuuure."

***The girls walk in with a boy that looks like Angel, but with shorter hair***

"Who're you?" Ed asks.

**Angel- Zen? What are you doing here, and were is Aka?**

**Zen- Aka isn't here today because of what Sin did to her last time. So i will be taking her place. My name is Zen, Angel's younger twin brother in Aka's story. So to start things off, Aka wants the girls here to fight the boys:**

**Ed vs. Sin**

**Sin- Why do I get the pipsqueak? **

(I'm too lazy to write the battles out, so I'll just write the winner.)

Sin.

**Mustang vs. Emi**

**Emi- YES! Bring it on Miniskirt man!**

Roy.

**Al vs. Yuki**

**Yuki- YES! Wait, what?**

Al.

**Envy vs. Angel**

**Angel- ALRIGHT! I get to beat up the cross dressing palm tree!**

***After the fight***

Envy.

**Zen- Aka has a question for Ed. She wants to know why animals hate you so much.**

"Animals hate because THEY ARE FREAKING IDIOTS!" Ed shouts, and all the animals in the room turn and growl at him.

**Emi- Al, do you like any other animals besides cats and bunnies? **

"I love all kinds of animals!" Al says. "Like ponies and puppies and squirrels and gerbils and mice and hamsters and turtles and tortoises and fish and wolves and foxes and, and and-"

"That's enough, Al." Ed interrupts, placing a hand over Al's mouth.

**Angel- Winry, why did you become an automail mechanic and not a doctor? **

"Because that's how I was able to help Ed, and everyone else after the civil war." Winry explains.

**Yuki- Envy…**

**Sin- *glares at her***

**Yuki- never mind…**

**Sin- *smirks* Oh and Pipsqueak still needs to watch over Angel.**

**Angel- *changes into her fox form and jumps on Ed's head again***

**Fox Angel- YAY!**

**Zen- …**

"WHY ME?!" Ed shouts, trying to take Fox Angel off his head.

**Emi- Riza, tazer Mustang.**

Riza glares are Roy, and tazes him. She grins evilly as he falls to the floor.

**Yuki- well, that's it. *leaves***

**Emi- Bye! *drags Zen away who was still staring at Ed and Fox Angel***

**Sin- *follows***

"The last review is from… Actually, there's no more dares." Kai says, frowning.

"Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone says, and the lights fade out as "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: Ending time: 8/8/12, 6:34. GIMME MORE DARES SO I CAN GIVE KAI THE BEST BIRTHDAY CHAPTER EEEEEEVAAAAAAHHHHH!**

**Kai: I DEMANDS GIFTS!**

**Shut up. PM if you have dares, review if ya don't. :)**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	13. Happy Birthday Kai!

**A/N: Late birthday chapter for Kai. MUST FINISH! Start: 8/9/12, 11:25 pm**

Kai runs in, wearing a red and blue party. He smiles widely at the camera. "Hey! Since its my birthday, I get to do the opening this time! So hello and welcome to another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, and runs in, all wearing party hats, and "Fight as One" plays.

"The first set of dares are from everyone's favorite devil/crazy lady, **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**!" Kai shouts.

**Kaede came storming in the door, dragging a beat-up Gin behind her. "GOD DAMMIT ROY! It was LAUGHED, not LIED! You can't assume everything!"**

"... Oh." Roy looked at the ground sheepishly.

**"Tha' wasn' very nice, now was tha', Roy?" Gin asked as he got on his feet, slightly bent over from Roy going berserk on him. "I think ya owe me a' apology."**

"Um, sorry?"

**"Thank ya!" he replied.**

**"Yeah, I wouldn't cheat on you with him, Roy. Don't be stupid!" Kaede walked out the door.**

"BUT WHERE'S SHE GOING?!" Ed shouted frantically. "DO WE HAVE NO DARES FROM HER TODAY?!"

**"Don' worry, she's jus' gonna get someone." Gin said, calming Ed down from his excitement of no dares...so far.**

"... Aw, pony feathers." Ed grumbled.

**"THIS," Kaede came back dragging another man by the ear. "Is who I would. He's the number one on my list. His name is Sosuke Aizen."**

Roy glared murderously at Aizen, while Doc clapped her hands. "I remember you too! She goes on an on abou-" Sei cut Doc off by clamping her hand to Doc's mouth.

**"Why am I here?" Aizen asked, freeing himself from Kaede's iron grip. "I'm not doing anything." At least that was what he was told.**

"SHE LIED."

**"I change my mind. Aizen, grab Truth and Father and argue as to why you'd be better as God."**

**"But I am God!" Aizen remarked.**

**"Not according to them! Take care, have a nice day!" Kaede shoved the three into a room and the bickering began.**

"Who's betting on Aizen coming out alive?" Kai called. Nobody's hand went up. "Wanna bet on it?" He grinned wolfishly. Everyone nodded smugly, and the gambling began...

**"Now, ta wha'we came fer," Gin said.**

**"WAIT! I NEED TO GIVE ROY AN EXPLAINATION!" she interrupted as she pulled out a whiteboard with kanji written all over it. **

"SHE NEEDS TO GIVE ME AN EXPLANATION!" Roy called from the gambling table.

**" You aren't first anymore since I've seen Bleach. And my fangirl crazes changed the order too. So here is the new 1-5 order!" She pointed down the list as she said the names. "1. Sosuke Aizen, Bleach. 2. Grimmjow Jaegarjaquez, Bleach. 3. Gin Ichimaru, Bleach." **

**Gin waved to everyone aas Kaede said his name.**

**"4. Yuu Kanda, D. Gray-Man. 5. Roy Mustang, Fullmetal Alchemist/Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood."**

**"Ya done yet, Kaede?" Ichimaru yawned while reading a magazine in the corner.**

**"Yes, Gin, I'm finished." She pushed the whiteboard away, which happened to crash into Roy. "That's payback!"**

Roy ran away from the gambling table crying Falman tears. "YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYMORE!" He shouted, running to the screening room to watch James Bond movies over ice cream.

**"An'way," Gin dropped the magazine and walked over to Kai. "We hear' t'day's yer birthday. We gotya a li'l something!"**

"OOH! WHAT IS IT?!" Kai shouted excitedly, jumping up and down.

"Whoa, there, boy" Doc said, placing a hand on Kai's head.

**Kaede pulled out a massive chocolate cake, with big red icing letters that said "Happy Birthday Kai" in Japanese, of course.**

"Choooooooocoooooolaaaaaaaaat eeeeeeeeee..." Kai drooled, making grabby hands to the cake. "Mine! Mine! I want some! Mine!"

"Not yet! There's more!"

"Really? YAY!"

**Out of the top of the cake popped Lust, who had an envelope in her hand. "Happy, Birthday, Kai! Here's a $200 gift card... well, MasterCard gift card, Do what you like."**

Kai grinned, then grabbed the card, and ran out the door.

"... He left his ca-" Sei started, then Kai zipped back, grabbed his cake, them ran off again, laughing evilly. "-ke..."

**"And I have a dare for Lust!" Kaede said. "Kai, here's your chance. Lust, go on a date with Kai. No killing or injuring the birthday boy in anyway."**

Kai ran back, with half his cake left, and a huge grin on his face.

"... I feel like a pedo." Lust mumbled.

"BUT IT'S MY BIRTHDAAAAAAAAAY!" Kai whined.

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplea sepleasepleasepleaseplease?!"

"ALRIGHT FINE!" Lust shouted, and lifted Kai up, and carried Kai to the restaurant where Ling, Fu, Lan Fan, Mei, Gracia, Elysia, Nina, and all the other less used characters were working.

**"I think we gotta go," Gin said, pointing to the clock in the studio. "Are we bringin' Aizen-sama back wi' us?"**

**Kaede put her ear to the door. Inside, they were all still bickering. "We'll come back for him. Bye guys!" A garganta (portal) opened, and Kaede and Gin left.**

Right after they left, Aizen came out the room with shredded robes. "They left me?" He asked. Sei nodded. "Great. I'll just walk, then." He waved, and left the studio.

"... Shouldn't he be sucked into a vortex?" She asked.

"... It's anime. Best not to question it." Doc advises. "The next review is from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**." She says.

***Yelling outside the door***

**Aka- What do you think you are doing Sin?**

**Sin- Making an entrance.**

**Yuki- You can just walk in!**

**Sin- But that's boring!**

**Emi- Everything is boring to-wait, NO!**

**Aka, Yuki, and Emi- DON'T DO IT!**

**Sin- LET'S START THIS OFF WITH A BIG BANG!**

***The door explodes as well as the entire wall around it***

**Yuki- What the hell is the matter with you!**

**Emi- Apparently, everything.**

**Sin- That's true actually.**

**Aka- How did I create such a psychotic character?**

**Sin- Don't know, but how did you create the other characters?**

**Aka- No comment.**

**Emi- Anyway, moving on to the Dares.**

"... No comment." Everyone sweat dropped, looking up from their gambling.

**Yuki- First of all, Ed, we made you watch over Angel because she likes you. So deal with it.**

"... Well this is new." Ed mused, trying to look at the sleeping fox on his head.

**Emi- Also, how can you stand the pain of being hit on the head with a wrench nearly all the time?**

"Um, probably because of my thick skull." He says thoughtfully.

"Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure."

**Yuki- Come to think of it, how can you still be alive after all that?**

**Sin- I guess the pipsqueak isn't tall enough to die yet.**

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE CAN EAT A PEA AND BE SATISFIED?!" Ed exploded.

"... I'm guessing that's why..."

**Aka- OK THEN, MOVING ON! Sorry to ask this again but…Ed, Al, Roy, and Envy; who do you guys prefer out of these four girls.**

"Same answers as last time." All four say in unison.

**Angel- Really?**

**Aka- I'm running out of ideas!**

**Emi- Breda, why are you afraid of dogs?**

"Accident with circus dogs..." He mutters, and when questioned further, runs to join Roy with his James Bond movies and ice cream.

**Yuki- Winry, what do you like best about making automail?**

"Making it, and seeing how all the different parts fit together~" Winry sighs, roses blooming behind her,

**Sin- Mustang, why are you so obsessed with miniskirts?**

Roy comes out of the room for a second to answer: "A MAN HAS HIS NEEDS!" He shouts, and goes running back to his movies.

**Emi- Hawkeye, when did you start using a gun and why?**

"I started using guns when my father died, and when I joined the military." She replies simply.

**Yuki- Ling, why is it that you always eat so much?**

"Because I like food!" Ling replies happily.

**Aka- Huges, you can't gush over your daughter or wife for two chapters.**

"No problem!" Hughes nods.

**Sin- And to make sure of that, Ed and Mustang can get rid of them all in any way they want to.**

"Nah, I don't care." Ed yawned.

**Yuki- That's kinda mean.**

**Sin- I'm always mean.**

**Aka- Well that's all, bye.**

**Sin- *follows***

**Emi- *fixes the wall and door that Sin destroyed and leaves***

**Yuki- Sin might do that again, so I suggest that you should reinforce the wall at least. Bye! *leaves***

"Later!" Sei shouts as Kai and Lust come back from their date. "So how was it?"

"The best ever~" Kai sighs dreamily, and Lust rolls her eyes.

"Anyway, the next set of dares are from **Maruki Shitoichi**. Wow, it's been a while since she and Natsume have been here!"

**"Hi ya, Doc!" Maru greeted cheerfully. "Sorry for 'not' giving dares for awhile. You know, because of school and stuffs."**

"Haven't we all been there?" Doc nods understandingly. "I hate when that happens."

**"Anyway," Natsumi says, while coming out from the door with a big red moon catapult, "we heard, that, today is Kai's birthday. So we bought him this moon catapult."**

"Whoa!" Kai's eyes get as big as dinner plates. "How does it work?"

**"You can launch anyone with it, to the space." She smirked.**

Kai's wipe yes get even bigger, and he hugs the catapult.

**"Okay, I think that's it. Time for dares!" Maru clapped her hands together, with a smirk on her face.**

**"Mustang, I 'will' give you one 'dare/question pass' if you beat the crap out of Gin, from Detective Conan, not from Bleach."**

Roy comes out of his movie room, and nods. So he leaves using the portal.

After a while, he comes back with Gin's battered body. "I'm done."

**"Why do you hate him?" "He made Shinichi turned into a seven-year old, and kills people. What do YOU think?" "Never mind."**

**"Edsqueak, take Winry to a wrench convention. And 'NO' buts." **

"... Ed... Squeak..?" Ed asks carefully.

**Natsumi laughed, "it's a combination between 'Edward' and 'Pipsqueak'."**

Ed gets a tic mark, but calms down, and takes Winry to the wrench convention.

After the convention, Ed comes back with large welts on his head, and Winry has a large bag of new wrenches."Crazy woman..."

**Natsumi's sweat drops, "well, next time don't ** Winry, Edsqueak. You WERE in a wrench convention. She'll 'probably' bought a lot of wrenches to torture you." Maru laughed.**

**"So sucks on you, Edsqueak!"**

"BUT THAT'S WHAT SHE DID!" Ed complains.

**"Any-ho," Natsumi continued, "last dare for the day." As Ed cheered from the back of the stage.**

**"Yup!" Maru nodded. "Sorry Kai! But Doc, please throw him to Jupiter by using the moon catapult."**

"WHAT?!"

**"We DID say sorry, Kai." Natsumi replied, in monotone.**

Doc shrugs, and Kai jumps into the catapult. Doc pulls the lever button thing, and sends Kai flying to Jupiter.

After a few minutes, Kai comes back, flying on Toothless.

"... Didn't see that one coming."

**"Anyways, bye Doc~" Maru and Natsumi uses the moon catapult, and got thrown to Earth.**

"Bye!" Lynn shouts. "The last set of dares are from **Dragonlover17491**."

**(Chibi dragon lands on Kai's head) Happy birthday little guy! I got something for you. (Hands Kai a little ray gun.) **

"Cool! What is it?" Kai asks excitedly.

**It's the opposite gun, shoot the beam at someone and they'll act in the way opposite of their usual self.**

Kai looks at is confused, then fires the gun at Doc.

"Like, OmG, what am I, like, doing here with you, like, freaks!" Doc shouts in a snobbish valley girl accent. "I like, have no time for you! And what am I, like, wearing! Ugh! Where's my Abercrombie tee! And my like, super hot boyfriend! I want my daddy's private jet!"

Kai looks in horror at his sister, and re-fires the gun. Doc is back to normal.

**Now as for dares, let's get the ball rolling by making everybody sing the Spanish birthday song to Kai, the one from Dora the Explorer.**

"You heard the lady!" Sei shouts, and starts to sing. Soon, everyone joins in, and Kai bobs his head happily to the kiddie song.

**Next, Edward has to walk a tight rope while everyone else throws things at him.**

"I'm sorry, but Ed is in our hospital due to wrench injuries." Lynn explains.

**Then, Roy has to be shot out of a cannon with no helmet on.**

"Sounds good to me!" Sei says, and drags Roy to the cannon. Frantically, he waves his free pass. "Dammit..." She grumbles, and let's Roy go.

**Now, let's put Al in a Pedo bear suit and stick him in a public park. Let's see what happens.**

Doc quickly stuffs Al into a Pedo bear costume, and shoves him to the local park.

Several minutes later, Al is attacked by vicious mothers with purses. It wasn't a pretty sight.

**And finally, Riza gets to use Doc for target practice. Sorry Doc, thought it'd make Kai laugh.**

"I'm all for it!" Doc shouts, and spreads her arms apart. "I replaced her bullets with M&Ms~" She chuckles to herself, and gets quite a surprise when Riza fires actual bullets. "... dammit." She muttered when Riza pegged her multiple times upon her vital areas.

Kai claps and cheers when Doc falls dead.

**Well I'm done for now...oh wait, I forgot. (Dragon flies over to Envy, offering a cake.) Here Envy, for you.**

(Takes the cake unsurely.) "Uh, thanks I guess. Don't hate me anymore?"

**"No, just eat it Envy, it's good."**

(He takes a bite.) Tastes kind of funny. (He blows up into a million pieces.) 

**( Everyone sees me holding a detonator.) "He really needs to learn he can't trust me." (Sees everyone looking at me.) "What can I say? I'm cute, but I can be pretty EVIL." I say first cutely, then end it in a demonic voice.**

"Ok, ok! We get it!" everyone cowers in fear.

**"Now I have to fly, but I'll be seeing you!" I smile before kissing Kai on the cheek and fluttering away**

"Bye, DL!" Kai waves goodbye, rubbing his cheek lightly. "Well, this has been another fun filled episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, and the lights dim out at "The A-Team Theme" plays.

**A/N: Ending time: 8/10/12, 10: 43 am.**

**DONE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	14. Triple Doc's Triple Death

**A/N: I started a poll to see which stories I should be spending my time on. Vote, people, vote! Start time: 8/14/12, 11:49.**

Doc trudges in. "Yo." She waves to the camera. "We have some bad news. Lynn is no longer with us. We had some mayor budget cuts, which means that Lynn had to go, along with the large closet for storing the giant robot and Bigfoot. Those guys had to go too. Along with most of the rooms that we throw people in when they act up. We don't even use them.

"Well, without further adieu, this is..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts and runs out.

"Hey, sis, where's Lynn?" Kai asks.

"I just went over this! Budget cuts, remember? That's why we cut down on your Icees and we sent the theme songs out the window!" Doc face palms.

"Oh, right." Kai shrugs. "How about Havoc?"

"He's mourning."

"Oh okay. The first set of dares are from **animelover102.**" Kai says.

**hi everyone its me animelover102 back with dares and to say hi to people**

"Hey!" Everyone waves. "Where have you been?"

**yes finally doc thank you for updating lucy said**

"I was busy!" Doc explains indignantly.

"Busy being lazy." Kai snickers.

"Sei was at summer camp this whole time! How do you think _her _reviewers feel?!" Doc smacks Kai.

"Meh."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm at summer camp. I'm there every summer." Sei shakes her head.

"AND I MISS YOU!" Doc shouts and glomps Sei.

"I MISS YOU TOO!" Sei glomps Doc back.

**yes doc thank for updating and to clear up what happen hehe uhhh **

"Yeah... We all know~" Doc winks

"I don't know." Ed frowns.

"Yeah but you're stupid." Doc remarks.

"AM NOT!"

"Shaddup and let animelover continue!"

"Fine!" Ed shouts, then mumbles something about 'Damn women.'

**awkward turtles make awkward babies lucy said**

**ITS YOUR FAULT**

**ik but you still love me :D lucy said**

**-.- oh brother**

**anyway I'm running outta ideas but ill give the best dares**

"Yay!" Doc, Sei, and Kai shout, and everyone else frowns sadly.

**roy and envy: so when is the fight going to start**

"What fight?" Roy asked confused.

"The thing where Envy killed Hughes and you're still not over it." Sei supplies.

"Right." Roy nodded and pulled on his gloves. "YOU'RE GOUNG DOWN, PALM TREE!"

"IM NOT A FREAKING PALM TREE!" Envy shouts, and the two start fighting.

"MY STUDIO!" Doc shouts, and dives into the fight, causing one of those fight dust bubbles to appear with random limbs coming out. The dust bubble moved over to a random room with the door open, and the three tumbled in. Kai quickly shut and locked the door.

**i want to see some fighting :D lucy said**

**shes crazy people**

**and your bipolar -.- lucy said**

**IM NOT BIPOLAR **

**yes you are admit ok**

**.-.**

**hehehe lucy said**

"You can buy the DVD later." Sei says. "It's still being recorded."

**anyway back to dares sorry**

**al: dude your awesome will you be my brother cuz i hate my brothers -.-**

**yes yes you do lucy said**

"Sure!" Al smiles. "But why do you hate your brothers? Family members should love each other!"

"Have you ever lived with my sister?" Kai snorts. "You'd take that back in a second. She's crazy. She chased five boys around with a water gun. The guys were all bigger than her! She's creepy..." Kai shuddered.

"I don't believe that. Mostly." Al said.

"Oh really?" Kai raised an eyebrow, and pressed a button. Immediately, a TV came from the ceiling showing Doc in a bikini with a small purple water gun chasing five older boys.

"STAND STILL SO I CAN GET YOU, DAMMIT!" On screen Doc shouts, flames coming from her eyes.

"OH SHI-" The boys shouted, running for their lives. The TV fizzled out, and Kai re-pressed the button, retracting the TV.

"Now, do you believe me?"

"Yes."

**anyway hmmm those were my dares now lucy will give her dares **

**hehehe ok umm how about you *points to someone***

"Who, me?" Ed asked.

**yes you shorty -.- lucy said**

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE CAN FALL INTO A COUCH LIKE LOOSE CHANGE?!"

"They didn't say that..."

**anyway ed i dare you to go to a dairy farm and drink the milk they have there**

"I already did that! In Hell!" Ed shouts.

"Now you must do it again." Sei says, shoving Ed into the dairy farm room. "Tapes will be available later." She smiles.

Just then, Doc comes stumbling out the room, shirt, bra, and jeans ripped. She just had a random towel wrapped around her. Envy and Roy were in no better shape.

"Demon woman..." Envy frowned. "Why isn't she on the homunculi's side?" He muttered.

"Because I'm not stupid." Doc growled. "We'll, I need to change." She sighed, and spun in a quick circle. When she stopped, she was wearing new clothes, but her other injuries were still there.

"Let me try that!" Roy shouted. He spun in a circle, and only managed to make himself dizzy and fall on his face. "Ouch..."

**roy: your annoying throw yourself in the mary-sue pit with the cross dresser**

"Okay!" Doc shouts, taking Envy and Roy by their ears and kicking the door to the Sue pit open. then she threw the two down. "That was fun!"

**Winry: your even more annoying break all your wrenches **

Winry growled, but snapped her wrenches in half. "My babies..." She whispered.

**Riza: your awesome i respect you**

Riza nodded.

**ok lucy thats enough**

**what did you a favor in one of those dares lucy said**

**ik :D and now i respect you for that**

**anyway bye doc and thanks you for the update**

"You're welcome. Bye!" Doc waved. "Well, our next set of dares are from **Talon Graveshadow.**" She says.

**Talon walks in, no longer wearing the suit, eating a sandwich. **

"Where'd the suit go?" Sei asked.

"It kinda grew on me." Doc admitted.

"Sammich..." Kai drooled.

"... Idiot." Doc smacked Kai.

**"For my first trick, Envy, would you please come over here?" Talon finishes**

**his sandwich.**

Doc grins nervously. "Um, Envy's in the Sue pit now. But I can teleport him here." She nods to Sei, who powers up a large machine, which zaps Envy next to Talon. Envy's in even worse shape than before.

**"Thanks. Now, for my first trick, I am going to do this," Talon reaches down**

**Envy's pathetic excuse for a top, and pulls out some... unspeakable things**

**that Jack might be interested in.**

Jack starts to drool, and Envy starts to blush.

**"Now how did those get there? Care to answer, Envy?" Talon smirks.**

"A-are they yours?" Envy stutters.

**"No, they are NOT mine," Talon says.**

"Um, um, BLAST ME BACK TO THE SUE PIT!" Envy shouts, then dives back into the Sue pit.

"Huh. I guess that's a touchy subject."

**"Anyways, dares.**

**Roy, drink liquid Fire.**

Sei powers up her machine and zaps Roy next to Kai, who hands Roy the closest thing they could get to liquid fire: Extra spicy hot sauce.

"AHHH! HOT! HOT! HOT!" Roy shouts, dancing around.

"Oh, Roy!" A beautiful voice called, and everyone turns to the voice, to see that one of the Mary-Sues had escaped, and was running in slow motion towards Roy. "The fiery passion of my love will cool you down!" She shouts (beautifully). She latches onto him, and begin the make-out session.

Riza pulls out her gun, and shoots the Mary-Sue, and Roy pushes the girl off, back into the Sue-pit.

**Mother, explode.**

Mother shrugs, and presses his built in self destruct button. He explodes.

**Greed, I don't know what to do with you. So I guess you can just have some**

**cake." Talon yawns.**

"Sure." Greed smirks.

"Here's some cake." Doc offers Greed a piece of cake, and Greed eats it hungrily.

"Um, isn't that the explosive cake from Dragonlover?" Kai asks nervously.

"Yup." Doc snickers as Greed explodes.

**"Okay, just one question. Truth, who is your counterpart? And don't say you**

**don't have one. It's the law of opposites. Dark vs. Light, Good vs. Evil, Yin**

**vs. Yang, ect. Something cannot exist, without an opposite." **

"That's too easy. My counterpart is Lie. He lives in a realm of complete blackness, and when people die, they are sent to him. Our gates connect, so if someone dies during a visit with me, they are sent to him. He sends them to whatever afterlife they have, after revealing to them what they have done wrong, and what they could've changed to make it right." Truth explains.

"Oh."

**Talon then turns exactly 36 degrees to the south, waits 5.7 seconds, and walks forwards as a blue box appeared in a VWARP VWARP sound. He gets in, and leaves in the same way.**

"... I... Freaking... Love... That... Boy..." Doc says slowly.

"Um, sis?"

"No, man, not that way. But do you know how hard it is to find a male anime /Doctor Who fan?"

"Um... I don't know."

"Very hard. I've tried." Doc sighs. "Oh well. I'm still sticking to my anime crushes.

"The next set of dares are from **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**." Sei says, looking over to Doc, who was sniffing out for something.

**Kaede, Gin and Aizen burst through the door all slo-mo like with the James Bond theme playing. After the music ends, Aizen asks Kaede.**

**"Why did we have to do that? I feel like an idiot."**

**"Join th' club." Gin replied.**

**"Cause I- actually, I don't know why." Kaede said, scratching her head before breaking out in laughter. "HA! I MADE AIZEN AND GIN FEEL LIKE IDIOTS! VICTORY! Now Creator owes me $100.**

"Who's Creator?" Kai asks.

"Idiot."

**The REAL Devil'sEyeAlchemist13 walked in the door all slo-mo like (yes, again), with "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne playing in the background. "Someone say 'Creator'?"**

**Gin points to Kaede. "Tha' would be 'er, ma'am."**

**"Dude, you're not a cop." Kaede said.**

**"Don't ruin a man's fun." Aizen advised her.**

**"Here's the money." DEA13 handed Kaede the money she owed. "Now, I'll sit off to the side and see what my mind can do." She sat down in the corner next to Roy.**

**"First," Aizen said. "The winner of the pranking contest was actually a tie. The two winners are Envy and Kai. In a close second came Alphonse, and a three-way tie for third with Doc, Sei and Truth."**

"YES!" The six winners high fived each other.

"AH AM DA MASTAH PRANKAH!" Kai shouts, all cool-like.

**"Fer our winners," Gin pulled out two AK-47's and two rocket launchers. "Le' th' chaos ensue!"**

Kai and Envy grabbed at the AK-47's, but Doc held them back, motioning for them to wait.

**"Are those mine?" Kaede asked suspiciously.**

**Gin started quivering. "Maybe..." he then hid behind Aizen. "It was Aizen-sama's idea!"**

**"Sosuke Aizen, what the HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!" Kaede yelled as she took out a flamethrower.**

**"You can't kill me; I'm God." Aizen replied to the threat.**

**"Heh, and I'm the devil. With fire. What do you have? A pathetic little zanpakuto that makes illusions, that I can see through, may I add."**

**"I still have Ichimaru. Right, Gin... Gin?" Aizen turned around and then looked forward to see that his most trusted subordinate was over next to Kaede now. "**." And he began running.**

**"DAMN RIGHT YOU RUN!" Kaede chased Aizen out the studio and followed him to God-knows where. (heh, pun)**

"That was so worth waiting for." Kai smirks.

**"I guess you're doing the dares." DEA13 looked up from her TIME magazine.**

**Gin pulled out a clipboard with a list of dares written by Kaede and Aizen and read off the list.**

**Edsqueak: Go work at a zoo for a month.**

"He's busy with the dairy farm, but he'll work on that when he's done."

**Alphonse: Ya wanna go to Warriors again? Spend as much time as you like there.**

"YES!" Al shouts. And teleports out.

**Kai: Slowly torture three victims of your choice. That includes Doc, Sei and Lynn but not me, Aizen or Gin. Or Creator. She's have me erased if I allowed her to be tortured.**

"I know!" Kai made 'idea' hands. "I'll do Doc, Doc, and Doc!" He grinned.

"But there's only one of me..." Doc sweat dropped.

"But Sei could use her cloning machine to make two more of you!" Ed piped up.

"Shut up!" Doc glared daggers at Ed, who turned away wand whistled innocently.

"Goof idea!" Sei nodded, and shoved Doc into her cloning machine, which spat out two more Docs. Doc stumbled out of Sei's machine, and looked at her clones.

"Is that really what I look like?" Doc asked.

"Yeah." Doc #1 nodded.

"That zit on my chin is huge!" Doc #2 noted.

"OI!" Doc and Doc 1 growled. The three looked at each other, and broke out laughing

"Yeah, yeah. To the torture chamber!" Kai shouted, and grabbed his three sisters. Kai cackled madly and ran into a room. Pretty soon, everyone heard screaming, curses, and death threats. Plus flames licked the door frame.

"... All in favor of not going say Aye." Sei muttered.

"Aye." Everyone raised their hands.

**Flameboy: Back to MLP.**

"AW COME ON!" Roy shouted as Sei prepped her pony gun. She shot Roy, and Roy turned back into a navy blue unicorn with a short black mane and a red cutie mark of his signature transmutation circle.

**Homunculi, Dante, Father and Hohenheim: Join Roy.**

Sei prepped her gun again, and shot everyone listed. Including Envy, who had escaped the Sue pit when Talon left.

Lust turned into a black pony with luscious black mane and tail with a red ourobourus cutie mark, Gluttony turned into a dark brown pony with no mane or tail with a red ourobourus cutie mark, Greed turned into a black pony with a black spiky mane and tail and a red (I'm just gonna call it 'tattoo' now) tattoo cutie mark.

Envy turned into into a dark green pony with a darker green spiky mane and tail with a red tattoo cutie mark, Pride turned into a black colt with a short black mane and a black flank, Wrath turned into a black pony with a black mane and tail with a red tattoo cutie mark.

Sloth turned into a very large black pony with a black mane and tail and a red tattoo cutie mark, Dante turned into a dark purple unicorn with a black mane and tail and red crystal cutie mark, and Mother and Hohenheim turned into identical golden unicorns with gold manes and tails and crystal cutie marks.

"... We don't know..." They mumbled in unison.

**Military personnel (minus Riza and Havoc): You're going to Woodstock to enjoy the peace.**

"Sure." They shrugged, and jumped onto Roy, and rode off to Woodstock.

**Riza: I built you a personal shooting range. You're welcome.**

Riza nodded.

**Havoc: hmm, uh... just do what Lynn wants you to.**

"Sorry, he's still mourning." Sei frowned. "He'll get over it."

**Doc, Sei and Lynn: TO CANDYLAND WE GO! Well, you guys. I'm probably already out chasing Aizen, having Gin reading this out loud.**

All three Docs busted out of the torture room, and ran out with Sei to the door marked 'Candyland'. "YAY!"

**Everyone: Cosplay Bleach.**

**"Tha's gonna be funny; I wonder who's gonna be me?" Gin said as he finished reading the list.**

"We're just gonna list it."

Ed- Izuru Kira

Al- Sajin Komamura

Winry- Rukia Kuchiki

Ling- Gin Ichimaru

Lan Fan- Soi Fang

May Chang- Momo Hinamori

Hohenheim- Kisuke Urahara

Trisha- Masaki Kurosaki

Hawkeye- Nanao Ise

Roy- Shunsui Kyouraku

Havoc- Rose Otoribashi

Breda- Kaien Shiba

Fuery- Uryuu Ishida

Kimblee- Nnoritora Gilga

Scar- Kaname Tosen

Falman- Barragan Luisenbaum

Armstrong- Zommari Rureaux

Olivier- Tier Harribel

Father- Chojiro Sasakibe

Hughes- Isshin Kurosaki

Envy- Aaronierro Arurrurie

Lust- Rangiku Matsumoto

Gluttony- Marechiyo Omaeda

Pride- Toshiro Hitsugaya

Wrath- Kenpachi Zaraki

Sloth- Grand Fischer

Greed- Sosuke Aizen

Rose- Orihime Inoue

Kai- Shinji Hirako

Doc- Hiyori Sarugaki

Sei- Lisa Yadomaru

**"Wow, you actually read without that dialect. Why can't you talk normally like that?"**

**DEA13 asked.**

**"Uh, 'cuz it ain't written down. I read written fine. I's jus' talkin' wi'ou a script tha's th' problem."**

**"Well," DEA13 got up from the corner. "We'll be heading out now. Come on Gin, time to revive Aizen. Again." **

**And they left just like that.**

"Later!" Kai waved. "The final set of dares are from **Sushi Hawkeye**."

**"hey guys. We're back. Miss us?" rai's voice was heard as a life sized hologram appeared from a cookie Ling didn't see.**

"HOW DID I MISS THAT?!" Ling demanded.

**"uh...Rai, let's just do it script format. I feel a headache coming on," Sushi moaned in the background.**

**Rai: There. Happy? **

**Sushi: Yep. I feel like Roy burned me alive while Isaac McDougal was freezing my insides. *shudder***

**Rai: whoa. Makes me think of a dare. I want Roy and Isaac McDougal to do what Sushi just described to someone of Kai's choice. **

"DOC!" Kai shouted. "AND HER CLONES!"

"First we must summon Roy-pony and the Docs!" Winry shouted. "TO THE DOC/ROY SIGNAL!" She shouted, and lit up a large spotlight. Pretty soon, the Docs and Roy pony appeared.

"What up?" Roy pony asked.

"You have to burn Doc 1, 2, 3 while McDougal freezes their insides." Ed explained.

"Sounds fun." Roy pony shrugged (if a pony can). He used his horn to summon torrents of fire that burned all three Docs.

"AAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHH!" They screamed. McDougal summonedice vapor that went inside the three Docs, and froze their insides. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAGAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HAAAAA!" They screamed louder, and fell over dead.

"You do know when they come back to life next chapter they'll murder you all in cold blood." Sei bit her lip.

"Yes, but it's worth it for now."

**Alright. To business. First, happy birthday Kai! You deserve...uh...**

**Sushi: ice cream? My brother suggests lego-fy stuff.**

**Rai: Ok let's go with that. Or Kai can have anything he wants for an hour.**

Kai smirked. "I want to hang out with One Direction, and up my time for three years!" He smiled. Sei gave him a look and pointed him to a room that magically appeared. He squealed and ran into the room. Once there, he squealed louder. "OMG ONE DIRECTION!"

**Sushi: better. Dares time.**

**Just one more this time.**

**Rai: Tetris battle. Winner's prize decided by Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai.**

"I'll judge." Sei rolls her eyes. "Doc 1 2 and 3 are dead, Kai's occupied with 1D, and Lynn got laid off.

Soon, everyone was playing Tetris. After a long time of playing, Ed won. Sei gave him the cloning gun so he could clone himself to beat up Mustang. A lot.

**Both: bye!**

"Later everyone!" Sei waved. "This has been another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted, and waved as the lights faded out.

**A/N: Gonna be an Omake. Maybe. I'm deciding still... Nah, I'm not gonna do it. Oh well. Sorry, DEA13. **

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Sei, since she's the one not occupied at the moment.**


	15. Doc the Alicorn

**A/N: Only three sets of dares... I shall now call them PMs. Anyway, side note on my semi-personal life. I was hanging out with my three cousins, my aunt, my uncle, and Kai. We went on a mountain nature hike, and my second littlest cousin wanted 'a more adventurous trail.' Because of that, we got stuck climbing a steep boulder field. Not. Fun. At all. Especially because I was wearing jean shorts, and those are not good for climbing. They only worked because they are so freaking short. **

**Start time: 8/19/12, 3:51 pm.**

Doc skips in happily. "HEY PEOPLE!" She shouts happily. "I GOT MY BRACES OFF!" She bares her teeth to prove that her mouth is wire-free. "Now I have to wear a retainer at night." She holds up a hot pink case, and takes out two invisi-line (or whatever they're called) retainers and slips them in her mouth. "Now I thound like thith. I don't like it. It maketh my thpeecth inekthcoothable." She takes her retainer out and puts them back in her case. "Well, since I'm probably boring you with my story, let's get on with it, shall we?

"Well, this is another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts and runs onstage.

"Alright, the first PM is from **animelover102.**" Doc laughs.

**hello world and all who inhabit it my name is animelover102 and this is my co host lucy the dicloniuos**

**and welcome to... lucy said**

**OUR REVIEW me and lucy said together**

"WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, merely out of habit.

**alright first things first the fight for roy and envy was to see who gets to be free from me and Lucy's torture **

Envy and Roy look at each other, then back at Lucy and anime.

**soooo who won lucy said**

"I DID! NO, I DID! STOP THAT! NO! THAT'S IT, BUDDY, THE GLOVES ARE OFF! RAWR!" the two shouted, then attacked each other.

"How about we say they both won?" Kai asks.

"NO! STAY OUT OF THIS!" They both growled at Kai, who scrambled back, arms out in surrender.

After their lengthy fight, Roy won.

**anyway i only have a messge i have no dares **

**but i have dares lucy said **

**anyway ok heres mine **

**al- omg thanks for accepting *hugs* and i hate me brothers cuz there really mean and annoying -.-"**

"Well tell your brothers they better be nice to you or I'm gonna have to come over there." Al said jokingly.

**Alright now my dares lucy said**

**ok i choose you *points to someone***

"Me again?" Ed cried in frustration.

**Yes you again shorty i just really like messing with ya lucy said**

**ed- ok your getting annoying now cuz idk you just are so i dare you to ... uhhh break your automail ya that :D**

Ed frowned but transmuted his automatic so it was just useless metal sticks attached to his body.

**winry- your just too annoying throw yourself in the mary sue pit**

Winery tried to refuse, but was loaded into the moon catapult, and launched down the Sue pit.

**roy- your getting less annoying **

Roy smiled smugly. "Hah."

**envy- you can come out of the mary sue pit now**

Envy rolls his eyes. "Thanks a bunch."

**riza- can you teach me how to use a gun **

Riza nods and and starts going over the basics with Lucy. For about an hour. After that, Lucy has pretty darn good aim. Envy went screaming from the room.

**ok ok lucy enough now i just thought of a dare**

**which one lucy said**

**this dare is **

**everyone- play minecraft *the dare came from my brother***

"YAY!" Everyone shouted and ran to the computers.

**Anyway thats all bye and in the next review i have for everyone anyone bye :D**

"Bye!" Everyone shouts, looking up from their minecraft games.

"The next PM is from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**." Sei says.

***Aka comes in dragging Sasuke and a girl, with long black braided hair wearing a red shirt and black shorts***

**Emi- Tell me again why you dragged two completely different characters from a completely different anime here.**

**Aka- One, I'm too lazy to stay here; two, I promised Sin that she didn't need to come if she didn't want to; three, Zen doesn't wanna come either; and four, I just wanted to and they need to advertise my Naruto story.**

**Yuki- …Ok then. So me, Emi, Mika, and the pretty boy here need to do this without you?**

**Aka- basicly, yes.**

**Sasuke- But why did you need to drag ME into this?**

**Mika- And ME? Why couldn't you have brought Naruto and Sakura instead?**

**Aka- Because I dint want to, and Sakura would complain about Naruto anyway. By the way Ed, how are things going with Fox Angel?**

"Fox Angel is doing fine. She hasn't tried to kill me in my sleep yet, so that's a plus. Do I still need to watch her?" Ed says.

**Yuki- and Yes, you still need to watch her.**

"Oh okay." Ed nods.

"I thought you'd be more upset." Al noticed.

"As I said, Fox Angel hasn't tried to kill me in my sleep."

**Aka- *gives Mika a sheet of paper* Bye! HAVE FUN! *runs out the door***

**Emi- Why is it that when we come, we always start a long opening conversation with each other?**

**Yuki- Because Aka always has something to talk about. **

**Emi- That is true. These two are from Aka's Naruto story. Mika is Aka's OC.**

**Mika- If you don't know Naruto, look it up.**

**Emi- Any way, Roy. What do you mean by needs?**

"Well, um, uh... NOT SAYING. IT'S A MAN THING." Roy shouted.

"True dat, brother." Kai nods.

**Yuki- Next is …. wait.**

**Mika- What? *looks at the paper* Uh.**

**Sasuke- I'm not gonna ask.**

**Emi- *crumples the paper and stomps out the door* What the hell is the mater with that girl? I'm gonna pound her to a bloody pulp!**

**Yuki- Unfortunetly, Aka dragged all of us here just to read off ONE DAMN QUESTION! Oh and Ed, how are things with Fox Angel?**

"I thought I answered this already..."

**Emi- *yells out* You still need to watch her for a few more chapters!**

**Yuki- Wait for me Emi! I want to beat Aka up as much as you do! *runs out the door***

**Sasuke- … What was the point of dragging me here when I could have been doing something else better…**

**Mika- Should we follow them back to Aka's place? **

**Sasuke- You need to ask? *flash steps out***

**Mika- If Aka survives this beating, then you may see her after a few chapters. Bye. Wait up Sasuke! *flash steps out***

"Bye!" Kai waves. "The last PM is from the awesomest dude on fan fiction, ever, **Talon Graveshadow.**"

**Talon teleports in in a flash of light. Except he is now a MLP, A grey Earth**

**pony with a cyan music note cutie mark, a messy black mane, and dark**

**brown/gold eyes.**

"Oh. My. Freaking. God." Doc says happily.

"What's with the pony?" Kai asks, confused, looking at his sister.

**"Erm.. I don't know. I was in a pony mood," Talon shrugs his pony shoulders.**

**"OKay, Dares.**

**Doc, you are now a pony! But no one else is. An Alicorn, to be specific."**

Doc nods happily. "I can finally use the pony ray on myself! Sei, set it to Alicorn!"

"What's an Alicorn?" Sei asks.

"Just set it to Alicorn." Doc sighs. Sei shrugs, and sets the pony ray to Alicorn. She then shoots Doc. Doc then turns into a light pink pony with a light pink horn and light pink wings. Her mane and tail were a wavy mess of light brown with green eyes. Her cutie mark is an apple symbol. Like iPhone apple.

"YAY!" Doc squeals. "I should do this more often. Everypony should!"

"No thanks..." Everyone sweat drops.

**Talon then goes up to Mother, squints, and jumps on his head.**

**"I'm going to sit here for the rest of the episode/chapter."**

Mother growls, but doesn't do anything, as Sei was glaring daggers.

**"Ed, have a food fight with the Homunculi. Except Envy.**

"AW, YEAH!" Ed shouts, and runs to the restaurant, followed by the homunculi. There is an explosion. And everyone gets splattered by fajitas.

**Armstrong (Sparkles), go teach Envy the entire glory of the Armstrong family.**

"Do I _have _to?" Envy whines.

**Envy, you HAVE to listen to him." **

"Dammit." Envy groans, as Sparkles starts telling Envy about the glory of the Armstrong family.

**Talon then pulls out a small TV.**

**"Doc, do you like this scene?**

**/watch?v=aYaQVjF48eY" Talon sits back.**

"Well, I'm assuming that it has a YouTube . com in front of it, so yeah." Doc the Alicorn says. "But I freaking love that scene. 'I'm the Doctor. Basically, run.' Pure genius!"

**"I love it." TAlon then sits back.**

**"I'll be here all chapter, so... "**

"All chapter isn't very long, seeing as how we're at the end." Sei notes.

"Well, this has been another fun episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts as the lights fade out.

**A/N: fairly short, but I was kinda rushing through. End time: 8/19/12, 5:03 pm.**


	16. Crossover Madness

**A/N: Sorry I haven't gotten this out yet… I've been lazy… Plus, we're shortening it from four PMs a chapter to three. Why? Count the hosts…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. If I did, then Ed would kill all the bad guys. And there would be more sparkles. :D**

Kai and Sei run in. "Sorry, but Doc couldn't be here today. She's… doing stuff." The camera pans over to Doc's private room, which was painted a gold-ish blue with a large bookshelf painted to look like the TARDIS. Doc looked up to the camera and grinned.

"Sorry, but I can't come right now. I'll answer any questions, but Sei and Kai will handle the rest. Stupid summer reading homework…" She pouts, and the camera goes back to the main room.

"Alright," Sei says. "Welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts and runs out.

"The first PM today is from **Talon Graveshadow**." Sei grins.

**Talon walks up to Doc, and slings one arm over her shoulder.**

**"Yes, I AM a fan of Doctor Who, anime, AND My Little pony." He takes his arm off her shoulder.**

"Awesome!" Doc grins. "But how did you find my room?"

**"Anywho, I have one dare, and one question.**

**Ed, go to Equestria by Police Box and wreak as much havoc as possible for the**

**Changelings in one day." **

"Do I destroy _for _the Changelings? Or _against _the Changelings?" Ed asked. A beep sounds from Ed's pocket, and he takes out his phone. (Yes, they have a phone. How else am I supposed to call them back from Hell when they die or get off work?)

_Um… The Changelings are evil, and want to take over Equestria because they want to feed off of all the ponies' love. It doesn't make sense, but just go destroy a bunch of Changelings. _Ed read aloud.

"Well! I'll just go use the Police Box in Doc's room." Ed shrugged, and walked over to Doc's room.

A few minutes later, Ed was thrown violently out of Doc's room.

"IT'S A BOOKSHELF!" Doc shouted, then slammed her door shut. Ed rubbed his head in annoyance.

"Damn girl…"

"You know that we have a traveling Police Box over there, right?" Kai asked, pointing over his shoulder to an actual Police Box, and not Doc's bookshelf.

"… Yes." Ed mumbled and trudged over to the Police Box and walked inside. Since the coordinates were pre-set, the Police Box vwooped out of existence.

A few minutes later, Ed vwooped back into existence. When he came out of the Police Box with his clothes tattered. "That was fun." He grinned.

**"Doc, how many male Doctor Who/anime/MLP fans have you met?" **

"Well…" Doc considered, "I know a few dudes who like Doctor Who, and less guys who like Doctor Who and anime, but for all three categories, it's just you./" Doc explains.

**Talon then exits via Gluttony's stomach.**

Gluttony swallows, and then licks his lips. "That was yummy!" He grins.

"… The next PM is from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**." Kai says.

***A portal opens up out of no were and Aka runs out but falls on her face once she stepped out***

**Aka- … Hi every one. Was the last time I was here really that bad? It must be since they nearly killed me and would have if I hadn't gotten away when I did. Sasuke and Mika went far enough to use kunai and shuriken against me. Any way, moving on, and I need to do this quick:**

**Ed- Is Fox Angel the only, um, animal that I gave you that hasn't killed you by far?**

"Yes." Ed growls. "Even the stupid lizards tried to eat my face!"

"You do realize that it was the size of your pinky, right?"

"SIZE DOESN'T MATTER!" Ed roared.

**Al- You like foxes, right? Well you can have Serena; she's a juvenile Arctic fox. Keep her away from Ed just in case she might attack him or Angel.**

Al squealed in delight. "OMG A FOX!" He grabbed Serena and gave her a big Al hug.

"I take it he likes foxes…"

**Riza- Do you use any other weapons besides guns and the tazer?**

Riza nods. "Of course. While I prefer guns and the occasional taser, I'm pretty good at knife throwing and hand-to-hand combat. I'm also good with all types of swords, and I can throw an axe pretty accurately."

To prove her point, Riza takes a random axe out of a random closet and throws it millimeters away from Roy's face.

**Envy- Umm, never mind. Sin will kill me if I do anything bad to you…darn it.**

Envy grins evilly. "Revenge time~"

"NO." Sei growls and whacks Envy with a rolled up newspaper. "Bad Envy. No soup for you!"

"BUT I WANT SOOOOOOOUUUUUP!" Envy whines.

"NO."

"BUT-"

"NO."

***Door explodes***

**Aka- OH-NO! SOMEONE HIDE ME!**

**Sasuke- Oh no you don't. *grabs Aka by her collar***

**Emi- You're done here so you are coming back with us.**

**Aka- C'mon was it really that bad?**

**All OC and Sasuke- YES IT WAS!**

**Yuki- Ed, you still need to watch over Angel for now.**

Ed nods. "I can't get her off my head anyway." He points to his head where Fox Angel was still resting.

**Sin- Let's get goin'. *leaves***

**Yuki- *follows***

**Emi- *fixes door* Sorry about constantly breaking the door. Bye. *leaves***

Kai flips his hand dismissively. "I've gotten over it."

**Sasuke- *leaves while dragging Aka behind him* **

**Aka- Please have mercy.**

**Mika- If Aka isn't dead or not in the hospital by the time we are done with her, then she or we will be back by…probably…the next chapter or so. Ok, Bye.*leaves***

"Later." Sei says. "Hope they don't kill you! Alright, the last PM for today is from a person who we haven't seen in a while. **Ninja Demon Alchemist Arin**."

"I FINALLY GET THE HOLLOW BIT!" Doc shouts from her room.

"SHUT UP AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK!" Ed shouts back.

"YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!" Doc retaliates.

"JUST DO YOUR WORK!"

***The wall crumbles to pieces and walks in with a white figure who's insanely laughing***

**Hichigo: Yur' Better than tha' King! Mi Poco Erizo**

BEEP!

_He says "My little Arin." _Riza noted.

***Smacks him in the back of the head blushing***

**"Silencio y no me llame eso blanco fresa o él nos encontrará"**

Everyone's phones beep. It's another text from Doc.

_She says "Quiet, and don't call me that, White Strawberry, or you'll find us." I don't really get it either. _Sei read aloud.

**"It ain' my fault yur' cute"**

**"Sólo porque usted se ha arrastrado a Mobius y usted me vio transformanse en un erizo usted ha pensado eso"**

Another beep, another message from Doc.

_Now she says "Just because you have been dragged into Mobius and you saw me in a hedgehog transformation you thought that-" _Kai read.

***Looks outside searching for a carrot top***

**"Está claro…**

**Hi Everyone! Sorry I have problems on vacation at Puerto Rico"**

Another beep.

_She says "It's clear." _Al read.

**Hichigo: Yah' cause' ya' found me an' ran from tha' King to tha' tropics**

**Anyhow to the dares!**

**Envy: Listen to Tamaki (Ouran Highschool Host Club) and Lavi ( -Man) as they scream nonsense for the whole chapter**

Sei presses the portal button and summons Tamaki and Lavi. She locks the three into a room, and goes back to the dares.

"We'll see what happens later."

**Ed: try to steal Russia's (Hetalia) Pipes and Pickaxes**

Sei summons Russia, and Ed goes to try and steal Russia's stuff.

Ed does not survive.

"Kolkolkolkolkolkolkolkolkolk olkolkolkolkolkol~" Russia chants, freaking everyone out.

"BACK YA GO!" Kai shouts and sends Russia back.

**Armstrong: Have a weigh lifting compatition with America**

Sei summons America, who is in the middle of eating a burger.

"Whoa, dude! What am I doing here?" America asks.

"You're on Mars, and we need you to-" Sei starts.

"MARS! WHOA! THIS IS LIKE, SO COOL! ARE YOU GUYS ALIENS?"

"No, but-"

"DO YOU REALLY NEED MOMS?!"

"No, but can you-"

"WHY AREN'T YOU LITTLE GREEN MEN?!"

"Because we aren't-"

"ARE YOU TIME LORDS?! CAN YOU TRAVEL IN TIME?!"

"No, but can you-"

"JUST SHUT UP!" Doc shouts, then slams her door again.

"Look, Alfred, we just need you to do a weight lifting competition." Sei explains.

"With who?" Alfred asks, flexing his (tiny) muscles.

"Him." Kai points to Armstrong, who was flexing his (super large) muscles.

"Oh… Actually, I have food to eat, so bye!" America shouts and jumps back through the portal.

"Chicken…" Kai mumbles.

**Al: Go to the best mirror house maze and try to make it out in less than an hour **

Before Al can say anything, Kai shoves him into the conveniently placed mirror maze and shuts the door.

~Half an hour later~

"Is he done yet?" Kai asked Roy.

"I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS! IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!" Al's frustrated cries came from somewhere in the maze.

"I don't know." Roy shrugs.

**Also I actually found all the cats in another dimension so Devil'sEyeAlchemist13 didn't kill them here you go**

Greed takes a jump and throws all the cats into the maze as well.

"THIS IS EVEN MORE CONFUSING!" Al shouts. "IT DOESN'T JUST RAIN KITTENS! IT UNNATURAL!"

**Now its your turn Hichigo**

***Hichigo laughing insanely***

**Hichigo: So which one of you 'an resist fire ?!**

**Les' see if you 'an survive My Getsuga Tensho!**

"That's IT!" Doc shouts and stomps out of her room. "YOU ARE TOO LOUD AND I CANT CONCENTRATE!" She walks up to Hichigo, who starts shooting fire, and punches him. "I NEED A MOMENT OF SILENCE!" She starts punching and kicking him some more.

"Note to self: Never mess with a girl on her period." Denny whispers.

"Especially if she's from New York." Maes whispers back.

When she's done, Doc stomps back to her room.

**Shrimp (Ed): You must face tha wrath of Greed**

"Um, Ed's dead…" Greed deadpans.

**Pyromaniac (Roy): burn yur' whole office oh an' here yur' chiken' wife again *points behind roy***

Roy shrugs. "My work is in my office, so GLADLY!" Roy snaps his fingers and his office goes down in flames.

"Now your chicken." Kai says.

"BUT I DON'T WANNA!" Roy protests.

"Don't shout!" Ling whisper shouts, "Or she'll-"

"I HEARD NOISE!" Doc shouted. "NOW BURN YOUR CHICKEN OR I'LL DO IT!"

"Meep!" Roy squeals, and quickly burns Camilla. "I'm sorry, my love!"

***an orange top with a black shihakusho appears***

**Ichigo: ARIN! HICHIGO!**

**Both me and hichigo: OH $#!+ LATER**

***the wall is repaired and me and Hichigo disappear***

"Bye!" Kai waves. "Well, since Doc is almost done with her work, hopefully in the next chapter she won't be as pissed at us. Well, this has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts, then screams as Doc comes back out.

"I SAID SILENCE!" The lights fade out as Doc runs around on a rampage.

**A/N: Sorry about that… Oh well. PM if you have dares, review if you don't. SEE YA!**

**~Doc, Sei, and Kai**


	17. The Power of Eight

**A /N: *banging head on brick wall* I am really sorry about the wait. School started, I've got tons of homework, a few quizzes every week, plus some other things. Plus, I was procrastinating. Not sure why, but I was. I'm going to make it up to you by answering all dares in this chapter. :) Ow! *rubs head* Note to self: don't bang head on brick wall... Ouch...**

**Disclaimer: HAHA! I HAVE THE DEED TO FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST! TAKE THAT, ARAKAWA! **

**Lust: *slices it to pieces***

**Me: NOOOOOOO!**

Doc sneaks into the studio, trying to go without being caught, but fails when the floodlights turn on, catching her in a 'deer in headlights' mode. She immediately stands up straight and put her hand behind her head, scratching the back of her neck.

"Heheh, sorry about that. Im sorry about the wait, but during that time, we received a large donation from a mysterious Guest, so we were able to re-hire Lynn, and re-establish the theme songs! Which have changed, so yeah! Roll it!" She grinned, and pointed her finger in the air as "Gangnam Style" started to play.

When it finished, Doc was still rocking out, then apparently remembered that she had forgotten something. "Oh right! Sorry. Hello, and welcome to another crazy episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheered, and swarmed the screen, pulling back so that Doc stood in the center.

"Let's get moving, shall we? The first set of dares for today are from **Talon Graveshadow**."

**Talon walks up to Doc, and slings one arm over her shoulder.**

**"Yes, I AM a fan of Doctor Who, anime, AND My Little pony." He takes his arm**

**off her shoulder.**

Doc grinned madly, her euphoria blanketing the room, and causing Kai to smack his sister out of creeped-out-edness.

**"Anywho, I have one dare, and one question.**

**Ed, go to Equestria by Police Box and wreak as much havoc as possible for the**

**Changelings in one day." **

"For the Changelings or against the Changelings?" Ed asked. "Who are the Changelings?"

"The black ponies with creepy green eyes." Doc explains, and Ed nods. "You must destroy them. Get into the Student Driver's Police Box!" She shoves Ed into the SDPB, and it took off.

Not even a moment later, the SDPB landed, and Ed stumbled out, grinning madly. "That was awesome."

**"Doc, how many male Doctor Who/anime/MLP fans have you met?" **

"Well, if you start with Doctor Who, theres quite a few, including a guy that I converted. If you go down to anime, the number lessens, and if we go to MLP, the number decreases to just you. Not many guys see and understand the magic of aliens, anime, and friendship." Doc cries out melodramatically.

**Talon then exits via Gluttony's stomach.**

Gluttony burped, then pats his stomach. "Yummy."

Sei tries not to look somewhat grossed out, and steps up. "The next set of dares are from **XAka-kitsune-toriX**."

***A portal opens up out of no were and Aka runs out but falls on her face once she stepped out***

**Aka- … Hi every one. Was the last time I was here really that bad? **

"Yes, yes it was."

**It must be since they nearly killed me and would have if I hadn't gotten away when I did. Sasuke and Mika went far enough to use kunai and shuriken against me. Any way, moving on, and I need to do this quick:**

**Ed- Is Fox Angel the only, um, animal that I gave you that hasn't killed you by far?**

"Yes. Even the lizard tried to eat my face!" Ed complained.

"Lizards can't physically eat your face, Ed." Sei reminded him.

"TELL THAT TO THE LIZARD!"

**Al- You like foxes, right? Well you can have Serena; she's a juvenile Arctic fox. Keep her away from Ed just in case she might attack him or Angel.**

Al nodded, and gave Serena adoring eyes. "Aw, she's so cute!" He cooed.

**Riza- Do you use any other weapons besides guns and the tazer?**

"Yes. I just prefer those two. They're most affective."

**Envy- Umm, never mind. Sin will kill me if I do anything bad to you…darn it.**

Envy cackles. And makes the 'loser' mark on his forehead.

***Door explodes***

**Aka- OH-NO! SOMEONE HIDE ME!**

**Sasuke- Oh no you don't. *grabs Aka by her collar***

**Emi- You're done here so you are coming back with us.**

**Aka- C'mon was it really that bad?**

**All OC and Sasuke- YES IT WAS!**

**Yuki- Ed, you still need to watch over Angel for now.**

**Sin- Let's get goin'. *leaves***

**Yuki- *follows***

**Emi- *fixes door* Sorry about constantly breaking the door. Bye. *leaves***

"Well, now that Kai stopped freaking out about it, you're good." Sei comments.

**Sasuke- *leaves while dragging Aka behind him* **

**Aka- Please have mercy.**

**Mika- If Aka isn't dead or not in the hospital by the time we are done with her, then she or we will be back by…probably…the next chapter or so. Ok, Bye.*leaves***

"Later." everyone waves goodbye. Lynn steps forward, avoiding the shattered pieces of door, and smiles at the camera.

"The next set of dares are from **ninja Demon Alchemist Arin.**" She grins.

***The wall crumbles to pieces and walks in with a white figure who's insanely laughing***

**Hichigo: Yur' Better than tha' King! Mi Poco Erizo**

***Smacks him in the back of the head blushing***

**"Silencio y no me llame eso blanco fresa o él nos encontrará"**

"Shall I translate?" Doc asks, and Sei shakes her head.

"Let this be a ing between them." She advises.

**"It ain' my fault yur' cute"**

**"Sólo porque usted se ha arrastrado a Mobius y usted me vio transformanse en un erizo usted ha pensado eso"**

***Looks outside searching for a carrot top***

**"Está claro…**

**Hi Everyone! Sorry I have problems on vacation at Puerto Rico"**

"PUERRRRRTO RRRRRICO!" Kai cheers, and starts doing a bad version of the Salsa.

"Shut up, Kai." Lynn playfully smacks Kai on the back of his head, and the smaller boy collapses into his personal emo corner.

**Hichigo: Yah' cause' ya' found me an' ran from tha' King to tha' tropics**

**Anyhow to the dares!**

**Envy: Listen to Tamaki (Ouran Highschool Host Club) and Lavi ( -Man) as they scream nonsense for the whole chapter**

Lynn grinned evilly, and shoves Envy into a locked room, then Doc summons Lavi and Tamaki and shoves them into the room as well.

"This is being recorded!" Lynn sang, and skipped back to the center of the room.

**Ed: try to steal Russia's (Hetalia) Pipes and Pickaxes**

Doc summoned Russia, and shoved Ed over to the big man. Russia looked down at Ed, smiled, and waved. Ed considered his options, then blew into a special whistle that Winry made him.

Before anyone could say or do anything, a rumbling sound was heard, and a mob of RusAme fan girls swarmed Russia, lifting him up, and carrying him off, leaving the pipes and pick axes behind for Ed to take.

"Fangirl whistle. Never fails." Ed laughed as everyone sweatdropped.

**Armstrong: Have a weigh lifting competition with America**

Doc summoned America, and stood him next to Armstrong, placing a set of weight next to each of them.

"Ready, set, LIFT!" Lynn called, and the two men started lifting heavier and heavier weights, until Armstrong just lifted up America, who squirmed around in Armstrong's iron grip."

"ARMSTRONG WINS!" Lynn declared, blowing her whistle.

The rumbling came back, and the fangirls grabbed America this time, carrying off the so called Hero to wherever they were going to take him.

Upon closer inspection, Lynn realized that she had grabbed the wrong whistle.

**Al:Go to the best mirror house maze and try to make it out in less than an hour **

Lynn shoved Al into the mirror maze that we never knew was there, and set the clock for an hour.

After the hour was up, Al emerged from the other end, looking freaked out and paranoid. "So. Many, MIRRORS!" He wailed, and ran off to join Kai in his emo corner.

**Also I actually found all the cats in another dimension so Devil'sEyeAlchemist13 didn't kill them here you go**

"Yay." Al muttered, holding his cats in the corner. "Not even they can help! WAH! I don't like mirrors anymore!"

**Now its your turn Hichigo**

***Hichigo laughing insanely***

**Hichigo: So which one of you 'an resist fire ?! Les' see if you 'an survive My Getsuga Tensho!**

"Okay." Doc shrugs, and steps up. Hichigo laughs, and sends a torrent of flames at Doc. When they die down, she's still standing there, remote in hand.

"Sorry, but you can't kill me that easily." She grinned. "Nobody can."

**Shrimp (Ed): You must face tha wrath of Greed**

"Sorry," Ed snickered. "He's not here right now. Please leave a message after the beep. Boop!"

"What did you do?"

"Why do you assume that I did something?" Ed asks defensively.

"Because you're holding the Fangirl whistle."

"Oh..."

**Pyromaniac (Roy): burn yur' whole office oh an' here yur' chiken' wife again *points behind roy***

"NOT CAMILLA! ANYONE BUT HER!" Roy cries, begging for mercy. "Bit my office I will do." He snaps his fingers, and burns down his office.

"Burn the chicken, Roy." Lynn encourages.

"Do it, do it, do it, do it!" The chant takes up the whole room, and reluctantly, Roy sends a tiny burst of fire at Camilla, singing her tail feathers. She squawked indignantly, and started to peck Roy's knees.

"IM SORRY, MY LOVE!"

***an orange top with a black shihakusho appears***

**Ichigo: ARIN! HICHIGO!**

**Both me and hichigo: OH $#!+ LATER**

***the wall is repaired and me and Hichigo disappear***

"Well, later." Kai waves, then faces the camera. "The next set of dares are from **Sushi Hawkeye**."

**"Hey guys!" Rai walked out from a swirling red, black, and violet portal. "Sushi's got to do some auditions for their school play."**

"Then why did she review in the first place? PLAYS ARE MOR IMPORTANT THAN THIS!" Doc proclaims, then Kai smacks her.

**"First, I dare Ed to be kitty-fied."**

Kai presses a button on the wall, and fires a blast at Ed, turning him into a Nero,

**"For my second dare, I dare En-"**

**"Damn it!" a voice called out from the still open portal. Another Edward Elric (only with hair cut above the shoulders) stepped out from the portal.**

"Mrow?" Neko-Ed asks confusedly.

**"Sushi! Done already? And why are you dressed like Ed?"**

**"Yeah. Dressed like Ed 'cuz this is my top choice IF the cosplay at school will push through at November. Other choices are Crona (Soul Eater) and Link (Legend of Zelda). And as for the play auditions, no one voted for me. Out of the 9 people that were there, excluding 4 judges and us 3 contestants, no one voted for me. Cute." Sushi rolled her eyes.**

"WHAT?!"

**"Again?!" Rai yelled out.**

**"Yeah. And it's pretty obvious that it's because I'm me. DAMN DISCRIMINATION!" Sushi shook her fist at the air. "So, what dare are you doing?"**

**"Second. The one with-" **

**"Envy! Yes, my favorite dare for now." Sushi cut Rai off again. "I dare Envy to turn into a human 10 year old kid. But you'll look like a palm tree still you know."**

Kai goes over to the room where Envy is locked up in with Tamaki and Lavi, and pulls him out.

"OH THANK GOD! I KEEP KILLING THEM BUT THEY KEEP COMING BACK! THE TALKING NEVER CEASES!" Envy wailed.

"Well, you are going back in when Sushi's done with you. So let's get this over with." Kai says, and presses another button on the wall, firing a blast at Envy, who turns the palm tree into a palm tree ten year old.

"WHAT?!" The preteen palm tree demands, "WHAT IS THIS?! WHY AM I THIS WAY?!"

"Shut up."

**" next dare! Now, 10-year-old human Envy plays with Elysia. And Mei." Rai sighed in relief that she wasn't cut off by Sushi again.**

"WHY SHOULD I DO THIS?!"

**"You are actually best friends, the three of you, in the fic that inspired this dare." Sushi declared.**

"Okay, play time." Kai says, and pushes the three into the play room with the transparent wall. In the first few seconds, Envy pushes himself against the glass wall, and demands to be let out, as Mei and Elysia were trying to play with his hair.

**"Fourth dare!" Rai shouted!**

**"I think there's none left."**

**"Your brother dared them to be teleported to his videogame called Super Smash Bros. Brawl." Rai reminded.**

**"Really? like...that level with the maze thingy with doors, flipsides, and boss fights?" said Sushi.**

**"Yeah...that's the one. Winner gets away from one dare from either of us." Rai declared.**

"I FREAKING LOVE THAT GAME!" The four hosts cheer, and Doc presses a button that teleports everyone into the game. Doc, Sei, Kai, and Lynn choose to be Kirbys, and eat everyone, gaining their powers, so yeah. They pwn everyone. Apparently Kai wins, because he had the power of the Icees.

**"Oh, and Havoc? Tough luck. To both of us. It'll be alright dude. I mean, don't you have communication or something? It's not like she broke up with you...right?"**

"I'm right here, ya know!" Lynn states, and gives Havoc a big hug.

**"By the way, any suggestions for cosplay?" Rai asked Doc and Sei.**

"What do you look like?"

**"I got shoulder length black hair and is 5'2"." Sushi added. "My friend will go with me. She's around 5' and has kinda long black hair."**

"Rukia and Lust." Doc says, and Sei nods.

"We could get something better, but that's at the top of our heads right now." Sei explains,

**"Thanks! Bye!" both girls jumped back through the portal, which exploded into chocolate mint ice cream. That splattered over everyone and everything.**

Kai licked his face, as did his sister. They grinned, and started to lick everything and everyone coated in ice cream. When they were done, they got a bunch of awkward looks, then he steps up to the camera again.

"The next set of dares are from **kuttiepie3**." He grins.

**I'M BACK BABY! IT'S MWA KUTTIEPIE! DID YOU MISS ME! WHY AM I SHOUTING! **

"YES WE DID MISS YOU, AND YOU'RE SHOUTING TO GET YOUR PIINT ACROSS!"

**Anyway**

**time for dares. Have you ever seen pewdiepie if you have, Kai activate chair**

**mode! **

"Yes ma'am!" Kai grinned, and activated chair mode.

**Also Roy destroy all the barrlez! They are evil, they tell the fangirls where**

**you are!**

"THE BARRLEZ MUST DIE!" Roy proclaimed, and destroyed them all.

**Ed? I have a question. Do you hate chocolate milk? If you do. *smacks him* I**

**hate your guts! And I used to look up to you! what was I thinking! *pushes him**

**out the front door* AND DON'T COME BACK! *slams door closed* Oh I had to get**

**that out of my system. well bye bye. *disappears in a giant mushroom cloud***

Ed comes out of the door, and slumps to the ground. "This is why I hate people." He mutters, and falls unconscious.

"Goodbye?" Kai scratched his head.

"The next set of dares are from **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**." Sei says.

**In walks Kaede, Gin, Aizen and DEA13, struting in like they own the place.**

**"Hichigo? HICHIGO!" Kaede yells as she frantically starts looking for Hichigo.**

**"Um, Kaede. He left already." DEA13 said, once again in the corner reading the latest issue of TIME. **

"He left with Arin." Sei explained.

**"DAMMIT!"**

**"I don't see why you'd want to be around a hollow all the time." Aizen said, subtly questioning Kaede's motives.**

**"Why would you ask that? She hangs around you all the time." DEA retorted, not looking up from her magazine. "That goes for you too, Foxface."**

**"We ain't hollows, though!" Gin exclaimed, his smile disappearing.**

**"No, but you certainly are shells of your former selves. And what are shells?"**

"Hollows!" Alphonse calls out happily.

**"Yes, they are hollow, Alphonse. And I thought Kaede killed those cats... oh well. Saves me a click of the delete button in my inbox."**

Al immediately went from happy back to emo corner,

**"Don't you have something to say?" Aizen pulled the magazine out of DEA's hands.**

**"Hey! I was reading that!"**

**"And now you're doing dares."**

**"...Yes, Aizen...bastard..." she muttered. "The reason I'm...bitter, today is because my stocks have dropped, and I've lost most of my money for my show's paychecks. What does this mean? I NEED MONEY! Because, if I don't have paychecks every week, I get sued."**

**"So," Kaede said, still running around looking for Hichigo. "We need ideas for fundraisers!"**

"My Little Pony-" Doc started.

**"No Doc, we're not doing anything MLP related. We can't solicit money from little kids." DEA13 said.**

"Dammit..." Doc grumbles. "What's wrong with ponies?"

**"Well, ya could..." Gin said.**

**"WE'RE NOT BREAKING THE LAW!"**

**"Why not?" Kaede questioned. "I've done it before."**

**"I don't ca- WHAT?!"**

**"Nothing~" Kaede hid behind Gin.**

**"Well," Aizen began. "I do want my paycheck on Friday."**

**"No ifs ands or buts. OR butts, Gin." DEA pulled out a chalkboard and a stick of chalk. "Any ideas?"**

"Webathon!"

**"Nah..."**

"Telethon?"

**"No, that costs a lot of money. Though it does make a lot, I'd still be back at square one.**

"Prostitution?"

**"Do we look like harlots to you?" The guests told Envy. "No! Prostitution is OUT of the question!"**

"How about a bake sale?"

**"BRILLIANT!" Kaede exclaimed. "A BAKE SALE!" She turned to Aizen and Gin. "Sosuke, send Szayel to the World of the living and find some recipes for cookies and other sweets. FMA cast, you're searching Amestris for recipes. Gin, get your lieutenant to bake his brownies. GO GO GO!"**

"YES MA'AM!" Everyone mentioned saluted, and they hopped off in respective portals.

After everyone came back and the recipes were set up, DEA did her inspection.

**"Excellent!" DEA said, looking at all the emails of recipes from the FMA crew, Izuru (Gin's lieutenant) and Szayel. "Now, we need the six best cooks in the room to come with us and make all the treats. **

"Well, you'll need me, Winry, Gracia, Izumi, Pinako, and..." Sei searched the cast, and Doc started to raise her hand excitedly.

"OH! ME ME! PICK ME!" She cheered happily, and Sei shook her head.

"Someone who _won't _burn the kitchen down." Sei deadpanned.

"How about me?" A voice came from the back, and the crowd parted to show Doc's mom.

"GENIUS!" Sei exclaimed, and the six women made their way to the kitchen to start cooking.

**Mustang, I need you, Hawkeye, Fuery, Havoc, Breda and Falman to set the prices and put the advertisements around. Doc, keep Kai AWAY from the kitchen. Let Operation We've Got Cookies BEGIN!"**

"Yes ma'am!" The six military officials went to advertise, and Doc threw Kai into the Icee room.

**3 ( :.:) (cookie)**

**Kaede ran her fingers through all the cookies and cakes and little treats! "Thank you guys so much! Now, me and Aizen and Gin will get paychecks!"**

**"Hono Sainara!" DEA said, dragging Aizen and Gin out. "Gin! Drop the Chocolate mousse mouse now!" Gin dropped the little mouse shaped chocolate and was dragged through the portal. Kaede opened her own, and took all the treats with her. Well, except for Gin's chocolate mouse; that she ate. :)**

"Bye!" Everyone waved, and them Doc turned back to the camera.

"And here's **Talon Graveshadow **once again." She grinned.

**Talon falls from the ceiling, face-planting on the floor.**

**"Oh god, hide me!" Talon rushes to wherever Doc is, and hides behind her.**

**"It's...its'..." Talon mutters...**

"What is it?" Doc asked concerned, and presumed a defensive stance.

**A huge explosion opens up the front wall, but it does not show Mars. No. It shows...**

**"YAOI FANGIRLS!" The rabid hoard of Fangirls rush to every male in the room, (Except Talon, who is quivering behind Doc) and attempt to take them away.**

"AAAAAAAAAH!" The men cried, and Kai started to thrash among the fangirls.

"I DON'T WANNA BE PAIRED WITH SOMEONE!" He protested.

**"GET THEM RIZA! DESTROY THEEEMMMMM!" Talon yells, before yelping and ducking back behind Doc.**

Riza's eyes got a dangerous glint, and she cocked her gun. Doc shook her head, and tossed Riza her remote. Riza grinned evilly, and started pressing random buttons.

The fangirls suffered. :)

**After all the mess was cleaned up (With some of the males rather worse for ware,) The studio was a mess. Massive burn marks covered the walls, smatterings of lipstick and yaoi fan art were scattered everywhere, and Ed was now in his boxers.**

**Talon slowly stands up, looking out from behind Doc's shoulder.**

**"Are...are they gone?" **

"Yup." Doc affirmed.

**Talon then straightens up, and brushes himself off.**

**"Sorry about that... I sort of pissed off the goddess of Yaoi... Who happens to look very much like an odd mesh of Aphrodite and Ares. Anyways, Sorry about the mess, I'll clean it up later. But, I must get to my dares!" Talon whips out a piece of paper, and some glasses very much like the Tenth Doctor's. **

**"Ed, go prance around in Central while screaming to the skies, "ROY MUSTANG IS FAR SUPERIOR TO ME!" in your military uniform. **

Ed started grumbling about 'stupid' stuff, and Roy just laughed and laughed.

"ROY MUSTANG IS FAR SUPERIOR TO ME!" Ed shouted to the streets of Central, and Roy fell on his backside laughing.

**Roy, since I know you're laughing, go... oh I don't know. Do fourteen pounds of paperwork in one hour.**

Roy immediately stopped laughing, and glared at Talon, but complied, in fear of insulting the yaoi goddess for some reason, or worse, the hosts.

**Greed, live as a homeless person for eighteen and a half weeks, while wearing a donkey costume." Talon folds up the paper.**

"WHAT?!" Greed demanded, and Doc just held out a donkey costume.

After threatening bodily harm to Greed, he agreed, and eighteen and a half weeks later, Greed was back, and he locked himself in his room and refused to come out.

**"And everyone else, you guys get a free vacation to wherever you want!" Talon then walks out the door, randomly smacking Envy on the way out with a blueberry pie.**

"OI!" Envy shouted, and started to chase Talon, but Doc picked up the discarded pie, and threw it at Envy again.

"We shall take our trips during the chapter break." She assured, and everyone waved goodbye.

"The next set of dares are from **Ninja Demon Alchemist Arin**. I think DEA was looking for Hichigo. He with you?" Lynn asked.

***A white and gold great dane comes dashing in with a white lab***

**! #3! mosquitos!**

**How can you stand that Krypt I understand superhero business but they itch like #3¡**

***Starts scratching furiously***

**Krypto: Remember the resistance to needles, anyhow aren't you half devil?**

**Ugh guess ill have to hold it in for a while till I'm done.**

**Okay first of all Greed try to steal Sonic's chili dogs if you can**

Greed was too busy sulking to even try. Sorry.

***Twilight appears out of my shadow***

"GHOST!" Kai exclaims

**Twilight: I expected alfred to actually go against armstrong since he has that super human strength to be able to swing a bull and drag a car so that was unexpected of America**

"Blame the Fangirl whistle." America grumbled from backstage.

**Yup very true**

**Twilight: Truth have you ever visited the realm of twilight?**

"No." Truth said. "I find it bland and boring."

"You're one to talk." Someone scoffed.

***Nira comes out of my shadow***

"MORE GHOSTS!" Kai exclaimed.

**Nira: again Arin how many traps are you gonna fall into till you stop**

**As many until through every world dimension and universe plus did you forget what ever I go through you get the same affect**

**Nira: $#!+ why do I even have to deal with you all the time**

**Well get over it everyone stop using my shadow as a teleportation I may be a traveler but & # # ##!+ its enough Im already on the wanted list and have people who want to fight me**

**Nira & Twilight: Fine**

***Twilight leaves***

**Nira: Ed what would you do if you could change the world?**

"I would make it so that there were no idiots, and animals wouldn't exist to claw my face off." Ed nodded.

"You're so mean..." Al whispered.

"I just worry about my safety!"

**Krypto: You better not even try you already tried this**

**Now go home Nira next time use Nado he's over by Sora Roxas and Ventus today**

***Nira jumps back into my shadow***

**Its getting cold in hear any how so we better leave and stop that dramatic lizard from freezing the world into an ice cream pop.**

***jumps on to a nearby meteor and jumps away***

"Goodbye!" Everyone waves, and Doc looks at the camera.

"Well, this has been another fun filled and long episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheered, and "50 Ways to say Goodbye" plays as the lights dim out.

**A/N: There. Done. *collapses onto bed* Now I can sleep well knowing that I have satisfied all you people. I hope you enjoyed all eight sets of dares. Double what I normally do, but oh well. Good night. *falls asleep***

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't. **

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	18. Drag Races

**A/N: *bangs head in table* I now realize that I didn't have to do the first four sets of dares because I already did them in the previous chapter. Oh well. Now you can see what happens when I'm doing homework vs. when I'm high of off Macadamia nut cookies and five apple juice boxes. Well, I'm just going to do the two sets of dares I have now and do that. Yeah. Okay.**

Doc literally waltzes in an invisible partner, her eyes closed, and humming a tune that sounds suspiciously like "Enchanted" by Taylor Swift. She just twirls around when her phone buzzes. She stops dancing for a second to check the message.

"Oh, this is live? Oh... You didn't see anything." She informs the camera. "Anyway, this is a two-dare chapter, addressing the only two sets of dares we have so far because I didn't update for a while. Oh well. Welcome to another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and dances onscreen as "Gagnam Style" plays.

"This first set of dares are from **Dragonlover71491**." Kai says. "Hello DL!"

**(Mini black dragon lands on Riza's head, looking exhausted.)**

Riza growls and clenches her fists, but refrains from pulling out her gun.

**Sorry I haven't been with you guys for a bit. But with my work as a**

**housekeeper, and working on my own stories, it's been impossible to check in**

**on you guys.**

"You're a housekeeper?" Kai asks, "I didn't know that. Can you clean my room for me?"

"You're an idiot." Doc deadpans, and swats her brother with a rolled up newspaper.

"Ow!"

**Anyway, I only have two dares today. First: Doc, Roy, and Ed have to have a**

**drag race, winner gets a philosiper's stone. (Holds up tiny red stone.)**

"I'm not sure it's real." Ed says skeptically. "It's too good to be real."

"I'm in agreement." Roy nods.

"I'm pretty sure it's real." Doc contradicts.

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, she has a potion that helps us come back to life when we die in the middle of a chapter, so I'm pretty sure that it's real." Doc shrugs. "So are we going to race or not? I'm going to kick your asses anyway."

"Oh, it's on now, woman!" Roy growls, and Ed nods in agreement.

"Great!" Doc claps, and uses her remote to summon three go-karts. One painted to look like the TARDIS, one red with flames on it, and another painted pure gold with a black Flamel symbol on the hood. Doc jumps into the TARDIS kart, and grins. Ed and Roy get into their karts, and line up at the starting line.

Sei holds up the flag, and blows her whistle hard as the three take off! In the start, Roy's ahead with Doc and Ed following closely, then near the middle, Ed passes Roy, who swears up a storm, and by the end, Doc had passed both boys while they were busy bickering.

"I WIN!" Doc cheers.

**(After the race, turns out it's a real one.) And surprisingly, I made it out**

**of a blood substitute.**

Doc grins happily, and takes her new stone to her private room. After a few seconds of exaggerated drilling and hammering noises, she emerges again with a new pair of red stud earrings.

**And also, all the fma girls have to give a kiss to their loves, otherwise**

**they're going to be locked in the mary sue pit for a month.**

"What if we don't a have a love?" Roza asks, leaving Roy deflated on the floor.

"I'm guessing that you have to kiss the guy you're paired up with the most." Lynn shrugs.

(I'm just going to do it like this)

Winry kissed Ed

Riza kissed Roy

Mei kissed Al

Izumi kissed Sig

Martel kissed Greed

Lust kissed a mirror

Envy kissed a coconut

Sloth gave Wrath a kiss on his head

Gracis kissed Hughes

Elysia kissed Pride (much to Hughe's disappointment)

Rebecca kissed Havoc (much to Lynn's disappointment)

Mrs. Bradley kissed Bradley

Olivier kissed Miles

Lan Fan kissed Ling

Armstrong's mom kissed Armstrong's dad

**Glad to be back, now I have to leave...after a short nap. (Makes nest on**

**Riza's head before curling up to sleep.)**

This time Riza did draw her gun, but Doc used her new earrings to turn the gun to mush. :)

"The last set of dares are from a **Guest **user who is currently reading this. He/she only submitted one dare, so yeah." Sei says.

**Can you make Ed watch a whole season of my little pony friendship is magic**

"Yes I can!" Doc grinned smugly.

"No you can't!" Ed protested. And Doc just grinned evilly.

"Oh, Ed, you of all people should know what I can and can't do. INTO THE ROOM OF VIEWING!" She shouts, dragging Ed into the Room of Viewing.

A few days later, Ed and Doc exit the room, Ed twitching and Doc grinning madly.

"Too... Many... Ponies..." Ed groans before flopping onto the ground.

"I don't know what he's talking about. It was delightful! Well, this has been a really short episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts and the lights fade out as "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" plays.

**A/N: Short, I know. But you people need to leave dares for me! Otherwise there is no show! Also, if you were to boot one of the hosts off the show, who would you give the boot to? Just curious. *brandishes earrings***

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	19. Ice Cream Kai With a Cherry on Top

**A/N: I'm going to do some assuming right now, and say that you people really want Rick Riordan's new book, The Mark of Athena. Well guess what. I HAVE IT! I got it the night it came out, well, it was on my bed the next morning, so I'm going to assume that it was out there the night it came out, and I finished it yesterday. IT WAS AWESOME! No, I will not give out spoilers, nor will I write a fanfiction on it. Well, I might, but that's if I can think of any... Meh...**

**Disclaimer: I do not in any way own Fullmetal Alchemist. But I do own a 10th Doctor outfit for Halloween! :D**

All the lights in the studio flare on as Doc races in, does a front handspring and lands on her feet in front of the camera. "Now if only I could do that in real life..." She chuckles, and looks at the camera. "Hello, my little ponies, and welcome to this episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everybody cheers and comes onstage as "Gangnam Style" blares on the speakers.

"Today we will be starting off with everybody's favorite kitty, **kuttiepie3**!" Sei announces.

***giant waves of water rush in knocking everyone against the back wall* **

"YOU CANNOT WASH ME AWAY, I AM THE SON OF POSEI-" Kai screeches, and gets washed away.

"Some demigod..." Lynn mutters.

***I come out of the door and slammed the door* Okay, not trying that again. *turns to characters* Um, I'll pay for the water damage.**

"Yes you will be paying for the water damage. Haven't you seen "Waters of Mars?" We're doomed, I tell you, DOOOOOOOMED!" Doc cries. Kai shakes his head, and smacks his sister to snap her out of her Doctor Who trance thing.

**Soooo... to the dares.**

**Ed! Watch my two devil of little brothers for me, let me give you a hint, if**

**they are carrying a blanket run away from them, anyone who is unlucky enough**

**to be trapped under it will most likely be sat on and nearly smothered to**

**death. (true fact) It happened to me, let me tell you not fun. DO NOT BE**

**FOOLED BY THERE ADORABLE PUDGY FACES! THEY ARE EVIL!**

Kuttiepie's brothers come running through one of the doors, giggling like mad, and dragging a fairly large blanket.

"They look harmless to me-GAK!" Ed says as the two boys smother Ed with the blanket and sit on it, still giggling.

"IM GONNA KILL HER!" Ed screams, his voice muffled from the blanket.

"She did warn you." Lynn shrugs.

"I DONT CARE!"

**For envy, I will hand you over to my best friend who loves to dress anyone up.**

**It doesn't matter to her if your a boy or a girl, she will do it!**

Kuttiepie's friend comes through bother door with a mischievous gleam in her eyes, and heads straight for Envy. She tackles him to the floor, and starts to drag the palm tree back through the door she came from.

"NO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! I REFUUUUUUUSE!" Envy wails, dragging his nails on the floor as he got closer to the door.

A few minutes later, kuttiepie's friend comes back out, dragging Envy, who is now wearing the most ridiculous dress, complete with frilly pink ruffles, large purple bows, the whole shebang.

After a short silence, everyone burst out laughing, except for Ed, who's still trapped under the blanket. Doc wipes tears from her eyes and starts taking multiple photos.

"Just so you know, these will be on sale in the gift shop." She smirks.

**Roy, I don't like you.**

"I think we all know that." Roy grumbles.

**And lastly for sei, um what happens when you get hyper, when I try to picture**

**it I kinda imagine a maniacally laughing evil scientist. No offense.**

"Let's test it out, shall we?" Lynn puts her hands together. "Let's use the scientific method! First, what's the purpose?" She asks, donning a lab coat and goggles.

"To see how Sei will react when hyper!" Everyone replies.

"Good! Now let's make a list of things we need!"

"We need Sei and sugar!"

"Awesome! Now how are we going to do this?"

"Lock Sei in her lab when she's hyped up on sugar and film it!"

"What's our hypothesis?"

"She'll do something crazy!"

"I'm standing right here, you know." Sei sighed.

"Oh... Sugar?" Doc asked, handing Sei a bowl of sugary halloween candy.

"Eh, what the heck." Sei shrugs, and takes the candy, and walks other lab.

~One science experiment later~

"AND WITH THIS, I WILL BE ABLE TO CUT DOWN ON THE WORLD'S SUPPLY OF BACON BY VAPORIZING A BUNCH OF PIGS AND THEN THE WORLD WILL SOON RUN OUT OF BACON! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Sei laughed, her hair now frizzed up like a pompom, wearing ridiculously large goggles and a lab coat stained with who knows what.

Everyone stared at the recording of Sei.

"So this is why the world is running out of bacon..." Doc mumbled. "Well, we've proven that when hyper, Sei thinks of ways to destroy the world. And does them."

"DARE COMPLETE!"

**Well bye! *waves and disappears into one of the many puddles on the ground***

"You're still paying for that." Kai reminded the puddle.

"Um, Kai? Wrong puddle."

"Oh." Kai looked at his feet.

"Well, up next is everyone's favorite creator! Please give a warm welcome to **Devil'sEyeAlchemist13**!" Doc grinned.

**"YOU AM BACK!" Kaede glomped Doc as Gin, Aizen and DEA walked in.**

"YES! I ARE BACK!" Doc grinned,

**"Kaede!" Aizen snapped, and Kaede came running back to his side like a dog.**

"How does he do that?" Roy wondered, clearly mystified.

**"Dude, how do you DO that?!" DEA questioned.**

**"Magic!" Gin replied.**

**"Actually, no. I promised her I'd end the bacon shortage if she behaved."**

**Aizen smirked. "I could tell her to kill herself and she'd listen at this**

**point."**

**"Please don't." Kaede begged.**

**"I'm not." Aizen messed up her hair.**

**Gin and DEA took a gigantic step back. "Who are ya an' wha' have ya done wi'**

**th' real Kaede an' Aizen?"**

**"No, that's literally what she'll do for bacon." DEA replied. "So, I have one**

**gigantic dare for everyone! That includes the other peoples who review too!"**

**She pushed Kaede forward. "HELP US RAISE MORE PIGS FOR THE SLAUGHTERHOUSE! GOGOGO!"**

"MA'AM YES MA'AM!" Everyone saluted, and started running around wildly to the pig farm. Unfortunately, Sei had already started her pig vaporization with the pig farm.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Doc fell to her knees and wailed up to the ceiling.

"Well, now that that fairly short dare is over with for us, please welcome a newcomer, **DarkForestWolf**!" Lynn said.

**HIYA GUYS! IT IS I! KENZA!**

"Hello, Kenza!" Everyone greeted.

**I run my own little FMZ dare show as well! ITS JUST SO MUCH FUN DARING THESE PEOPLE! By the way. I LOVED LASTES EPISODE! Infact, I**

**LOVED ALL YOUR EPISODES! **

"Glad that you like my work." Doc smiled, "And glad that you took the time from your busy schedule and demands that running one of theses shows takes."

"Dude, that just sounds cheesy." Kai muttered.

"Well what else am I supposed to say?" Doc demanded.

"How about 'how much sugar have you had lately?'" Kai suggested.

"Kai, we've talked about this." Doc warned.

"I know, I know, if I don't have anything nice to say, cover myself in sprinkles..." Kai sighed, and dumped a box of sprinkles on his head. Just to annoy him, Lynn sprayed whipped cream on his head, and placed a cherry on top.

"There, now it's complete!" She giggled.

**I LOVE ALL THE HOST'S TO! Especially Kia! **

"MY NAME IS NOT KIA! I THOUGHT I WENT OVER THIS!" Kai grumbled loudly.

"Kai!" Doc warned.

"Fine!" Kai growled, and poured chocolate sauce on himself.

**HE'S SO CUTE! LIKE PRIDE CUTE! **

"IM NOT CUTE EITHER!"

"Kai!"

"Alright!" Kai groaned, and started to scoop ice cream onto himself.

"Uh...what's he doing?" Havoc whispered to Breda.

"I don't know."

**The little kids are the most adorable things! *has hearts in her eyes* That Also includes, Alicia and Nina! Little kids are sooooo darn cute! *hugs all little kids* Here's some candy! *gives kids candy***

Kai, Elysia, and Nina took their candy, and Doc gave Kenza a questioning look.

**Let's say it's an early Halloween. **

"But it's not Halloween yet!" Doc protested.

"Which is why she said _early _Halloween." Lynn explained.

"Oh..."

**Also a cookie for The host's, Ed, Al, Winry, Mei, Roy, Riza, Armstrong, Olivia, Izumi, Sig, Envy, Pride, and Scar.**

"Why?" Doc asked, "Not that I'm ungrateful, just why?"

**Why? BECAUSE YOUR JUST AWSOME LIKE THAT! THAT INCLUDES EVERYBODY ELSE! FREE COOKIES FOR EVERYBODY! Except Tucker... *gives evil death glare* **

Everyone took that as a go-ahead and started to chomp down their cookies, while the children examined their candy, traded it among themselves, and ate it.

"Wait, didn't you come here do dare people?" Sei asked, no longer hyper.

**Oh! Right! DARE TIME!**

**Alphonse: I dare you to pretend Ed's not your brother for 2 episodes. And when**

**that's done, Give him this I'm sorry teddy and a brotherly hug. Yeah. I'm**

**nice. :D**

"Al! Be a good brother and get these demon children off of me!" Ed screamed fom under the blanket.

"I'm sorry, but you're not my brother." Al replied.

"WHAT?!"

**All girls: US GIRLS SHOULD HAVE MORE RESPECT! **

"YEAH!" All the ladies cheered, determined looks on their faces.

**ALL BOY'S ARE THERE SLAVES FOR THE NEXT 3 CHAPTERS! *turns on radio and "Girls Won The World" comes on by Beyonce.**

"YEAH!" The girls cheered, and the boy's jaws dropped to the floor.

"As first command, KAI, FINISH YOUR PUNISHMENT!" Doc shouted.

"Do I have to?" Kai whined.

"Yes, you are a slave. DO AS I COMMAND!"

"Fine..." Kai grumbled, and sat in a large ice cream cone.

"And for those who were wondering, when Kai's being mouthy, his punishment is to act like an ice cream cone. The plus is that I get to kick the ice cream off his face like a good sister." Doc cackled, and started to lick the ice cream and chocolate off of Kai's face.

"GROSS! SISTER SLOBBER! SOMEBODY CALL IXII!" Kai wailed, and everyone just stared, trying not to laugh. "THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL! GET HER OFF!"

**LAST DARE GOES TO... ED AND ROY!**

"Oh joy." Roy muttered, and Ed didn't hear because he's still stuck under the blanket.

"Roy, get Ed out of there." Lynn commanded. Roy frowned, but obeyed, and dragged the giggling boys back to wherever they came from.

**I dare you both to switch personalities for this chapter. **

"Well, the chapter's almost over, so that shouldn't be too hard." Ed grinned in a bad imitation of Roy. "It's almost too short for my tastes.

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE CAN'T BE SEEN THROUGH A MICROSCOPE?!" Roy demanded in an equally bad imitation of Ed, punching Ed in the face. "Wow, that felt good. I can see why you do it, Fullmetal."

"Ahem."

"Sorry, I meant, You deserved it, Colonel bastard."

**All done now! I hope you do my dares next chapter. **

"But why would I do it next chapter? They're in this one!" Doc scratches her head.

**If so DOC, YOU ROCK! HERE'S A BUCKET OF CANDY!**

***hands bucket of candy* BYE NOW! :D**

Doc looked at her bucket of candy, grinned crazily, and sped off to her room.

"And now, we are all going to die." Kai sighed.

"Quiet, slave!" Lynn hissed.

"But I have to do the next intro!"

"Do it then be quiet!"

"Jesus, woman! Alright, now for our last guest, the only guy as far as we know who reads this, **Talon Graveshadow**!"

**Hello all, what's up?**

"The Martian atmosphere."

**I just started taking martial arts classes, Tae-kwon-do specifically. I'm**

**really excited.**

At the mention of Tae-Kwon-doe, Doc sped out of her room with an empty bucket that used to hold candy, and a crazed look in her eyes.

"HeythatssocoolItakeTae-Kwon-doetooandsodoesKaiandsodoesS eiSei'sablackbeltKai'sabodon(Idontknowhowtospellit)andIstartedrecentlysoImstill awhitebeltbutCONGRATULATIONS !"

"Down girl..."

**Anyways, enough about me. On to the dares!**

**Ed, have an all out paintball war with the homunculi, with Izumi, Al, Roy, and**

**Riza on your side.**

Ed grabbed a paintball gun, loaded it, then glared at the camera. "Let's paint some stuff." He ran into the arena with his team, and the homunculi ran into the other end, everyone armed with paintball guns.

I think we all know who won.

And if anyone said the homunculi, Doc went over and smacked them silly.

**Riza, when you're done, try to hit a pineapple at 700 yards in the rain with a**

**bullet.**

"Easy." Riza scoffed, and aimed her paintball gun at the pineapple Lynn had set up, and Sei pressed a button to turn on the artificial rain.

Riza not only hit the pineapple, she also sliced it into many pieces.

**Doc, FIGHT ME! Jk, I don't want to get beaten up...**

"AwandIwassolookingforwardtoh avingarealfightagainstaworth yopponentKaidoeantcutit."

"Hey!"

"WellitstruebesidesIprobablyw ouldbeathimupitsinmympnature ."

**Kai, YOU FIGHT ME!**

"What? Really? A white belt against a bodon? (Still cant spell it...) It wouldn't be fair.

"ImawhitebeltandIbeatyouupall thetime!" Doc protested.

"Well you're bigger than me." Kai protested.

"AndsoisheNOWFIGHT!" Doc shoved Kai toward Talon.

"ALRIGHT! Geez, woman..."

***After the fight***

**Now, Kai, we'll have a more even fight. TRAIN!**

"I can't help it if I'm better at this than you! You're bigger than me, so it should be easy. The only ones here not bigger than me is Ed, Elysia, Mei, and Xiao Mei! And three of them can still beat me up! Elysia doesn't really count, since she's three..." Kai sighed, and Roy had a tic mark in his head.

"Now we train." Kai said. "Shijuh! (I can't spell Korean, so I'm going with my best guess)"

"YESSIR!" Doc responded, and slapped her hands to her sides, feet together.

"Not for you, Doc..."

"OhsorryKaireflex."

**Anyways, that's it. oh, and Envy, before I go...**

***Talon gives Envy a hug***

"WHAT?! WHAT IS THIS?!" Envy demanded, trying to get out of Talon's hug. "I DON'T DO HUGGING, MR.!WHAT IS THIS FOR?!"

**Sorry for hating on you so bad. But, since I still don't like the fact that**

**Maes died, I am now going to stab you with a knife made of butter.**

"Um... That really didn't hurt..." Envy frowned as the butter knife melted off him.

**BYE!**

"BYTTALON!" Doc waved, then looked at the camera. "Wellthishadbeenanotherfun-filledepisodeof-"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheered and ran off as "50 Ways to say Goodbye" played.

**A/N: Yes, Kai is an ice cream cone. :3 In other news, if you have pigs for the slaughterhouse, send DEA13 a PM with your donation of pigs, with the subject of "AAD3 pig donations" or some variation of that, along with your donation of pigs! So go raise some doomed piggies! And take Tae-Kwon-doe! It's really fun! You get to kick stuff!**

**PM if you have dares, review of you don't.**

**~Hyped-up Doc, Mad-scientist Sei, The-normal-one-this-time Lynn, and ice-cream-not-cute-not-Kia Kai**


	20. Girliness

**A/N: You people need to read the authors notes more! DEA13 got no pig donations! Well guess what? This is the first chapter in a while that hasn't been typed up on my iPad. Huzzah for that!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, but I do own the Netflix app that has Fullmetal Alchemist on it, and Fullmetal Alchemist volume 1-22. **

The lights flare up and Doc dances onstage. "Hello!" She greets, and does a twirl. "I'm thinking of cutting my hair. Really short. Y'know, taking my chest-length hair and chopping it to my shoulders or shorter. Thoughts? Nah, you don't care. Let's get on with it. Welcome to another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and runs onstage as "Gangnam Style" plays.

"Hello!" Sei waves. "Our first guest today is **kuttiepie3**!"

***appears in flowery and sparkly goodness holding little brothers dead tired***

"GAH! DEMON CHILDREN!" Ed jumps back and points a shaking finger at kuttiepie's brothers.

**Edward Elric I am unamused. I will now have you watch these demon spawns from hell itself for 3 episodes and boys remember what big sister told you, no mercy and if he tries to hurt you run to the nearest person, specifically the one that wields a wrench.**

"WHAT?!" Ed demanded as the children decided to jump onto him and smother him with a larger and thicker blanket. "NOOOOO!"

"Hahah! Midget shrimp is fun!" one of the boys giggled.

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT HE CAN'T BE SEEN WITH THE NAKED EYE?!" Ed demanded.

"Heheh!"

**Second dare, let my friend redesign your studio but be warned anyone who is allergic to the color pink, sparkles, and/or frills to leave the area immediately, and the rest of you, put gas masks on. We can't have you inhale too much girly cuteness, it is bad for ones health, as for me, I'm immune.**

"Well, then most of the girls should be immune as well." Lynn shrugged as kuttiepie's friend skips in with buckets of paint and large paintbrushes and tons and tons of glitter.

Not even five minutes later, the studio has turned into something from a five year old girl's dreamland.

The boys then started to bang their heads on the glittery wall to try to retain their sanity.

**Roy, I don't hate you completely, you burned the barrelez so that's one good thing you did. I think you got on my good side. Wow, quiet the achievement for the likes of you.**

Even though he's dismayed by the girliness, he nods, then goes back to banging his head on the wall.

**Kai, I must admit, ice cream really does suit you.**

"Meh."

**Well, bye-bye! *disappears in a bubble which pops splattering paint everywhere***

"FINALLY SOMETHING THAT'S NOT PINK!"

"Shush, slaves. The next guest for today is **Talon Graveshadow**." Doc grins.

**Oh, Envy, when I said 'butter' I meant gold. *Talon holds a knife made of pure gold. A soft metal, regularly, but this knife was reinforced with alchemy, and the metal was wickedly sharp* **

"Oh. It still doesn't really hurt." Envy shrugged.

"RAWR SHINY THING!" Doc shrieked and dove for the knife, which was pulled away from her grasp at the last moment. "NOOO MY SHINY THING!"

"Bad Doc!" Sei scolds, and spays Doc with a spritzer bottle.

"MEH!"

"Alright, who gave her chocolate?!" Sei demanded, and the boys turned their eyes to the floor guiltily.

**Sorry, I've been watching too much Skydoesminecraft, the man refers to gold in minecraft as butter, and i love the way he says it. **

"TO THE YOUTUBE!" Doc jumps up, forgetting the butter knife.

**Well, that is all. Oh, and before I leave, Kai, how tall are you? I'm about 5 feet 10, to 5 feet 11. And I want to know, for curiosity's sake.**

"I'm 4' 7"." Kai said. "And before you say it, I'M NOT SHORT!"

"He's like a younger Ed with short brown hair and is totally useless." Roy muttered.

"I HEARD THAT!"

"Anyway… That's it for today. This has been another episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone exits as "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" plays.

**A/N: Well, I'm busy watching Doctor Who right now, and about to start working on my TARDIS. That's right, I have a TARDIS! It's actually a big cardboard box a bit smaller than I am, but once its painted blue and everything, it'll be AWESOME! Anyway, pigs for DEA13. REMEMBER!**

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	21. Reminiscing

**A/N: Hey, this isn't actually a chapter. So if you just want dares, then don't read this. I was just thinking about this, and wanted to share it with you.**

The camera pans to Doc, who's sitting in the studio by herself, reading "The Mark of Athena." She looks up, and grins.

"Hey there. I realize that you probably don't want to hear me reminisce, but I honestly want to. So here's me, reminiscing.

"When I started this, way back on the original Ask and Dare, I was bored, and I was on my computer while my brother was watching TV. I had wanted to do one of these for a while, so I asked my brother if he wanted to co-host it with me. He said yes, but I don't really think that he was listening. So when I started typing, I texted Sei and asked her if she had any dares for me to start with. She gave me one, so I went on that and the few that Kai gave me.

"So I started, not really expecting many dares. Actually, I hoped to become one of those really popular dare stories that had a couple hundred reviews. So everyday, or whenever I felt like I had enough for a chapter, I typed it all up and posted.

"When I first started, I imagined my studio as just a house in the suburbs where everyone just kind of hung out. But soon, more people came to 'watch' my show, and it became more than that. My little dream house became a large studio full of things that I never dreamed would be there. Take the arena, or the pool, or the forest, for example. I never even knew that they were there, but here they are. I didn't even think that it would go so far as to go to the moon! Much less Mars. But still, the image that I originally had about my little house stayed with me.

"Pretty soon, I had over a hundred reviews on Ask and Dare, and I was ecstatic. I was smiling for days on end, just for that reason. But not all my reviews were friendly, and full of fun stuff for me to think over. I had also received reviews telling me to take my story down because if was against the rules for it to even be up.

"Me being me ignored them, and after a while, Ask and Dare got taken down. Pretty soon, I got frantic PMs from some of my loyal readers, asking me where Ask and Dare went, whether or not it was taken down purposely or taken down by the administration, and if I was going to continue with a sequel, which I assured them that I would.

"I continued with the reviews I hadn't gotten to, and went from there. I forget whether or not Sei asked me to keep the dare count per chapter to a reasonable level in Ask and Dare or Ask and Dare 2, but it was after Lynn joined the crew. I remember this because I did four dares per chapter, and went with that, occasionally doing less if time passed and I only had, like, two or three dares.

"The mean reviews also came back, asking me to take down the story, and sooner rather than later, Ask and Dare 2 was taken down, and again came the frantic PMs. I again assured that there would be another one, and went from what I had, but I unfortunately lost four sets of dares, which I found a while ago, but then lost again, so I'm sorry about that.

"So that leads me to Ask and Dare 3, where one persistent critic kept telling me off because there was a little bit of script format and song lyrics. I kept trying to fix those, but she kept on me, so I eventually got sick of it and took out all the lyrics.

"So that pretty much brings me to today, where I currently have 1,359 hits this story, 72 chapters spanning all three stories, 10 favorites, 7 alerts, and too many reviews for me to go back and count. So I really just wanted to take this time to say Thank you. Thank you so much for taking your time to come and read this series of weird fics that I write, and thank you for making my day whenever you send me a PM with fun things for me to think about and write over.

"I don't really have to worry about the flamers now, because I've read over the rules, taken every precaution, and used every loophole I can think of. Let me say it one more time, thank you so much." Doc finishes, and the lights go out.

**A/N: Sorry for spamming you, but I felt like it needed to be said. Thanks again, and PM me with weird things that I have to write later on. I love you all!**

**~Just Doc this time**


	22. kuttiepie3

**A/N: Fairly short this time, only because I've been updating at the wrong times. I should be updating from about 10:00 am to 3:00 pm, because that's when a majority of you people read this, or find it for the first time. Oh well. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. If I did, I would support Mustang's miniskirt harem. ITS RIGHT FOR A MAN TO DREAM! But since I don't I'm against it.**

Doc somersaults onstage, and does a little bow. "Hello, and welcome to today's episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and runs onstage as "Gangnam Style" blasts through the speakers.

"We only have one guest today, so give it up for **kuttiepie3**!" Doc announces.

***sports in giant blast of girliness making anything in its radius be put in  
princess dresses and high heels* **

The blast mostly catches the men, who look down at their frilly gowns in disgust and surprise. "WTH?!"

Riza, who's also caught in the blast, pulls out her gun, and aims it at kuttiepie. "Die." She mutters, and shoots, but Sei's automatic force field protecting the guests (installed after Riza's attacks on Dragonlover became more vicious) protects the girl.

"Sucker."

**hola no amigos how are you! Hey Ed, how you handling the little demons? I hope there being nice to you coughcough*not*coughcoughh. **

"THEY ARE WILD CHILDREN AND DESERVE TO BE LOCKED UP IN A ZOO WITH THE REST OF THEIR KIND!" Ed shouts angrily, and gets smothered with yet another blanket. "Thank god this is almost over…"

"What do you mean?"

"With the chapters as short as they are, this'll be over quickly…"

**So how you handling the sparkles anyone faint yet?**

"Yes. Armstrong did, only because he was among his own kind."**  
Well here are some dares.**

To Ed, how would you like to watch titanic, well you get to! Remember to bring  
tissues!

In the screening room, Ed was crying his eyes out during the movie.

"IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL! THEY CAN'T BE TOGETHER BUT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUUUUUUCH! WAAAAAAH!"****

Right now I am in St. Louis and they had this giant metal play set that went up  
to six stories! I went through the highest tube and it was swaying everywhere!  
Well bye bye! *disappears in a giant wave of sparkles*

"Good bye!" Everyone waved, the smaller children becoming quite jealous of the play set in St. Louis.

"Well, this has been another fairly short episode of…"

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and runs out as "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" plays.

**A/N: Goodbye for now! **

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	23. the Icee Monster

**A/N: I HAVE ENOUGH GUESTS FOR A CHAPTER! Sorta... Oh well. Cest la vi. Enjoy your crown~ **

**Rapunzel is an awesome movie. :) Anyway, in my personal news, I get to meet with the author of a book for lunch today! Yay! Ever read **_**90 Miles to Havana**_**? No? Your loss. It's a great book. I got to meet with the author for lunch with a few other student because I did my summer reading homework awesomely! Hooray for me! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Now shut up and read the story.**

The stage is utterly silent and empty for a few seconds, then the sound of faint screaming is heard. It gets louder and louder until Doc crashes on the floor. "Ow..." She mumbles, and slowly picks herself off the floor. Her gaze flits to the ceiling, where a Doc sized hole had appeared mysteriously. "I can fix that." She assures herself, and presses a button on her remote that causes a temporary force field to shimmer in existence over the hole.

"Now that that's done, allow me to welcome you to another semi-regular sized episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and rushes onstage as "Gangnam Style" blares.

"Alright!" Sei claps her hands together, "Our first guest today is from **bobby dylan**."

**Riza I dare you to sing "The Seeker" by The Who.**

Riza clears her throat as Lynn starts the music. She starts to sing, and all the guys are staring at her, because they never expected her to have such a good voice.

When she finishes, she receives an enthusiastic applause.

"And our next guest today is... still **bobby dylan**." Lynn reads.

**I ask Riza: is it true that you are the biggest topic on the**

**newspaper The Daily Prophet?**

"No." Riza states. "It's a wizarding newspaper, and I am obviously not magical."

"Not true!" Lynn points out, and holds up a copy of today's issue of The Daily Prophet, which had a picture of Riza sprawling the front cover. "Riza Hawkeye: Most Famous Military Witch" She read. "Wow, Riza, this whole article is about you! And wow, I never knew that your forte at Hogwarts was Herbology. Didn't think you were the type."

"What house was she in?"

"She was a Hufflepuff." Lynn replied.

"Give me that!" Riza exclaimed, and ripped the newspaper out of Lynn's grasp, then ripped the newspaper to shreds. "IT'S LIES, I TELL YOU, ALL LIES!"

"Okay... The next guest today is **Talon Graveshadow**." Kai says happily.

**Talon sneaks in, like the sneaky ninja he is, and appears beside Ed.**

"GAH!"

**Shh... I'm grounded form computer 'till midterms roll around... supposed to**

**be doing homework right now...**

"Ooh. That's not fun. I had to do that last year because I failed a few tests." Doc says. "Procrastination is fun, but it'll also keep you up until 1 am doing your homework..."

**Anyhoof, I have dares!**

"YAY!"

**Kai, attempt to fight a giant Icee monster.**

In an attempt to make the ordeal more dramatic, Sei grabs Doc's remote and presses a few buttons that creates a Lord of the Rings type of setting, complete with a new outfit for everyone. Kai's was the most lavish, since he's the hero in this dare.

The female hosts are wearing basically the same outfit, a tunic and trousers, just in different colors. Kai is wearing a suit of armor with a red billowy cape.

Everyone else is in peasant clothes, except for Ed, who is the king of the land for now.

All of a sudden, A GIANT ICEE MONSTER APPEARS OUT OF NO WHERE AND GRABS DOC AND RUNS AWAY TO A GIANT HILL LAUGHING A GARGY LAUGH THAT SOUNDS LIKE A MELTED ICEE SLOOSHING IN A CUP!

"DON'T WORRY, SIS! ILL SAVE YOU!" Kai grabs his sword thing from his waist, and runs comically after the giant Icee monster. When he finally catches up with the monster, Kai drives his sword into the monster's leg, but it passes through the monster's leg. "WHAT IS THIS WITCHCRAFT?!"

"YOU'RE AN IDIOT!" Doc calls down. "GO FOR THE ICE!"

"I AM!"

"YOURE STILL AN IDIOT! GO FOR THE ICE!"

"... Oh." Kai finally realizes that stabbing it won't work, so he tries a different approach. He take a hair dryer out of his back pocket thing, and aims it at the monster. "Time to melt the monster!" He roars, and turns on the hair dryer. Unfortunately, it's really slow, so the monster isn't at all affected. Instead of melting, the giant monster Flicked him away.

"My hero." Doc mutters.

"IM BACK AGAIN!" Kai called, and ran back with a huge heat lamp, which he aims at the monster, and turns on.

Needless to say, it's more effective than the hair dryer.

KAI WINS!

**Ed, have some lactose-intolerant milk. **

"Meh." Ed grunts, and takes a sip of the milk. "Hm, still tastes like milk."

"Have some more respect, Ed!"

"I don wanna!"

**Doc... *Claps hands together dramatically, and on wall opens up slowly, steam**

**floating out of it to reveal a massive stage, with strobe lights, massive**

**speakers, and a giant plasma screen Tv behind it.***

"Cooool." Doc breathes.

**DANCE OFF! EVERYBODY NOW! EVERY SONG FROM GANGNAM STYLE TO THE FMA THEME SONGS! LETS GO!**

And everyone started to dance. After every single song was played, only Doc and Sei were left, still full of energy while everyone else had collapsed in the floor, exhausted.

"HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT?!"

"We feed off of each other's energy." Sei replies as if it was the most obvious thing n the world.

"The last guest for today is a person whom we haven't heard from in a while! Give it up for **EeveeAlchemist**!" Doc cheers.

***Appears in a bright flash of blue light, kneeling with her eyes narrowed***

"Uh oh..." Somebody mumbled.

**I'm thoroughly pissed off today, so that means bad Juju for all of you.**

**Especially Envy *glares***

"Who, me?" Envy asked, turning into a palm tree, "I'm not Envy, I just a palm tree."

"Dude, that doesn't actually work."

**First. Military, Including Ed (And Al if he so wishes): Tie Envy to a tree and**

**get back at him for all the evilness he does in the series by doing something**

**extremely annoying and/or violent. Whatever that is, its your decision.**

The while military shot evil grins at Envy, and grabbed the palm tree, and tied it to a palm tree.

A short while later, Envy had been traumatized. There was fire. Lots and lots of fire. :)

**Next, Pipsqueak (Aka Ed): *Pulls out an equivalent to a lake full of milk***

**You. Drink. Now. In the course of three chapters, you will drink all of this.**

**Or I will come back and punish you severely.. You have been warned.**

"I DON'T WANNA!" Ed whined.

"SHADDUP! DRINK!" Winry commanded, wielding her wrench.

"FINE! But only a little bit." Ed leans down to take a sip, and Roy pushed Ed in, forcing him to swallow about a gallon or two of milk.

"Heheh."

**Enough for now. Before I get too mad and start doing bad things... *Disappears**

**with a nod to Doc and Kai***

"Later." Doc waves, then faces the camera. "Well, this has been another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheered and rushed off the stage as "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" plays.

**A/N: "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" always reminds me of a Flamenco dancer dancing with a cowboy. How could it not? Anyway, this is random, but if there's something weird you want Kai to do, ask! He'll do it, willingly or not. :)**

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't. **

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	24. Iiiiincompletion time COME ON!

**A/N: You do know that I like long dares right? It's been so long since I had long dare. Not that I mind, since it's all the more easier to write a short dare during school. Anyway, let's get on with the dares, shall we?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. If I did, Envy would have a definite gender.**

To try something new for the day, Doc walks in. "Hello! Anyway, let's start. Welcome to today's episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and rushes on as "Gangnam Style" blares.

Kai pushes his way through the crowd. "Our first guest is **bobby dylan**."

**I ask Riza why do those two brothers want to use the philosophers**

**stone to resurrect their mother when it is actually used to achieve**

**immortality?**

Riza rolls her eyes. "Immortality is one aspect of the Philosopher's stone. I can't pretend to fully understand it, since I'm not an alchemist, but as far as I know, the stone allows you to do the impossible with alchemy, like turning plants into minerals, and making a large amount of objects with only a little. They don't want the stone to bring back their mother, Ed and Al want the stone so that they can use its powers to get their bodies back." He takes a breath, "It's like you haven't even read the books."

"Now, Riza, don't be disrespectful to the guests." Roy wags his finger.

**I ask Riza what inspired you to be in a anime book because don't**

**you think THERE IS TO MUCH ANIME?**

"This guy asks Riza a bunch of questions." Havoc sighs, and lights a cigarette.

"Now, Jean, what have we talked about?" Lynn asks.

"Sorry." Havoc stamps his cigarette out on the bottom of his shoe.

"Well, I didn't really ask to be in it. It just sort of happened." Riza shrugged. "I don't think there's too much anime, though, Because it's all mostly manga."

**I dare Riza to kiss the person that she most hates.**

Riza sighs, and grabs Lust, and kisses her. Riza quickly pulls away, and sulks. Lust fingers her lips and smirks. "Not half bad."

Meanwhile, Roy has gone and joined the inhabitants of the emo corner.

**I ask Riza do you know pewdiepie.**

"I don't know pewdiepie personally, but I have watched half of one of his videos." Riza says, coming out of sulking.

**I** **ask Riza do you know tobuscus.**

"Again, I don't know hi personally, but I have seen a bunch of his videos." Riza explains, sending a glare to Doc, who whistles innocently.

**I ask Riza on a scale of 1 to 10 how sad was Dumbledore's death?**

"2." Riza says automatically.

"WHAT?!" Sei demands, glaring at Riza.

"It wasn't that sad. After going through a war, nothing is sad anymore. Not even Roy's lame attempts to flirt with me." Riza explains to the dark haired girl.

**I ask Riza on infamous and infamous 2 positive karma or negative**

**karma.**

"Um, what?"

**I ask Riza do you know nova?**

"Who?"

"The superhero." Doc says.

"Again, who?"

"Captain Bucket Head!"

"Oh. No."

**I ask Riza Ed told me you like running around your room naked while singing "Friday" by Rebecca Black.**

"Lies." Riza stated. "Ed must've been looking into Roy's room."

"Denial's not just a river in Utah~" Doc sang.

"Egypt!" Sei corrects.

"I knew that."

**I ask Riza do you know classic gamer room hd?**

"What's that?" Roy asks.

"Anyway," Doc interrupts, "our next guest is **Dragonlover71491**." She says.

**(Chibi black dragon poofs onto Roy's head.) Hey guys, I'm back! Work's been crazy, so I've had a hard time keeping up. But now I'm back! And Kai, I work 40 hours a week, so no, can't clean your room buddy. Besides, it probably looks like a tornado went through, am I right?**

While Roy's trying to get the dragon out of his hair, Kai shakes his head. "Not really. I just wanted to know just in case."

**(Flies over to Doc, landing on her shoulder) Any who, let's have some fun! To start, let's shove Roy into a closet with Armstrong, who's to tell him all about his family's line. Be sure to put a strong lock on.**

"Yay!" Doc cheers, and shoves Roy and Armstrong into a closet.

"NOOOOOOOO!" Roy wails, as Armstrong starts to tell her about the glory of the Armstrong family.

**Next, let's put Ed in a kitten suit and let Al have some fun with him. And Ed, you have to play along, he is your little brother after all.**

"I hate this." Ed grumbles, and pulls on a kitty suit for Al.

"Kitty!" The smaller boy cheers, and hugs Ed.

"I'll get you for this." Ed promises, before acting like a cat. "Meow."

**Now let's some fun with tiny miniskirts! Guess who gets to wear it this time...all of the hosts! Don't worry, it's only for 10 minutes.**

"WHAT?!" They demand, as miniskirts appear on the hosts. Kai makes a duck face and flashes a peace sign, while Sei is trying to hold in her rage.

"I would be angry with this if I didn't feel so pretty." Doc states.

"I kinda like it." Lynn nods.

**Let's keep the ball rolling with this next ingenious dare: Alphonse has to let me into his armor and just pretty much let me mess around in there.**

"Sure!" Al hands over his old armor.

**(Dives into Al's metal body) It's dark in here, good thing I can breathe fire. (Light shines out of all the holes in Al's armor.) Let's see; we some dry cat food, old cans of tuna, a few balls of yarn, a couple of fish bones...and is this a litterbox, Al? (Sticks head out of Al's neck) This boy has a kitty obsession, not that that's new...but I did find this too. (Holds up piece of paper) It says, "call me anytime you want to play, Love Mei," well what do you think of that Ed?**

"I don't care as long as he knows what he's getting into." Ed shrugs, and was knocked down yet again by the demon children with the blanket. "I THOUGHT THEY LEFT!"

"They did, but I felt that this was necessary." Sei smirks.

**(Lands on Kai's head.) Okay, I've had my fun. Doc, thanks for the barrier, Riza can get pretty nasty. Though I can't blame her, I think I shed a few scales when I napped on her head last time. Sorry about that.**

"Meh." Riza glares, and Doc just pats her head.

"Now,now, Riza, what have we talked about?"

"Nothing."

"Well we'll be talking about it soon."

**(Lands on Roy's head again) Hmm...Roy's hair is pretty soft, maybe I should nap here? NAH! Better idea! (Set's Roy's hair on fire, cackling all the while!) Now he's a real hothead! Bye everyone! (Poofs out of sight!)**

"... AAAAAAAAAGH!" Roy shrieks, and starts running around like an idiot.

"DON'T WORRY, I'LL SAVE YOU!" Kai calls, and throws a vase of water onto Roy.

"AAAAAAAAAGH!" Roy screams from the cold water. "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!"

"The fridge." Kai jerks his thumb to the fridge standing behind him.

"... Oh."

"Our next guest is... **bobby dylan**." Lynn sweatdrops.

**I ask riza do you know pewdiepie and tobuscus**

"Asked and answered."

**I ask riza on infamous 1 and 2 positive karma or negative karma**

"Again, what?"

**I ask riza do you like justin bieber if you hate him then I LOVE YOU if you like him then (chuckles evilly) i wont be the only one with a scar**

**on my eye**

"Hey!" Scar protests.

"... Is that supposed to be a threat?" Riza asks dangerously. "And no, I don't like him. I think that he's a sellout, and that he just another cliched singer."

"YOU MEAN JUSTINA BIEBER!" Doc shouts out in protest, "SHE'S A GIRL, GET IT RIGHT!"

**I ask riza i am having problems with by lightning power any advice would be great**

"Sorry, I don't know much about it. If you want to ask anyone, ask your electrician."

**I ask riza what is the matrix**

"I thought that I already stated that I have no idea what the matrix is." Riza huffs.

**I ask riza prepare**

"What?"

**I ask riza for**

"Huh?"

**I** **ask riza the**

"Qué?"

**I ask riza best**

"Um, what?"

**I ask riza question**

"I don't even... What?" Riza looks very confused. "I can't answer your questions if you don't complete them."

**I ask riza do you like the song trololololololololololololol olololololololololololololol olololololololololololololol olololololol**

"There we go. Now was that so hard? And no, I've never heard of it, so I don't like it."

"I'm just going to mime out what I was feeling while reading all bobby dylan's dares. Especially the incomplete ones." Doc said, then banged her head on her keyboard multiple times. "Ow... No offense, but please dude, put all your dares in one place, and for the love of god, complete your sentences!" Doc rubs her forehead.

"Oookay..." Sei pushes Doc to the fridge where she can ice the letters and keys off her forehead. "Our last guest today is **Talon Graveshadow**!"

**I'm going to try and give the most dares I have ever given in one review.**

"Good for you!" Sei gave a thumbs up.

**ONE! Ed, have a dance off with Greed.**

"Done!" Sei snapped her fingers and Lynn turned on the music. The song in question was LMFAO's "Sexy and I Know it."

Greed won.

**TWO! Mustang, I would enjoy it if you would dress up in a pink fairy outfit, run into the nearest camp of hostile people, and say "I AM ROY FRICKING MUSTANG AND I CAN WHOOOP YOUR SORRY BEHINDS EVEN IF I AM IN A FAIRY COSTUME!"**

Roy put on the fairy costume and ran into Doc's room. "I AM ROY FRICKING MUSTANG AND I CAN WHOOP YOUR SORRY BEHINDS EVEN IF I AM IN A FAIRY COSTUME!" He shouted, and after a lot of screaming, Roy limped out of Doc's room.

"Apparently I can't whoop her sorry behind even if I am in a fairy costume..." He mumbled.

**THREE! Al, you and Doc have to have an arm wrestling competition on a greased table in the middle of summer.**

"IT'S ON!" Doc shouted, jumping out of her room to the greased/summery table. She placed her arm on the table, and gestured for Al to place his hand on as well.

"One, two, three, go!" Lynn said, and the contest began.

Al won.

"SHUT UP! I can't help it f I suck at arm wrestling!" Doc protested.

**CUATRO! Alex A. you have to get into a staring contest with a Basilisk from Harry Potter, Medusa, and Justin Bieber all at the same time...and WIN.**

Armstrong gave all mentioned offenders an evil glare. They ran off screaming.

**FIVE! Kai, you have to out-eat Gluttony in an Icee slurping contest!**

"ICEEEEEEEEEES!" Kai squeed, and ran over to the table where the mega Icees were waiting.

"One, two, three, go!" Lynn said, waving a checkered flag. While Gluttony merely just ate the whole thing in about 3.2 seconds, Kai slurped it down in 2.5. Then had a splitting brainfreeze.

"AAAAAAH! BRAIN FREEEEEEZE!"

**SIX! Rose, eat a pound of rose petals marinated in dandelion paste while drinking cactus juice.**

"... Why?" Rose asked.

"Just do it, Mary!" Sei said, and flung the pound of rose petals marinated in dandelion paste and the cup of cactus juice at Rose.

Rose quickly prepared her meal on a table, and quickly ate.

"... Interesting." She said thoughtfully.

"Good, considering you're eating your cousins." Doc smirked.

"WHAT?! ROSIE II, DANDY, CACTUS?! AAAAAGH!" Rose panicked, and promptly fainted.

"She's such a Sue..."

**SEVEN! Me! Kick the nearest person in the face!**

Envy spent the next few minutes rubbing the boot shaped indent on his face.

**EIGHT! I got nothing... Oh wait! Of course I do! Because now I get to watch Father (Mother), Envy, That one dude, you know, with the thing, at that one place, in that one place... YOU KNOW WHO I MEAN! and Hohenheim do a Russian style dance on top of the Eiffel Tower which has been temporarily placed in the studio!**

Mother, Envy, that guy with the face, and Hohenheim stood on top of the Eiffel Tower, and did their Russian dance.

"ZAT EEZ A DISGRACE!" A random French person screamed, and threw a baguette at the foursome.

"OUI! ZEES 'ORRIBLE EXCUSE FOR DANCING MUST BE STOPPED!" Another random Frenchie shouted, and threw a croissant. And so all the random Frenchies began to throw pastries at the four to stop the Russian dancing.

**NINE! PIE FIGHT!**

"PIE FIGHT!" Kai shouted gleefully, and scooped up a blueberry pie and hurled it at his sister, who quickly retaliated with a Coconut Cream pie. Soon, people were chucking cherry pie cherry bombs, apprehended apple pie ammunition, and ransacking with rhubarb pie revolvers.

'twas very much fun.

**TEN! That, is it folks. I'm out. Oh, and before I go, Al, KITTEN SHOWER!**

Al was showered with a cluster of kittens as Doc took her place center stage.

"Well, this was another fun episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheered and ran out at "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" played.

**A/N: Sorry it took so long, I was camping with my dad. I got to hit him with a foam stick. :3 **

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	25. Anti-Riza, Mini-Doc, and Comrade Al

**A/N: Halloween is almost here and I'm excited. But even sooner than Halloween is my Homecoming Dance next Friday, and my haircut today! I'm going from chest-length to shoulder-length. :3 **

**But enough about me, let's get onto what you people came for. DARE TIME! Just a warning, next chapter shall be genderbent, so prepare your dates for that! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. But I do own many Oxford shirts! (only 6...)**

The studio lights flared up, but Doc was nowhere is sight.

"IM DOWN HERE!" A high-pitched voice called out. The camera looks down, and sees a mini Doc waiting on the floor. "And before you ask how this happened, I took a trip to Wonderland and drank the juice and ate the cookie. I couldn't resist! Anyway, welcome to another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheers and runs on, while mini-Doc runs around avoiding everyone's feet and "Gangnam Style" plays.

"Ahem, our first guest today is **Dragonlover71491**. Did I get that right? I keep forgetting the order of the numbers." mini-Doc says.

"Aw, you're so cute~" Kai coos, lifting mini-Doc up by the back of her shirt.

"HEY! PUT ME DOWN!" Mini-Doc shrieks, having a tiny temper tantrum.

"Aw, even her temper tantrums are cute~" Kai giggles, and wiggles his fingers in front of his sister. "Who,s a cute little Doc, you are, you are- OW!" Kai pulled his fingers away. "Why'd you bite me?"

"Because you're an idiot! Can we get on with the dares now?" Mini-Doc humphed, and sat down in the palm of Kai's hand.

**(Poofs onto Lynn's head) Hi again, and Roy, here, this is for you. (Tosses Roy**

**a blue bottle.) **

"What's this?" Roy asked skeptically.

**It's a special hair tonic, guaranteed to grow back your hair, fuller, shinier, and healthier than ever. Perhaps this makes up for me setting your head on fire? (Gives Roy big chibi eyes.)**

Roy held a stoic expression, but eventually cracked. "Alright, I'll give it a go." He promised.

**Anyway, let's get to the real fun! Now...to start, Kai, do you still have the**

**opposite gun I gave you? **

"Yup!" Kai grinned.

**If you still do, let's use it on Riza, shall we?**

"Sure thing!" Kai used his free hand to get his opposite gun, and quickly fired a shot at Riza.

When the light died down, Riza stood there with her hair down, with _makeup _on, wearing a miniskirt and a crop top with knee high leather boots.

"Like, what are you all, like, staring at? Do I, like, have salad, like, stuck in my teeth or, like, whatever?" Riza asked in a dumb blonde voice.

"... IT'S BEAUTIFUL!" Roy exclaimed, crying anime tears of joy before glomming the new Riza. "Hey gorgeous~"

"Like, no. I'm like, way too pretty for, like, a loser like you." Riza scoffed, turning her nose into the air.

"Oh, burn!" Ed chuckled.

Roy went to spend a few hours in the emo corner.

**(Laughs evilly before hiding behind Lynn's head.) Don't let Riza get me, I'm**

**too cute to die.**

"Like, what's a, like, dragon doing, like, here? I, like, want one!" Riza exclaimed, then pulled out a phone. "Like, daddy, can you, like, get me a dragon? Like, what do you mean they, like, don't exist?! I, like, _want _one! And I, like, want one _now_!"

"... This is bad."

**Next, let's force Roy into a room full of hardcore yaoi fans for an hour. Good**

**luck flameboy :)**

Sei took the liberty of chucking Roy into the yaoi Fangirl room.

He came out an hour later mostly naked with a terrified look on his face.

**Moving on, let's tie up Ling and beat him like a piñata, literally! Please**

**keep Lan Fan away from me! She gonna kill me for this, though she has to do it**

**too.**

"Consider it done!" Mini-Doc squeaked, and hopped off of Kai's hand over to where her remote, even though it was twice the size of her, lay. She grabbed the end and spun it so that it faced Lan Fan. After some difficulty, mini-Doc managed to get on top of the remote and jump on a button, firing a laser cage at the ninja.

"Go ahead!" Mini-Doc turned to the other hosts, who grabbed Ling, tied him up, and threw him to the ceiling, where a pterodactyl snatched Ling and held him suspended over everyone.

After going through about half a dozen baseball bats and metal poles, and a plastic sword in mini-Doc's case, they found that Ling doesn't have candy in him. Just blood and organs.

**And finally, let's use Doc's pony gun on...Olivia Armstrong! I better fly**

**before she tries to kill me too! (Poofs out of sight)**

Lynn took Doc's pony gun from a hook on the wall, and fired it at Olivier. Standing in the Major General's place was an ice blue earth pony with platinum blonde mane and tail, and two crossed ice swords for a cutie mark.

Olivier took a second to look at herself, then screamed. "AAAAAAAH! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME?!" She demanded.

"Turned you into a pony. Duh." Lynn shrugged, twirling the gun in her fingers before placing it back on the wall with all the other fun guns and stuff that the hosts collected. Oddly enough, the wall was right next to the room where they kept all their pets. Including Toothless and Sparky. "Our next guest today is **bobby dylan**."

**i ask riza do you know cole macgrath and nathen drake**

"Like, who?"

**i ask riza do you know popeye**

"You mean, like, that, like, loser dude who, like, eats nothing but, like, spinach all day? I, like, don't know who you're, like, talking about."

**i ask riza do you know flippy cat**

"Like, OMG, I, like, _love_ flippy cat!"

**i ask riza do you like fart cracks**

"Like, ew! Farts are, like, gross!"

"Anyway, our final guest for the day is **DarkForestWolf**." Sei said.

**HIYA GUYS! I'M BACK! *evil thunder comes out of no ware again and laughs like crazy for a few seconds then everything disappears in an instant***

"Great!" Mini-Doc squeaked, "Do you mind PMing me your dares though? I go through a bunch of loopholes to keep this thing up!"

**It is I! KENZA! I BROUGHT COOKIES! *hands everybody cookies* That includes the cute kids! *gives kai, nina, pride, and Alicia a special smiley faced cookie* YOU GUYS ARE JUST TO CUTE! **

"I forgive you." Mini-Doc grinned, and managed to get onto Sei's shoulder with a large cookie. "I think I like being tiny~"

"IM NOT CUTE!" Kai shrieked. "But that doesn't mean I don't want the cookie."

"COOKIES!" Nina, Elysia, and Selim squealed.

***gives big hug* And now, ON WITH THE DARES!**

**Edward: It's almost Halloween, see what happens when you scare your little brother with this freaky clown mask. *hands clown mask* Your also gonna want to use this...* a protective helmet* I remember Mei scaring Al in Xing...didn't turn out to well...*looks scared* never scare Al...*gulps* NEXT DARE!**

With the freaky clown mask over the protective helmet, Ed snuck up on Al, tapped his shoulder, and when Al turned around, Ed shouted out 'BOO!'

Al screamed, and punched Ed in the face.

"Ow!"

**Ed, Roy, Al, Envy, and Kai have to tell everybody there deepest darkest secret. But Kai doesn't have to because he's awesome like that. By the way Kai. *almost in tears* I'M SO SORRY I GOT YOUR NAME WRONG LAST TIME! PLEASE PLEASE FORGIVE ME! *gets down on knees and starts crying* I'M SO SORRY! *cries for 5 min then stops* Ok...*sniff* I'm done... **

"Well, you gave me a cookie and a dare pass, so I almost forgive you. But you still called me cute. I'm not cute!"

"Whatever!" Lynn groaned, and shoved Ed, Roy, Al, and Envy into the confession booths.

_"Um, so I can't get out of here until I say my deepest darkest secret?" _Ed asked, his face appearing on the screen above everyone. _"Damn. Well, I guess my deepest darkest secret would be... Um... I secretly love cats. They hate me, but they're adorable."_

"I KNEW IT!" Someone exclaimed, then the screen fizzed over to Roy.

_"Deepest secret, huh? I guess it's that I... Well... I don't actually like thighs, I like butts! Great big booties!"_

"Lame." Sei sighed, and the screen fizzed to Al.

_"Um, I don't really have any secrets, but I guess my worst one is that I'm secretly communist. The system works! Mostly..."_

"... That's his biggest secret? He's communist? Huh. Alert the government!" Kai said, munching his cookie when the screen fizzed over to Envy.

_"Deepest secret, huh? I guess that it's that I'm gay."_

"We all knew that!" Mini-Doc grumbled, halfway through her cookie.

**LAST DARE!**

**I dare all the girls and boy's to dress there best...I don't know why...I just felt like it...JUST DO THE STUPID DARE OK! **

"Yay! I get to put Doc in doll clothes!" Sei giggled.

"What? No!" Mini-Doc's eyes widened as Sei lifted mini-Doc up and handed her to Mei, Nina, and Elysia.

"Here you go, girls, dress Doc up in some of your pretty dolly dresses!" Sei encouraged. The three girls nodded happily and took mini-Doc and ran over to their play area.

"I HATE YOU!" Mini-Doc roared.

When everyone finished changing into their best clothes, the three girls brought mini-Doc back. Sei held back a laugh when she saw that Doc was in a princess dress complete with makeup and little shoes.

"I freaking hate you." Mini-Doc grumbled.

Sei was wearing black pants and a nice blue shirt, Kai was in khakis and a polo shirt, Lynn had a nice shirt and skirt, Ed didnt change, Al wore a nice suit, Roy had a suit, Riza was wearing extremely skimpy wear, etc.

Basically the dudes has suits, and the girls had on dresses, skirts, pants, or something else.

**Anyway's THANKS FOR DOING MY DARE! **

"You're welcome." Kai snickered, taking a picture of his sister.

"STILL HATE YOU!"

***snickers* By the way...I liked Ed in a cat suit...It was funny... If Ed doesn't want to dress up he has to wear the kitty suit! **

"I REFUSE!" Ed shouted, and ran away, right into the Sue pit.

"Oh, the irony..."

**Because I love cats, and Alphonse is your brother. I bet you love to make him smile. WHO DOESN'T LIKE TO SEE AL SMILE! HE'S JUST TO INNOCENT! **

"He's also a commie." Kai reminded.

**Every time he smiles I swear it brightens my day! Yes. Al is one of my favorite characters. So here Al! *hands Al worlds cutest cat. Every person that has owned it has died from its cuteness* Lets see if Al can survive its cuteness... *evil smirks* BYE! SEE YOU GUYS AGAIN SOON! :D**

"I think I can survive." Al shrugged. "Come, comrade, let us go discuss stuff, da?"

"... This is weird." Lynn frowned.

"Sei-chan!" Elysia exclaimed, "Can we play with Doc some more? We have more pretty outfits for her!" She and her friends giggled.

"Go ahead." Sei grinned. "Take plenty of pictures."

"I HATE-A YOU SO MUCH-A!" Mini-Doc shouted.

"Have fun, Romano~" Sei grinned, waving. "Well, this has been another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted, and ran off as "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" played.

**A/N: Anyone get the Hetalia reference? Remember, next episode is GENDERBENT! So modify your reviews so they fit!**

**Doc- Doc**

**Sei- Sei**

**Lynn- Lionel**

**Kai- Kia (cuz I'm evil~)**

**Roy: Rebecca**

**Riza: Richard, Rick, Ricky, etc.**

**Ed- Emily, Em**

**Al- Ali**

**You get it. **

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	26. Genderbending

**A/N: Heheh, sorry about the wait. I forgot to do someone's dares, so I had to find it. IM SO SORRY ANIME! Oh yeah, and reviewers are genderbent too!**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own FMA.**

When the lights flare up, Doc is already sitting in front of the camera, gazing at it intently. She had already activated the genderbending spell, because Doc was a dude.

"Hey!" He waved, and stood up. "You know, I like this look. I don't have to worry so much about my hair, I'm taller, stronger, and definitely better looking."

"GET ON WITH IT!" Someone shouted from offstage.

"I AM! Sheesh, little sisters... Anyway, welcome to today's episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted, and ran out as their genderbent selves.

"First today is the awesome **animelover102**!" Doc exclaimed.

**"Hello world and all who inhabit it!"**

**"Stop quoting Spongebob." Lucas said.**

**"I LOVE SPONGEBOB!" *sees envy laughing* "NOBODY LAUGHING ABOUT SPONGEBOB!" *body slams envy***

"Oof!" Envy groans, then Kia notices something.

"Heeey, you didn't get genderbent!" She exclaimed.

"I have no gender to begin with." Envy deadpanned.

**"Where did you learn who to do that?" said a surprised Lucas**

**"Well since I get annoyed easily I learned how to beat up people. :3"**

**"Ok..." *whispers* "He's crazy people." Lucas said**

**"Anyway I finally have MINECRAFT AND I LOVE THIS GAME AND YES GIRLS PLAY MINECRAFT TOO."**

**"YEAH WE DO.." Lucas said while playing minecraft**

"Yeah we do!" Kia fist pumped. "Oh wait, I'm a dude... And you're a dude!"

"No you're not." Sei reminded her, and handed the girl a mirror.

Kia looked at herself. "WHOA! I have a CHEST!"

"Yes you do..." Lionel sweatdropped.

**"Anyway, these dares are from Lucas since I cant think of anything."**

**"Alright I'm going to choose my first victim now- I mean person." Lucas said.**

**Ali- can you come to Anime's house and a tell his sisters to stop being mean and annoying**

"Um, okay." Ali nodded, and teleported to Anime's house. She came back seconds later with a triumphant grin. "Done."

**Rebecca- you're getting more less annoying**

"Hm. That doesn't seem to make any sense."

**Envy- *holds gun up his head* don't make fun of Spongebob**

"Dude, he's just a sponge."

"DON'T SAY THAT!"

**"I JUST THOUGHT OF A DARE!"**

**"DAMMIT YOU SCARED ME!" said a very scared Lucas**

**"Sorry, anyway William I bet Lucas can dodge one of your wrenches."**

Will looked at his prized wrench then at Lucas. "Hm... Okay." Will shrugged and chucked the wrench at Lucas.

**"Yeah, watch." *sees wrench* "Hmm." *dodges it easily* "Told ya :D" Lucas said.**

**"NEW RECORD" *MUSIC STARTS PLAYING AND CONFETTI STARTS FLYING***

**"Thank you, thank you." Lucas said while bowing down.**

**Anyway, this is a dare for everyone.**

**everyone-BEAT UP TUCKER :3**

All heads turned to the wiry woman. "Gladly."

Sheila Tucker did not live to see the light of day.

**"Can I kill her after she gets beat up?" Lucas said.**

"Um, oops?" Envy offered.

**"Sure, but wait: I have to say this. Anyway, since I can't think of dares at the end of my dares, I'll hold a contest."**

"Yay!"

**"Today's contest is who can guess Anime's fav singer." Lucas said.**

**"And its a hard one, so until someone guesses the name I'll start another contest."**

**"The winner will get the next prizes." Lucy said.**

***a stage appears and crates open up***

**"The winner will get an iPod, iPad, laptop, xbox kinect, mp3 player, flat screen tv, etc."**

"... MINE!" Kia shouted, and started to rattle off names. "Train, Justin Beiber, Karmin, Shakira, Carrie Underwood, Owl City, Carly Rae Jepson, Ke$ha, P!nk, Stevie Wonder, Katy Perry, Chameleon Circuit, Billy Joel, Adele, Kiss, Eminem, Taylor Swift, Rodney Atkins, Snoop Dog, Big Time Rush, One Direction, Brad Paisley, Kelly Clarkson, um, pasta..."

"That's enough, Kia."

**"Ok, well now were leaving. Bye guys! :3"**

"Well, up next is **Dragonlover71491**." Kia grumbled, disappointed that she ran out of names to rattle off.

**"Hey!"**

**(Doc looks around, hearing a tiny voice) "Anyone else hear that?"**

**"I'm over here!"**

**(Doc turns his head to the left, coming face to face with a really tiny black dragon, only about 2 1/2 inches long.)**

**"DL?" Doc inquires as he holds out his hand.**

**(Dragon lands in Doc's open palm) Yup, it's me...don't ask me how I got teeny. Let's just say that it involved a little accident in my lab. So how's Rebecca? Still upset that the anti-Rich didn't like her? Not that I blame her, I regret doing that dare. (Shudders cutely)**

Rebecca sobbed. "WHY DID ANTI-RICH HAVE TO BE GAY?!"

"Man up, you pansy." Sei sighed.

"Last I checked, I wasn't a flower." Rebecca quipped.

**Moving on, let's start by using the opposite gun on Rebecca this time, but we better change her back if it turns out to be scary...or too much for Rick to handle! One of the two.**

Doc used the opposite gun on Rebecca, who transformed into, well, it's hard to explain. Rick gaped at his superior.

"Ma'am... You're... Uh..."

"Blonde. Very blonde." Sei supplied.

"And goth." Kia noted.

"A blonde goth? That's weird..."

**Next, let's see who can catch me! First one to grab me, without hurting me mind you, gets a mountain of super double chocolate chip cookies, and we're talking a mountain the size of MT. Fuji here. Good luck.**

"... COOKIES!" Kia exclaimed, and started to chase DL.

"Some things never change." Doc sighed,

**Now let's make Eick wear a catwoman costume! And I mean Halle Berry catwoman! Don't shoot me! (Hides in Doc's hair)**

"... This is going to be very weird..." Doc frowned.

After Rick got changed, which he was forced to do after threats of the Sue pit, he came out wearing a leather bodysuit that didn't hide anything.

"... The vital regions... THEY BURN!" Kia wailed.

"Nice abs." Jeanne noticed.

"JEANNE!" Lionel exclaimed.

"Sorry."

**Now let's finish things up with everybody re-enacting the Thriller music video, have fun now!**

"I DIBS BENG MJ!" Doc shouted.

"No way. I have the 'fro." Sei protested, flipping his hair.

"... Darn you, Sei." Doc grumbled.

After all preparations were made, the dance went off without a hitch. Sei had fun being MJ, Kia ran for her life, and Doc was a pretty convincing zombie. Lionel was too, and so was everyone else.

**(Flutters in midair in front of everybody) Well, I better go. I need to figure out how to reverse this. Bye! (Tries to fly away, but is grabbed by Kia)**

**"ACH! Let me go!" Demands the tiny dragon!**

"No way, I want to keep you! And I want my cookies!"

**(Wiggles free, flying away, wings beating like a hummingbird's) Sorry, gotta go! (Flies past Doc's head, out of sight)**

"My cookies..." Kia groaned.

"The next guest today is **bobby dylan**. Or barbara dylan... Eh, whatevs." Sei shrugged.

I** ask Rick why the long face why be so emo why be so sad why not**

**care about others as Johan the 5th said being sad will get thou no where being**

**dark will only shadow the person of thous former self.**

"I'm not emo. I just take things seriously." Rick said, keeping his composure.

"But underneath that uniform is a sexy person!" Hilary Breda said. "I think..."

"Have him take his shirt off!" Jeanne said.

"Off! Off! Off! Off! Off! Off!" Everyone chanted until Rick sighed, and took his shirt off, revealing a perfect six pack.

"Whoa..."

"Aaaanyway, the final guest today is **Talon Graveshadow.**" Lionel said.

**Doc! What's up!?**

"Not much." Doc shrugged,

**So, if we're all genderbent, does that mean I'M a girl? Yes? No? **

"Yes, Talon, you're a chick now." Doc smiled. "How does it feel?"

**Whatever, I still have dares!**

**Kia, go eat a boat.**

"WHAT?! NO! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!"

"What if it was a boat made of candy?" Lionel asked slyly.

"... Take me to the candy boat." Kia said, drooling.

Pretty soon, Kia was eating away at a boat made of candy.

**Rebecca, see how YOU like wearing miniskirts...**

"She's goth right now, so this should be good..." Sei grinned, handing Rebecca the bubble gum pink miniskirt.

"Ew. No way." Rebecca turned her nose to the miniskirt.

"You will do it or you will be sent to the Sues." Sei growled.

"Whats your problem?" Rebecca asked, and took the miniskirt. When she finished changing, Rebecca was wearing the skirt with a corset top that her boobs were spilling out of.

"... We didn't tell you to change your shirt too..." Doc sweatdropped.

**Envy, GTFO! **

"What?! Why?!"

**No, don't argue, JUST GO!**

"Fine. I don't like it here anyway." Envy sneered, and left.

**Well, I had to make him/her/it go because... WTF?! NO GENDER! How do you flip**

**no gender?! **

"Um, the thing that genderbent people exploded when we tried to genderbent him/her/it..." Doc explained, scratching the back of his neck.

**Eh hem... anyways, Emily, go swim in this nearby lake of milk.**

"Hell no!" Emily snarled.

"Yes you will! And you will put your flat chest into this!" Kia held up a bikini.

"No. Goddamn. Way. In. Hell." Emily annunciated.

"Yes goddamn way in hell." Kia nodded, and dragged Emily to the changing room. Emily came out wearing a coverup, and made a break for milk pool, and GOR in while wearing the coverup.

**And... that's it. Sorreh.**

"It's fine, chica." Doc smiled. "Well, I guess that's it for today's episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone exclaimed, running off as "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" blared.

**A/N: Methinks ill genderbent the chapters for a while longer. :) I had fun this weekend! I got to hang out at a hotel with some friends. I won't mention the fiascos that occurred, like me accidentally using the men's changing room, getting busted by the hotel staff for noise complaints, the sheer amount of wrestling, kicking some ass, proclaiming myself the awesome Prussia, sleeping under a desk... **

**... Dang I just mentioned it. Oh well.**

**REVIEW!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lionel, and Kia**


	27. The Last of the Gender Bender

**A/N: Ready for more genderbending weirdness! No? Too bad! :) Just so you know, all you reviewers and PMers and Guests shall be genderbent as well. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA, Sei, Lionel, Kia, the guests, or Sei's stuff. I do however, own the moon base and my remote.**

Doc strolls casually in, with his hands in his pockets. "I don't have much to say today. So welcome to another genderbent episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted and ran onstage as "Gangnam Syle" blasted from the speakers.

"Sorry that we're still genderbent. Kia broke the machine." Sei glared at the smaller girl.

"What? I was just enjoying my snow cone when a wire came out of no where and tripped me!" Kia defended.

"I thought you liked Icees." Em noted.

"Apparently it got switched along with my gender." Kia dismissed.

"I blame you and your new assets." Doc grumbled.

"Whatever." Kia dismissed her brother. "Our first guest today is **XAka-kitsune-toriX**."

***Aka comes in the door casually with Eddie, Yuki, and Sin following***

**Aka- Hi everyone! Did ya mis me?**

**Eddie- Aka wasn't in the hospital or anything, he was just busy with school.**

**Aka- Yep, got B's and two D's for the first quarter. D was for English and Religion.**

"So we're NOT the only ones going to Catholic school!" Kia exclaimed.

"Shut up, Kia."

**Yuki- Moving on.**

**Aka- Ok. First of all, I want Rebecca, Wrath, Pride, Lust, Leia (I'm sorry Leia **(that would be Ling)**), Scar, Em (I'm also sorry Em), Eddie-**

**Eddie- WHAT!?**

**Aka- SHUT IT! And Envy *Sin glares at Aka* ..never mind Envy... Any ways, I want all of you to go to the haunted orphanage in Hiroshima, Japan. **

**Sin- And try not to get killed by the ghosts of the orphan children.**

"WHAT?! GHOSTS?! WHERE?! HOLD ME NEE-SAN!" Kia exclaimed, jumping into Doc's arms Scooby-doo style.

"You have got to get over your fear of ghosts." He sweatdropped. "And you always hated it when I've called you nee-chan before. You said that it was a car..."

"SHUT UP AND HIDE ME FROM THE GHOSTS!"

**Aka- Oh and Em, take human Angel with you.**

**Angel- *Changes back to a human* Let's go!**

**Eddie- You got this idea from the song Kagome Kagome huh?**

**Aka- Yep! And while they are gone, make sure to check on them every so often. Also, Larry **(Its Lan Fan. I couldn't think of anything else... -.-") **cant follow Leia.**

"NO! PRINCESS!" Larry shouted as Lionel dragged the mentioned away.

**Yuki- While they are gone, Hughes, how old were you when you met Greg **(Gracia)**?**

"I met him when he was working part time at a flower shop. I came everyday to 'see the roses,' and I asked him out one day! And here we are~" Marcia laughed.

**Aka- Rick, how old were you when you got the tattoo from your mom?**

"I was about six or seven. It hurt like hell, but it was worth it, knowing that I kept her prized secret."

**Yuki- Larry, how old were you when you started guarding Leia?**

"I joined my grandmother when I was thirteen." Larry stated.

**Aka- That's all...for now. And Em still needs to keep Angel a little longer. And hold on to Eddie till i come back.**

**Aka, Yuki, Sin- Bye! *leaves***

"Bye!" Everyone shouts.

"Should we check on the people in the orphanage now?" Doc asked.

"Sure, why not." Sei shrugged, and pushed a button. Above everyone's head, a screen fizzled to life, showing an image of the eight people who had to go, huddled in a corner and screaming. Well, they were mostly just screaming because Rebecca was talking to the ghosts while reading dark poetry.

"We should probably bring the, back now..."

"Yeah..." So they were brought back.

"OH THANK GOD!"

"Weird..." Lionel deadpanned. "Our next guest is **bobby dylan**. Hi Barb!"

***poofs up* I AM BACK *scary theme song of mannan plays* but anyway**

**it has in fact come to my attention that Rick has not once been happy in this**

**entire fanfiction so i dare you to put a wide smile so big that everyone can**

**see**

Rick sighed, and put on a big smile that freaked everyone out. Mostly because Rick had no idea how to smile properly.

"HE'S SMILING! IT'S WEIRD! MAKE IT STOP!" Jeanne wailed.

"It may be the only time Rick's ever smiled, but this is the first time Barb came in not starting with 'I ask Rick.' _That's _weird. Cool, but a bit unusual." Lionel noted.

"You're right... Anyway, the next guest is me, **seikatsu-chan**." Sei smiled before going to start work on the gender swapping machine.

**"Hi. I haven't reviewed in a while, have I?" asked Sei.**

"You have not reviewed in a while." Doc agreed.

**"Well," Sei said, reaching up to touch his hair, "I definitely saw _that_**

**coming Doc. You get a nice haircut, but I get an afro like my dad? What's up**

**with that?"**

**"**My hair looks exactly like Kia's did, and now her hair looks like mine did. You have an afro because I believe that if you were a dude, you would have an Afro since your hair is so darn curly!" Doc explained loudly.

**"While I fix the genderbending machine so we can change back and I don't have**

**to see the blond gothic crazy lady, I may as well do some dares," he said.**

"Well, she's still at the orphanage..." Kia noted.

"No, she's not."

"Right..."

**"First, I want Al to discover the internet. I can't believe he isn't on there**

**all the time. I mean, 20000000 pictures of cats. Hello?"**

"KITTIES?!" Ali demanded, and zoomed over to a computer. "They told me that the Internet was full of porn!" She squealed before googling kitties.

"Dammit, Sei! This is why we never told her! She wouldn't do dares anymore because she'd be too hooked onto the Internet!" Doc groaned.

"KITTIES!" Kia exclaimed, and joined Ali at the computer.

"NOT HELPING!"

**"Second, I'd like Kia to wear this outfit," Sei said, holding up a Snow White**

**costume and chuckles evilly. "It's been a while since you wore this, hasn't**

**it?"**

Kia's eyes went wide. "NO! I REFUSE! YOU WANNOT MAKE ME!" She insisted, running into Ali's old suit of armor to hide.

"Come out, little Kia~" Sei said evilly before tossing the outfit to Doc.

"Come on, onee-san~ put on the outfit for big brother~" Doc sang.

"I REFUSE!" Kia whined.

After about an hour of Kia evasion, she was in the dress, complete with heels, tiara, and scepter.

"I HATE YOU ALL!"

"But you look so cute~" Doc cackled before taking many pictures.

"SOMEONE GIVE ME A GUN!"

"No."

"DAMMIT!"

**"Third, I want to see if Envy would grow fruit if we planted him. It sounds**

**cool."**

"Sounds plausible." Rick said, still smiling.

"Dude, stop that." Hilary shivered.

"LET US PLANT A COCONUT!" Doc shouted. "GET THE PALM TREE!"

"YAH!" Everyone replied, and the chase began.

After Envy was planted, he grew coconuts.

"Yay~"

**"Fourth, I want everyone to make a human pyramid."**

"YOU HEARD THE DUDE! PYRAMID TIME!" Lionel shouted. "GOGOGO!"

The pyramid was a huge success, until someone on the bottom sneezed, sending everyone toppling down.

"BARROWMAN!"

**"And last, but not least, can someone please slap that cow? It's mooing is**

**annoying me to no end!"**

"I'll do it!" Em volunteered, and slapped the cow.

"What is going on?" Kia demanded.

"I don't have the slightest clue." Lionel shook his head.

"I JUST SLAPPED A COW!" Em shouted victoriously.

"... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Doc and Sei laughed.

"What?"

**Something pops, and the machine starts to smoke. "NONONONONONONONONONONONO.**

**This can not be happening," Sei says and starts flipping levers and pushing**

**buttons. "Go onto the next reviewer while I try to stop this place from**

**exploding."**

"You got it!" Doc gave a thumbs up. "The final guest today is **Dragonlover71491**."

**Nicely done, though you may want to change the cast back to normal, I don't know if they like being the opposite gender.**

"Sei's working on it." Doc crossed his arms.

**Anyway, let's do this.**

**(Package for Em arrives) **"Wow Em, what'd you get?"** Doc inquires.**

"Don't know yet, I got to open it." Em smiles.

**(She opens it, only to have a small black dragon smooch her on the cheek!)**

"Ew! Gross! Dragon slobber!"

**(Flies around Em's head) Don't you just love my entrances? Now let's get this show on the road! But before that, I believe I owe Kia here some cookies. (Snaps claws) You may want to move to a safe distance of about 100 ft. (Curls up into ball, rolling away)**

"Why?"

**(Mt. Fuji size pile of cookies lands in the middle of the room, nearly suffocating Kia) I believe that covers what I owe you, huh little guy?**

"COOOOOOOOOKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEE EEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!" Kia drools, and dives into the cookie mountain.

"I believe that is why."

**(Lands on Sei's head) To start, let's turn Rebecca into a kitten and give him to Ali. Prepare to be smothered to death, flame girl! (Cackles devilishly)**

Doc quickly pressed a button on his remote that turned Rebecca into a black cat.

"Mrow?" She looked up in confusion.

"Rebecca is wondering why the hell we all look so big." Doc explained.

"KITTY!" Ali squealed, and left the computer to grab Rebecca and give her a huge hug.

"Hiss!"

"Rebecca is complaining about her lack of air."

**Now, let's stick Rick in Lust's outfit! Have fun Rick! (Dodges bullet) Ha! You missed me, you missed me, you miss...(Rick hits me with a fly-swatter) Ouchie! That hurt! (Cries like a baby.)**

After a couple of minutes of bribing, screaming, and running away, Rick is now wearing Lust's tux.

"Wow. He looks good."

"But where did the fly swatted come from?"

**(Gets over being swatted) Next, what do you say we use the opposite gun on Em? It should be interesting.**

**"**Lets do it!" Doc cheered, and used the opposite gun in Em.

Em quickly turned into a sweet adorable little girl with a sunny personality and a pink sundress with flowing gold hair. "Hi! It's so good to see you! I love you all!" Em smiled, and started giving everyone hugs.

"WHAT IS THIS?! THIS IS UNNATURAL! MKE IT STOOOOOP!"

**(Curls around Doc's feet) And lastly, let's turn Rick into a pony, at least that way he can't use his guns. No fingers!**

Doc used the pony gun on Rick, who turned into a blue stallion with a gun cutie mark.

"DAMMIT! No thumbs!"

**(Jumps onto Rebecca's head) I've had my fun for today, bye everyone! (Poofs out of sight.)**

"MEOOOOOW!" Rebecca yowled.

"I believe that Rebecca is demanding that you change her back. Oh well, this has been another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone cheered and ran off stage as the ending theme played.

**A/N: Well this got delayed... I'm such a procrastinator. Well, I have news. I'm going to end this fic for a few reasons. 1, because I've been working on this for too long, 2, I need to start finishing my fics, 3, I procrastinate too much on this, and 4, all good things must come to an end. I'm stopping at chapter 30, so just be aware of that, okay? Thank you all for understanding.**

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't.**

**~Doc, Sei, Lionel, and Kia**


	28. Chibis Everywhere!

**A/N: Hello, I've been procrastinating, yet again. *sigh* Well, Midterms, so I've been procrastinating a lot lately, and I've just recently gotten a whole butt-load of guest reviews. I got one from SANTA! SANTA! And Jar Jar Binks. All I want to know is how you people manage to find this thing, when it hasn't been updated in forever. Not that I'm not grateful, I'm just confused... O.o**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for me and my bow tie.**

* * *

Doc came into the studio, dragging herself by her hands. "Just... A little... Further... AGH!" She exclaimed as she flopped to the floor in front of the camera. "Oh, we're on? Oh right! I forgot!" Doc quickly stood up, and dusted herself off. "As you can see, we're off the genderbending, I forgot if we already stopped that. Anyways, welcome to another fun-tastic episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouts and pools in front of the camera as the theme song blasted.

"And our first reviewer today is... Give it up for everyone's favorite dragon... **Dragonlover71491**!" Doc shouted.

**(Little black dragon pops out of Doc's shirt) "Whoops..." (Pulls out map) "Should have taken a left at Albuquerque." (Wiggles out and plops onto the floor)**

"WHOA! NOT COOL, DL, NOT COOL!" Doc shouted, covering up the top of her shirt.

"Dunno, that's a pretty cool trick." Roy smirked.

"Shut up, Roy, no one likes you." Doc growled.

"At least I can get a date."

"Oh you want to go there?"

"It depends, sweetheart~"

"Okay then, WINTER SPIRITS ARE HOTTER THAN YOU. YOU'RE AN OLD FART."

Roy spent the rest of the time sitting in the emo corner, playing with little bits of fire while sobbing.

**(Trots over to Kai, sitting at his feet) "Now, Kai, can you please give me the opposite gun?"**

"Okay, here you are." Kai smiles as he passes the gun to the tiny dragon.

**(Grabs the gun with mouth) "Thank you."**

**(Flutters to the middle of the room) "Now to business."**

**(Drops the gun and starts trampling it to bits)**

"YAY!"

**"Good start..."**

**(Pulls out mallet and mashes it further)**

"YAY! AGAIN!"

"A bit more..."  
(Sets pieces on fire)

"YAY EVEN MORE!"

**"Not enough yet..."**

**(Dumps water on pieces)**

"YAY ANOTHER TIME!"

**"Just a bit more..."**

**(Grab Gluttony by the head, dropping him on the pieces)**

"Yay!"

**"Nope, not satisfied yet..."**

**(Rolls Gluttony away before sweeping up the pieces, dumping them in a metal trash can, setting them on fire again)**

"Yay."

**"Not yet..."**

**(Digs hole in the floor, pushing the trash can in)**

"Yay..."

**"And to make sure..."**

**(Flies off, only to come back driving a cement truck)**

"Whoop-di-doo."

**"Please move back everyone!"**

**(Fills hole with cement)**

"Are you done yet?"

**"Almost."**

**(Pulls out steel plate, bolting it over the filled hole.)**

"Seriously, this is taking forever."

**"And to be sure this thing is never used again."**

**(Places sign over the hole, it reads "Do not try and use unless you want to be set on fire by a chibi dragon," and I grin at my work) "Now we're good, that thing was becoming a nuisance."**

"Oh thank god!"

**Now to the real fun...let's start by turning Riza into a chibi, and giving her some pop guns. Try and shoot me now Riza!**

Sei grinned, and activated a laser that chibi-fied Riza and turned her guns into pop guns. Riza's expression hardened, and she aimed a gun at Sei, and the other at DL. Both guns fired, but only a cork popped out of each. Riza's expression was so shocked and confused, everyone started 'aww'ing at the cuteness.

**Next, let's turn Ed into a chibi dragon like me for a minute, and he'll see how fun it is to fly and breathe fire!**

Lynn flipped a switch and turned Ed into a chibi dragon with gold scales. Ed blinked, and opened his mouth, only to have a small blast of fire come out with a series of chirps. He growled (cutely) in frustration, and flapped his tiny wings, and got a few feet off the ground before spitting out another small burst of flame.

Needless to say, there was more 'aww'ing.

**Now let's make Roy and Riza do a tango, with costumes. Make sure Riza wears something that shows a little leg! (Dodges bullet) I'm a faster than you think!**

"Then me must chibi-fy Roy!" Sei exclaimed, and chibi-fied Roy. Next, she fired one of her costume changing guns at chibi-Roy and chibi-Riza, putting Roy in a ruffly red dress shirt with black pants, vest, and tie, and a tiny rose in his mouth. Riza was in a bright red dress with a slit on her right leg going up to her mid thigh, her hair done in a beautiful Spanish style.

"Now DANCE!" Doc commanded, and turned on tango music, which was scientifically done so that the two had to dance, even against their will.

Cue the 'aww'ing.

**And finally, how about we have everyone do the chicken dance, just for laughs.**

"YAY!" Everyone excluding Roy, Riza, and Ed shouted, and started doing the chicken dance.

**(Jumps onto Al's head, settling down comfortably) "Well, I've had my fun for today, but now I have to go for now." (Kisses Al's forehead before poofing out)**

"Bye!" Everyone shouted, and Al pressed a hand to his forehead, a blush spreading across his cheeks. Thankfully, no one but you, the viewer, noticed it.

"Next up is our favorite Guest, the Guest that comes here the most often, **bobby dylan**!" Sei introduced.

hello everybody i have been waiting for the next chapter of this

"Heheh, yeah..." Doc grinned, and scratched the back of her neck.

**any way i ask doc have you met doc brown from back to the future because here he is *doc brown appears* have fun because he is here for the rest of the chapter**

"Great Scott!" Doc Brown exclaimed, observing his surroundings.

"I have never met this guy." Doc said. "Nice to meetcha, Doc, I'm Doc!" She introduced herself.

"Hello! Do you like Science?"

"Yes I do! Do you want to see my time machine?"

"Would I! I have a time traveling Delorean, if you're interested."

"Nah, not my style. Police Boxes are more my thing. Let's go!"

"Lets!" Doc Brown replied as the two Docs left the studio to compare time machines.

"Well that was... fun." Sei scrunched her eyebrows.

"Our next set of dares is from another Guest, **Jean Jumper**!" Lynn said.

**Hello audience any way this is a Ask which goes to ed are you King Edward from kings quest 1:Quest for the crown**

Chibi!Dragon!Ed tilted his head to the side and shook his head, indicating that no, he was not, and that he had never even heard of King's Quest 1: Quest for the Crown.

"Well, our final set of dares for today is from yet another Guest, **Chuggy Choo Choo**!" Kai stated.

**Gwarrf GOOP anyways this is to Lynn buy some shrinking solution**

"Sure!" Lynn replied, and went to buy some shrinking solution. When she came back, she held a small CVS bag. "Now what?"

"OOH! SHRINK ME, SHRINK ME!" Kai exclaimed.

"Okay!" Lynn replied, and dumped the whole thing on Kai's head. Almost immediately, Kai shrunk to the size of an Oreo.

"COOL!" Kai squealed, sounding like he just inhaled helium.

"Um, it only lasts a few-"

_POOF_

"-seconds..." Lynn finished as Kai popped back to regular size.

"Aw..." Kai looked dejectedly at the floor.

"Well," Sei looked at the camera. "This has been another fun-filled episode of-"

_BOOM!_

Both Docs reappeared, riding in the Delorean. "Holy crap, that was amazing!" Doc exclaimed excitedly.

"Doc! We're just finishing up!" Kai huffed.

"Oh. THANKS FOR WATCHING!" Doc waved at the camera as the ending theme played and the lights faded out.

* * *

**A/N: Nope, I felt too spontaneous for a regular ending. One down, two more chapters to go.**

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	29. Guests Lots of 'em

**A/N: Yes, I'm doing another. It's taking hardly any time at all! I wonder why I procrastinated so much on it... oh well!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my bit of the studio.**

* * *

Doc was standing in front of the camera, a pen in hand, drawing on her palm. She kept drawing for a few more seconds before she looked up and noticed the camera. "Oh hi!" She said, and turned her hand around so that a drawing of an anime style cat was facing the camera. "I drew a kitty! But anywho, here's another episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted, and ran onstage as the lights flashed and the theme music played.

"Alright! I get to introduce the first person!" Kai cheered. "Our first guest today is a Guest, going by the name **Some Show**."

**Elliptical Elements present a ask To kai are you the daughter of Jeff dunham**

"Okay, first off, I'M A DUDE!" Kai screeched. "And who's Jeff Dunham?"

"Uh, Kai, Jeff Dunham is a ventriloquist and a comedian." Sei informed.

"... Never heard of him." Kai deadpanned. "So no. Sorry to disappoint you, but I know my own dad."

"Our next guest is another Guest, **Top Man**." Lynn says.

**This ask goes to roy mah boi Pewdiepie or tobuscus**

"Pewdiepie all the way!" Roy shouted.

"Yeah!" Doc high fived the Flame Alchemist.

"NO! TOBUSCUS!" Kai protested.

"Go away, Kai."

"Anywho, our next guest is another Guest, **Contact Form**." Sei stated.

**Hello audience I AM SICK AND TIRED OF MANGA so here is Something new called magma *pours lava over everybody***

"You missed!" Sei shouted as the magma dripped off of the giant forcefield covering everyone.

"Whoa... When was this installed?" Lynn asked.

"Recently." Sei shrugged.

"Well, our last guest today is another Guest, **Singer Business**." Doc said.

**a song for riza: if your and you dont know why dont you go where fashion sits puttin on the ritz if you cant find anything new go to your favorite place park avenue buy some spiked up collars white spats and lots of dollars spending every dime for a wonderful time**

"Puttin on the Ritz by Taco." Riza stated. "Thanks for that."

"Since that was incredibly short, we're going to so another guest!" Doc shouted. "Please welcome our final guest for today, another Guest, **Santa Claus**!"

**HO HO HOOOOOO here is a gift for doc since this fanfiction is going to end soon i thought *gives doc doctor who the complete series***

"OMG THANK YOU, NORTH!" Doc squealed, and ran away to watch Doctor Who.

"Huh? Since when was Santa Claus called North?" Al asked.

"Since she was obsessing over Rise of the Guardians. Where else did she go while she wasn't here?" Sei stated.

"So that winter spirit comment last chapter..."

"Yup, was referring to Jack Frost." Kai nodded. "Did you know she-" Kai was about to reveal something potentially embarrassing when a large book was thrown at Kai's head, knocking the boy out.

"JUST END THIS SO I CAN WATCH TV!"

"FINE! This has been another fun filled episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted as the lights dimmed and the ending theme played.

* * *

**A/N: Yes, I'm giving no room for reviews from the last chapter to now. One more left! I'll leave some room for that one.**

**PM if you have dares, review if you don't!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


	30. The Journey's End

**A/N: Well friends, here we are. The final chapter of Ask and Dare 3. In this chapter, I'm going to do every single remaining dares I have, which is about 18. 15 of them being Guest reviews. Well, here we go. Yes, we have special theme songs for this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything- ah, forget it. I own everything! WHOOO! :)**

* * *

The lights flared on in the studio revealing Doc standing center stage. Her normal pink Tshirt had been swapped out for a black one, but other than that, she was still smiling. "Hi guys! Thanks for sticking with us for so long. But you don't want to hear me ramble. So without further ado, welcome to the final episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" everyone shouted, and ran onstage, the hosts all sporting black Tshirts. The lights flashed different colors as "Viva la Vida" by Coldplay played over the speakers.

"Okay, our first guest today is a Guest, **Weird Beard**." Doc stated.

**I ask everybody WHY CANT WE BE NORMAL CARTOON CHARACTERS**

"Because cartoon characters aren't normal."

"Our next guest is a Guest, **babba gabba**." Sei said.

**BEHOLD THE GREAT POWERFUL BABBA GABBA well anyway i shall ask docterwhoandtheolympiains WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HARRY POTTER BOOK**

"The first person to use my full name... And they spell 'Doctor' wrong..." Doc pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Your full name is DoctorWhotaliaandtheOlympian s?" Havoc asked.

"Yes. What do you think that long word next to the title of the story is?" Doc deadpanned.

"I thought that was just a word..." He admitted.

"You're an idiot. And my favorite Harry Potter book would have to be... The Peisoner of Azkaban. It was the only one that had nothing to do with Voldemort, and Harry met the person responsible for him, as well as his father's best friends. Not to mention time travel, a werewolf, and a hippogriff." Doc stated.

"Our next guest is another Guest, **General Black**." Lynn read.

**General Black:Hi SOLDIER 1  
soldier 1:YES SIR YES SIR  
general: PROTECT ME  
soldier 1:YES SIR YES SIR *points gun at ed* we ask sei do you work for  
superman**

"No, Superman works alone." Sei shrugged before pulling out a walkie talkie. "Sei to base, Sei to base, they are onto us, I repeat, they are onto us."

_"Roger that, Sei. Just play dumb!"_ The voice on the other end replied. Sei hid the walkie talkie behind her back and smiled.

"No, I definitely don't work for Superman."

"Liar." Kai deadpanned.

"Am not." Sei rolled her eyes. "I work for SHIELD. I told you, Superman works alone."

_"That's not playing dumb!"_

"Sorry, Mr. Fury!"

"Anyway, our next guest is a Guest, who goes by **jar jar binks**." Kai said boredly before his eyes popped out of his head. "Holy crap, JAR JAR BINKS! :D"

"Down boy..."

**hewoo mesa gungan style so i awsk thesa queshawn rizzar wha area yousa so scary**

"I'm not scary, I just prefer to intimidate my enemies." Riza replied without missing a beat.

"But why?" Kai asked.

"Being a woman in the military, nobody takes me seriously, so I make them." Riza said simply.

"Ooooookay. Next guest is a Guest called Gary Gwalior." Doc smiled.

**Try to decode this riza: UYO UCSK**

"Child's play. It says 'YOU SUCK.'" Riza said, unfazed.

"Wow. Next guest is our old friend, **XAka-kitsune-toriX**." Sei grinned.

***Yuki walks in alone***

**Yuki: I really dont know why no one else came except me. But Aka is busy with  
school. Anyway, I just came here to pick up Emi and Angel.**

**Emi: Ok, Bye. *Runs out the door***

**Yuki: Ok Angel, say bye to Ed.**

**Angel: Aww...ok *Hugs Ed* Bye-bye~ *Walks out the door***

"Goodbye, Angel, you were the only animal that didn't try to kill me." Ed grimaced.

"Even the lizards!"

"Yes Roy, the tiny lizards almost killed me, GET OVER IT."

**Yuki: Alright, see ya guys. *Walks out***

"Bye, Yuki. Take care! Say hi to the others for me!"

"Our next guest is **EeveeAlchemist**." Lynn said. "Another old friend."

***Comes in wearing a sparkly fancy blue tanktop, jacket overtop and a  
miniskirt* Curse you, friend-who's-name-I-will-not-mention for making me wear  
this all friggen day.. And Roy, not a word out of you. *Glares at him***

Roy said nothing, but instead let out a (manly) giggle.

**Its been a while since I've come up with anything for this.**

"It has been a while."

**So, Doc, youre obsessed with Rise of the Guardians? I saw it not too long ago.  
Sooooo... Lets bring in Jack Frost, the Easter Bunny, and Sandy, take Ed, Al,  
and Roy, and throw them all in a closet together, lock it, and see what  
happens by the end of the chapter.**

"YES." Doc said excitedly, wearing the face of epic fangirling before summoning a portal that dumped Jack, Bunny, and Sandy onto the floor of the studio.

"What in the bloody hell is going on?!" Bunny demanded, pulling out his boomerangs.

"Just a dare show." Doc grinned. Jack looked confused, and Sandy flashed a bunch of sand pictograms. "I didn't get any of that. Now, INTO THE CLOSET, THE SIX OF YOU." Doc shouted, and shoved the six mentioned into a closet. "They can come out momentarily to do any future dares that come their way."

"Why am I in here?!" Jack demanded from the closet.

"Just go with it." Ed assured. "These people are crazy."

***Looks at Doc* Can I throw Envy into space and let him float there for all  
eternity? Just because I still hate his guts? Though not as much now since I  
rewatched Brotherhood.. *Throws him out the door***

"Go ahead! Seeing as you've already done it." Doc noted.

**And.. I'm done. Because I'm still not good at these. See ya!**

"Bye!"

"Our next guest is a Guest named **voldester**." Kai said.

**to riza i know about your soft side with the dog named roverada**

"I don't know what you're talking about. My dog's name is Black Hayate." Riza said.

"Our next guest is a Guest called **anonym**." Doc read.

**here some final chapter gifts *gives ed an i phone 4* *gives kai a laptop* *gives riza a dogtreat***

"What good will this do me?!" Ed demanded from the closet.

"Be thankful, brother." Al scolded.

"YES! A LAPTOP!" Kai cheered before playing on it. Riza just gave her dog treat to Black Hayate.

"Our next Guest is **docteroctogonpus**." Sei said.

**i am docteroctogonapus so what do you do doc**

"Well, I can-"

**oh yeah i can do that better oh you want to see *does it in 0.1 second***

"I haven't done anything yet!" Doc protested. "I was going to say that I could be everywhere at once!"

"Our next Guest is **queen david**." Lynn said.

**here a song for everybody: *bass starts to play* YO V.I.P  
queen & david bowie: *push him out of the way* *sings* boom boom ba ba be boom boom ba be be  
vanilla ice:YO V.I.P  
*david pushes vanilla ice again* *sings* PRESSURE RUNNING DOWN ME RUNNING DOWN ON YOU RUNNING UNDER PRESSURE  
vanilla ice:YO V.I.P (they chase vanilla ice)**

"Sei, put down the pitchfork." Lynn sweatdropped.

"VANILLA ICE MUST DIE FOR STEALING THAT BASS LINE!" Sei cried out.

"Crazy lady... Our next Guest is **gamer opinion**." Kai stated.

**hey doc play happy wheels**

"I did. Irresponsible dad amuses me." Doc smirked. "Our next Guest is **colonel sanders**."

**i am your new boss riza my predecessor is relived of duty i am colonial sanders**

"Impossible, Sir. Colonel Mustang has been in the closet for all of about ten minutes. There is no way the higher ups would allow someone to replace him so soon."

"Just go to your new boss." Kai sighed.

"Kai, I would advise that you keep silent." Riza glared.

"Yes ma'am."

"Anywho, our next Guest is **cool mail**." Sei said.

**doc do you have any pop cap games**

"No I do not." Doc replied. "I do Game Center."

"The next Guest is **jokey smurf**." Lynn said.

**HUYUK HUYUK HUYUK here you go *gives riza a gift* its a suprize HUYUK HUYUK HUYUK**

"Thank you, but I don't like surprises." Riza stated.

"The next Guest is **keha**, but I think that dude meant Kesha." Kai said.

"What makes you say that?"

**I AM KE$HA I SUCK**

"That's what." Kai replied.

"Oh."

"Well, we all knew that she sucked anyway."

"I dunno, some of her songs are pretty good."

"Shut up, Ling!"

"The next Guest is **arry otter**." Doc said..

**to kai what is going on girl your boyfriend is waiting outside this place**

"First off, I am a DUDE! Second, I'm single." Kai grumbled.

"Whoa, calm down." Sei said. "Our final review is from the only guy that we know of who reads this, **Talon Graveshadow**."

**Talon walks in wearing a black suit, a black Stetson upon his head.  
"I understand this is the final installment of Ask and Dare?"**

"Yes, yes it is. Nice suit, but the way."

"Stetsons are cool"

**"Well then, allow me to tell you all a story." Talon opens a book, pulling it from Doc's bookcase.**

"Story time!"

"I didn't know I had that book."

**"Once upon a time, a young noob to the internet had come across something that interested him. A world known as 'Fanfiction'. It was through this marvelous site that this young one learnt of My Little Pony, Doctor Who, Fullmetal Alchemist, and various other things. One of the first stories he read was something called... Ask and Dare. A simple, and entertaining story, this young one decided to participate. His name was Talon Graveshadow. Over time, Talon smiled every time he saw a new chapter, and was utterly devastated when the story was deleted. But then the sequel popped up. And all was right. Until, well, you know." Talon glances up at Doc.**

"Heheh, yeah..." Doc scratched the back of her neck and developed a sudden interest in looking at the floor.

**"So thanks Doc. I couldn't have asked for a better introduction to the internet. I couldn't of asked for a better story." Smiling, Talon pulls out a piece of paper.**

"Thanks, Talon. That means a lot to hear that." Doc smiled.

**"Anyways, I do indeed have dares." Talon puts on his glasses.  
"Shall we begin?**

"Yes!" The hosts called.

"No!" Everyone else called.

**Envy, for old times sake..." Talon whips out a pie and smashes it into the Homunculus's face.**

"Wow, chucked into space and a pie in the face." Kai snickered.

"Shut up, mortal." Envy growled.

**"Ah, so satisfying. Anyways, Roy, your dare shall be to draw a picture of Ed, while Ed will do the same for you." Talon grins.**

Doc snapped her fingers and summoned Ed and Roy out from the closet, and placed the two in front of easels.

"And... Go!" Lynn called, and both men started drawing furiously.

**"Shall we see the results?" Talon cackles.**

Ed showed his drawing of Roy, which was just a stick figure on fire with a speech bubble stating 'I am a stupid moron.' Roy's drawing was of a shrimp.

Needless to say, this ended up in a fight, so Doc snapped her fingers and put the two back into the closet.

**"Now, Greed, your dare is to fight with Gandalf. Or Dumbledore. Your choice."**

"Hm... I'll take Dumbledore. He's dead." Greed smirked, and walked away.

"... Cheater."

**"Hawkeye, trade eyes with an actual hawk."**

Riza nodded, and Sei fired a laser at Riza that turned her eyes into those of a hawks. "How do I look?" Riza questioned. She looked downright creepy, with her beady black eyes that followed your every movement... Creepy...

**"Al, trade bodies with a kitten."**

Doc snapped her fingers, and Al was out of the closet. Kai pushed a button, and Al's body turned into that of a kitten.

Al was very pleased.

Back to the closet!

**"Now, for some questions" Talon flips the paper over.  
"Hohenheim, answer me this. If your first, mortal body existed way back with Xerxes, why the hell does it have such a striking resemblance to Ed and Al?"**

"Because they're my sons, so of course they look like me." Hohenheim chuckled. There was much banging and protests from the closet.

**"Kai, how do you feel about this all ending?"**

"Oh, I don't care."

"Way to be subtle..."

**"Doc, you?"**

"I'm a bit sad that I'm ending it, but it was becoming a real chore for me to update this, to the point where I just didn't want to do it. Don't get me wrong, I love this fic with all my heart, and I got so much positive encouragement from it, but all good things must come to an end, and lets face it, I need to start completing my fics..." Doc scratched at the inside of her arm. "So, I'm sad, but sort of happy, you know?"

"Boring!" Kai shouted, and threw a popcorn kernel at Doc.

"... Idjiment."

**"What's your favorite accent Lust?"**

"French." Lust replied. "They are the best lovers, non?"

"Wrong! Italians are the best lovers!"

"No, definitely the French."

**"Do you like sourdough bread Al?"**

"Not particularly." Al said from the closet.

**"And, I suppose that's it. Thanks for the story, Doc." Talon bows.**

"You're welcome, Talon. I'm glad that I could help you enjoy the wonders that this website has to offer."

"Dull!"

"Quiet, you!"

**"Sé onr sverdar sitja hvass! May your swords stay sharp!" Talon walks out the door, a hand raised in farewell as he exits.**

"Bye!" Everyone shouts.

"Now before I forget, I'm going to check the closet to see how things are going." Doc chuckled, and opened the door, revealing Jack, Bunny, Ed, and Roy all asleep, with little dream sand images dancing over their heads. Jack was snuggling into Bunny's side while Ed was curled up against Roy's chest. In the corner, Sandy and Al were having a pleasant conversation with lots of sandy images.

"... This is sooooooo a Kodak moment." Sei grinned evilly, and whipped out a camera, snapping pictures furiously. Doc put a hand over her mouth to stop herself from laughing, Lynn didn't even try stopping her laughter, and Kai wasn't paying attention.

"Well, this has been our final episode of..."

"ASK! AND! DARE! 3! WHOOO!" Everyone shouted as the lights flashed off as "Angel with a Shotgun" by The Cab played.

* * *

**A/N: Wow... I'm done. I'm actually done. I just wanted to say thanks for being there for me, guys. I've learned so much from writing this series of fics, mostly the site rules, since I kept being reminded during Ask and Dare and Ask and Dare 2. But I believe that this has made me a better writer, as I could make you all laugh with my weird humor. But mostly, I'm glad that I had an impact, however small, on your lives.**

**Can I just say that I love you guys to bits? Well I did, so there. Thanks again, and check out my other fanfictions as well! (Shameless self advertising)**

**And also, for those of you who like Rise of the Guardians, my friend chibichibiichigo is working on a fanfiction called "Soulmates," which is the sequel to her other story "Winter smiles." Just as a warning, "Soulmates" is rated M. But I advise checking them out and dropping a review. They're worth the read!**

**~Doc, Sei, Lynn, and Kai**


End file.
